#NerdsUnite: The Ramblings of a Raconteuse (Thank you Chris Evans)

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Helenna. We met on twitter not too long ao, and she's totes mcgotes one rad chiquita banana with a flare for all things flair! That's right, Helenna here is what we call an artsy fartsy nerd. She's a poet, into all things dramatic arts, and she's going to come on board to write each week about her love of said drama. Well not like actual drama drama, like some cat fight shit - but you get the idea. I only have one thing left to say ... HIT IT HELENNA!!! </editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @Helslevy

Being an actor can be a crazy-making thing. Whenever I hear another actor open up about their fears and anxieties I always feel like I’m not alone, and am actually a part of an insane daredevil group.

While it’s true that we’re not doing something as miraculous as saving lives every day, there is still something very brave about the way we put ourselves out there time and time again.

I’ve been thinking a lot about the chatter in my head lately.  I recently had a audition for a great network comedy that resulted in a callback.  While the callback was fine, I kept thinking about all of the things that didn’t go the way I wanted them to.  Of course, ideally I would have left it all in the room, walked away, and not given it a second thought.  After all, it’s usually the roles you don’t think about too much or really care if you book, that you end up getting.  A lot of people kick around the saying that “you do your best audition in the car on the way home,”  which is not a good thing, but I felt like that was the headspace I was in that day.

For some reason instead of thinking about the character and the scene, I had let myself get into the “I really want to book this job” mindset.  I was fixated on it, and that never bodes well.  Things that don’t usually affect me started to creep in and my monkey brain started to have a party, the vulture on my shoulder started squawking, and before I knew it, I was having that weird experience where I was outside myself watching instead of an active participant in the moment.  Despite all of this, I applaud myself for still doing a good job even though I felt scattered, but it did take me a couple of days to dissect what worked, what didn’t, and what I need to do next time I get into this little cycle so I can stop it before I starts,

In part two of Chris Evans’ interview for the new web series “Becoming,” he talks a lot about the fact that when his mind starts spinning out of control, he literally says “shhhhh” to himself.  That’s it. “Shhhhh.”  For some reason this really hit home for me.

I have my affirmations that I do on a regular basis, and a myriad of other tips and tricks to settle me down when nerves (aka. excitement without the breath) start to rear their trickster little heads, but there is something so simple about just “shhhh.”  The whole idea around taking that moment is just to calm down, slow down, see the world as it really is, breathe, and move forward.

So even in this moment, I’m saying “shhhhhh” to any doubts I have in my head, following it up with some great affirmations, and moving on.  Thank you Chris Evans.  I have a feeling that one little word is going to do me a world of difference.

Until next time,

#xoxo hels

tweet me at: @helslevy

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