#RealDeal: Hi, my name is Ken and I am no longer "that guy"

This past weekend TNTML hosted their very first ever social dynamics workshop and it was a MASSIVE success!! Our resident social dynamics expert @redolpho and I took guys and gave them not only the basics on human interaction but we then took them in the field to 4 different types of bars and had them open different groups of men and women. 

It literally brought a tear to my eye watching these guys grow and KILLLLLLLLLLL it by the end of the evening. The changes in their confidence and overall attitude were IMMEDIATE!!! 

I asked one of the students to write about his experience from a very honest and real perspective on what he was able to take from the class. 

I have only one thing left to say ... HIT IT "KEN"!!! 

I’ve forever been the guy who avoids eye contact in halls.  If I know I’m going to cross paths with someone, I’d immediately grab my phone and pretend to not notice to avoid that weird hello.  Combine that with my shyness around women and you had a laughably awkward guy whose social skills forced him into lonerland.  Finally tired of being “that guy,” I pursued @JenFriel and @Redolpho’s Social Dynamics workshop, unsure of what to expect.  Though I was committed to improving myself, I had natural reservations – those were squashed immediately.  Before the class, I had never randomly approached a woman in my life; by the end of the night, I was talking to groups of attractive women all across the LA bar scene, thoroughly enjoying interactions I would have never had the courage to pursue.  What’s more is that those around me enjoyed it – not only did I learn how to approach others, but how to keep them engaged.  It was an eye-opening experience, and one that has already benefited me in friendships, relationships, and business.  I highly recommend Jen and Redolpho’s teachings to anyone looking to improve their human interactions, whether you’re the guy with no friends or Rico Suave - even socialites could benefit from these lessons.  

This isn't a class on "how to bed women, or how to pick up chicks" it's more a 101 of what makes people tick and understanding and owning your OWN confidence and awesome!! We teach you the basics then take YOU in the field and show you how it's done all while standing side by side with you. The classes are VERY intimate and you'll get a lot of 1 on 1 attention. 

Looking forward to seeing more of you this weekend!! 

#thatisall

Join Eric and Jen for their social dynamics workshop in LA on August 18th!

Click here for more info

#NerdsUnite: Epic Rejection Fail

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Eric. He is a MAASSTTEERRR social dynamics expert that will be talking about his experiences in the field from both an expert, and experience perspective. He's not just saying "this is how to get the girl" he's here to share his actual life stories and lessons learned from them. I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT ERIC !!</editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @Redolpho

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, no one bats 1000 in social dynamics. In an interview with Howard Stern, Neil Strauss was asked if all the women he dated were the metaphorical 10 and his answer was simply no. Some were but many were not. The same goes for approaches, so go well and some do not. This story is the most memorably epic pick up shut down I have ever experienced. 

It had been about six months since I started my journey in social dynamics and I had been reading everything that I could get my hands on. I was starting to get the hang of the whole process and had started changing things in my life like my workout routine and wardrobe. I had gotten past using canned material and started internalizing my skills. 

Two of my close friends from San Diego had come to visit and we made our way to the 2nd street bars in Long Beach. My change in attire and presence was becoming apparent and I was getting looks in the bar. My friend pointed out to me that there were a few girls looking my way so I thought it was time to start working the room. After a few small conversations with groups around the bar I spotted four girls talking amongst themselves and decided to move in. They were standing directly behind me so I asked my friends to give me a little shove. He did, and I nudged one of the girls that standing behind me.

When this happened I turned around and after jovially apologizing for bumping into her I said hi to the rest of the group. I commented on something that one of girls was wearing and transitioned into an open-ended question. The girls seemed mildly entertained and continued conversing with me and themselves.

Enter the moment of awkward silence. The conversation dropped off drastically and there was 15 seconds of dead space, apparently that was all it took. I tried to reinvigorate the conversation but it was dead and I was about to get shut out. One or two of the girls gave one word answers to my questions and then I watched as they all gave each other “the signal”.

Apparently girls plan these kind of things and this group was particularly prepared for unwanted conversation. All the girls looked at each other in the eye and reached in their purses. In the middle of the bar they each pulled out a pair of sunglasses and put them on. If that wasn’t enough of a signal they then huddled together, meeting shoulder to shoulder to physically shut me out. I was so shocked by what had just happened that the only reaction I could muster was to laugh and stand there in awe for a good 30 seconds. Did what I think just happened really just happen? It indeed had and when I came to I turn around and joined my friends who were laughing hysterically.

All was not lost though, at this point in my development I had learned to let things like this go and I found it kind of amusing. There is a lesson to be learned here and that is that you really have to not give a fuck when this type of thing happens, just let it go. Not more than 10 minutes later I made extended eye contact with a girl across the bar. I quickly moved in and that interaction went exceedingly better. We kissed at the bar and she invited me back for a drink at her house after the bar closed. I later found out that she was a biter and had just gotten out of a long relationship. When I woke up the next morning I realized how recent that relationship had ended as evidenced by all the pictures of her and her ex that were still on the walls, like every wall. All's well the ends well.

#thatisall

If you’d like to share your stories please feel free to tweet me at @redolpho or email me at eric dot rudolph dot carrillo at gmail dot com

Join Eric and Jen for their social dynamics workshop in LA on August 11th!

