#RealDeal: Living on both ends of the spectrum (The "fun" side of manic depression‏)

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Brandon. We started talking on the Facebook not too long ago, and lemme tell you, this guy can throw in quite the few kneeslappers in his emails. Yep, see Brandon is a comedian who is here today to tell you the real deal on what it's like being "on the circuit." I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT BRANDON!!! </editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @BrandonComedy

When I’m not chronically depressed or sleeping, I sometimes get visited by mania. Wikipedia will tell you that mania is a state of abnormally elevated or irritable mood, arousal, and/or energy levels

That sounds wonderful, and I’m sure it is scientifically accurate, but a more apt description of mania, at least from my experience is “every bad idea sounds like a good idea, and every mediocre idea becomes THE BEST IDEA EVER.” 

Recently I went on a* date with a young lady, as I’m wont to do, and it went amazingly well. THEN we were both snowed in on opposite sides of town, with varying illnesses, but we were texting and still enthusiastic about each other. Mania is the ear-splitting voice that convinced me that the BEST course of action to persuade this girl to be excited about me, us, and our future relationship** was to write her a one page single spaced letter, spray it with my cologne (Obsession for men, a delightfully uncomfortable coincidence), and then MAIL IT TO HER HOUSE. That’s right, after ONE date, I decided that the most logical course of action was to go 19th century and involve the postal service. 

This young lady has decided to (correctly) not return my texts. But as a rational person I can’t blame her! Literally every friend I spoke with about this letter aside from maybe one or two said a variation of “hey, don’t send that to her if you ever want to see her again,” but the booming voice of mania was like “HEY, THEY DON’T GET IT. THIS GIRL WILL APPRECIATE THE GENUINE AND SINCERE EFFORT YOU’VE JUST MADE, SHE WILL RESPOND BY ALLOWING YOU ACCESS TO HER NETHERS, AND INITIATE A LONG TERM RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU!” Spoiler alert, my friends were all correct. What I thought was a nice gesture was probably interpreted as creepy. No one mails anything if they don’t have to, especially to girls who were otherwise interested, just sick and on the other side of town.

But that’s mania. Mania convinced me that after making people laugh at a party 4 years ago, I would be the best stand-up comedian of all time (pending). Mania is interesting, in that it complements my depression so perfectly. When I’m depressed, you can’t convince me that a shittier person exists than myself. When I’m manic, I see it as a genuine joy to be me. I see everyone I meet as lucky for getting to know this wonderful person (me). 

I don’t get to pick my mood each morning. Sometimes I start my day, and by minute 8 I know it’s going to be a shit day, but lately I’ve been able to communicate my reality and my life to people I never thought I’d share my headspace with, and things are getting better. Life is better when you’re honest, and honesty starts with yourself.

Thank you for letting me also be honest with you,
Brandon

P.S. Don’t write girls letters after the first date. It doesn’t make any sense, and you probably won’t talk to that girl again.

*One, this is important.

** I should stress she was already excited or whatever about “us” although at the time, there was no us. Literally having any level of patience, beyond that of a child, would have dramatically changed the situation.

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