Click here for more info

#NerdsUnite: Social Dynamics Workshop August 11th

After becoming this accidental expert in dating, it is now my life's work to take what I have learned in the field and help nerdy guys get the girl. We're all super smart, and talented, yet what makes us so successful in our professional lives no doubt impedes us in our love lives. 

I've talked about this before that dating has an ebb and flow - and courtship is TRULY an art ... but now I'm putting my money where my mouth is and finally structuring a workshop. 

I am SO FREAKING EXCITED to announce this .... but in 17 days Talk Nerdy To Me, Lover will be throwing its first ever social dynamics workshop. 

I found a calling last year when I worked in the field with Neil Strauss and between myself, and our resident social dynamics expert @Redolopho we really want to help you guys take things to another level.

We've been privately working with some students for the last few months and here is what some of them have said ... 

Student A: 30 years old, never had a girlfriend. 

After Eric coached me for a week, I used his advice on a smokin' hot girl I met for the first time in class and she INSTANTLY started going crazy over me. She actually asked when she could see me again without me saying ANYTHING about meeting up! Now every time I text her, she texts me back, gushing with praise- just like I used to do to women I didn't have a chance with.

I'm a 5'8", 270 lb high-functioning autistic with seborrheic dermatitis, no car, no college degree, and working 10 hours a week at minimum wage. A year ago, I thought I was going to die a virgin- but after taking Eric's advice for just 7 days, I got a solid 8.5 eating out of my hand.

Did I mention that this was all without meeting Eric face-to-face or even talking on the phone? We only talked over Facebook chat for a half hour or so a day.

Student B: 24 years old. Sad Puppy Dog Eyes from Mirror Post

Jen tends to have the most original ideas in the world. Quite possibly the last of the original ideas to be had if you think about it. When she posted about a reversed date where she asks me about my dating life in order to help me better myself, I was intensely intrigued. I immediately contacted her and set up an “appointment” for this wondrous experiment. I am the case of the “sad puppy dog eyes”.

Since our meeting, I have dived into Neil Strauss’s Rules of the Game, started intensely looking & calling for my own place, put myself out there a bit more, and most of all, found a girl that I THOUGHT was really into me. Long story, short: I turned out to be a rebound and I was blinded by my own mind. I am an over thinker, and I’ve definitely learned my lesson; the mind can really fuck you harder than Chris Nolan’s Inception. However, my mind ran rampant constantly until last night.

The Talk Nerdy To Me Lover’s talk show was last night. Unfortunately, I didn’t go due to a previous engagement. I did go to the after party at Barney’s Beanery in good ol’ West Hollywood. After quickly relaying a synopsis of my recent girlfriend after Jen and my meeting, she felt compelled to introduce me to THE social dynamics expert: Eric Carrillo. This guy is fucking brilliant beyond belief. He not only broke down what my situation was without me fully completing my description, but he was able to go into detail effectively. I explained to him about my current ordeal with the girl who had used me as a rebound: she had a void and she saw certain similarities in me that her ex-fiance had (they were engaged for 2 years and she is 19 now… yeah) and attempted to fill that void with me. It seemed to work for her for at least 3 ½ weeks… then disaster struck when she realized I was not that much like her ex at all and was someone else with different personality qualities: being nice, honest, and liking her a lot. Since this was my first time experiencing this, I went crazy trying to figure out what was wrong. I had done some soul searching to put my mind at ease… but no dice. It wasn’t until I had this ridiculously relaxing talk with Eric that it made perfect sense to me. I was a rebound. Plain and simple. But, what next? Eric simply said, “Just let it go.” Within the realm of social interaction, letting something go should be relatively easygoing because all you need is time, right? Time heals all they say. But there was something soothing about how Eric delivered it to me. It was easy to hear and understand. He put it in a way that made me feel like he knew exactly what I had just gone through. I cannot thank him enough. Thanks a trillion Eric! 

How amazing is that? Social dynamics simply opens your eyes, please understand this isn't a PUA (pick up artist) community event - it's just two nerdy peeps with a WHOOLLLLEEE lotta expertise that want to share it with you guys. 

When: Saturday August 11

Time: Afternoon-Evening

Cost: $250

I don't want to publicly disclose where the event is going to be held to make sure you guys remain anonymous in the process, but the event will be held in Los Angeles. 

You will have both of us at the workshop - and we are looking to have this be an ongoing thing so even if you can't make the first one feel free to still email and we will add you to the list for updates. 

Some areas we will be covering include: 

1) How to approach a girl in a non-traditional setting

2) Attraction basics 

3) How to approach a female through social media

... and much much more. 

We're going to keep the classes small and intimate, but the majority of this will be field work. We'll teach you guys the bare bones basics but then we're going to get your butts out in the field and help you guys out IRL. This ain't yo mama's workshop!! =) 

I'm extremely humbled to be of service, and I ABSOLUTELY cannot wait for this. Eric and I are at your service nerderinos!! Let's experience some more personal growth!! 

To sign up email: JenFriel at TalkNerdyToMeLover d c (or if you'd like more info)

#YAYLIFE