#NerdsUnite: Ask That Nerdy Chick (how do I start a blog?)

It is my goal for 2013 to take a lot of my weird and wonky experiences as a lifecaster and help nerdy peeps out by providing a frank (not shirley) and honest answer to some weird and potentially random questions you may have about life. 

Here is a question I got on Facebook the other day ... 

First off, thanks for reading and thanks for reaching out. 

Wow, that's definitely a unique online dating experience, but I'd take it as a blessing. 

I facebook stalked you after getting your message, and you are unique and you have this AWESOMELY quirky yet classic beauty look about you. 

I like to think of these people that come into our lives as "little blessings." You obvi weren't meant to date this guy, but he was "on your path" to wake you up. He spoke your truth in a VERY blunt manner. It shook you, you became offended, but that was just coming from a place of ego. 

"Who is this guy to tell me this, and I'm not a client of his. blah blah blah" 

Your ego in that sentence is saying, how dare this person say exactly what I've been feeling and point out this flaw to me on a date. I didn't sign up for this!! Go to hell!!! 

His timing and delivery was less than stellar but what an INCREDIBLE blessing to come your way. This is obviously something you were interested in, and he woke you up to that fact!! 

Everything is going digital. Period end of sentence. 

The quicker you realize this and start building out your online presence the better it is in general. What's the first thing employers/ dates/ whatever do now when they want to find out about you? They don't ask around, they go to their computer and google (or Facebook stalk you). This is just a period end of sentence of this new world we are walking into. 

As far as starting a blog is concerned it takes an ENORMOUS amount of work if you want it to become a business. 

I'm not even kidding you when I say that, if I personally knew what I was getting into there was NO WAY I would have spent the last 3 years living the way that I have. I had no idea it was going to be this massive rabbit hole that I'm still exploring and playing in, but I am grateful. 

I would suggest though starting some sort of blogging even to just get your voice out there. It's again, a great way for employers to see how serious you are about any given topic and how knowledgeable you are on it. 

I'd suggest starting with a tumblr account. You can buy a personalized domain for $10 and redirect the URL directly to a free account on tumblr. 

Pick a template that suits your personality and suits what you are going to be talking about, and you're good to go! 

If you're super serious about becoming a writer or getting your stuff out there more, I'd reach out to some sites and ask if you can guest post. (We LOVE that here on TNTML, btw. Email: JenFriel at TalkNerdyToMeLover d c) 

That's a great way to work with the grain and tap into an already established audience. Ask them to link back to your blog, and to your twitter account (which you should create if you don't have one already). 

Don't focus so much at first on "community management/ development" focus on you, and focus on developing your voice. The rest will naturally unfold. 

So, here are my final questions. Who are you? What do you have to say? 

Thanks for reading!! Keep me posted on your progress xoxo

Got a question? Drop me an email! JenFriel at TalkNerdyToMeLover dot com

ORRRRR you can message me on Facebook and if it's within 140 characters on the twitter!

Best of luck out there nerds!!

xoxo <3 @JenFriel

#Randombling: That Nerdy Chick (here's to the night)

Randombling: A 5 minute long unedited random stream of consciousness produced by a nerd for nerds.

#nowplaying: Eve 6 - Here's to the night

Hi friends. 

So, this was a pretty big week for me on a lot of levels. 

1) I had a friend staying with me all week, @internetsabrina, and she might be one of my new favorite people ever. It's been SO fun having someone to play with around the house and out and about. I love love love the idea of living and co-working together. Co-working spaces are the bomb, obvi, but there is another level of intimacy and connection you can have with someone when you're in the same field as them AND you have a Jersey Shore and Ru-Paul Drag Race viewing party before your first cup of coffee. It's again, this jarring reminder of how important intimate relationships are in general. I'm SUPER proud to say as well that I TREMENDOUSLY built out my friendships in the last few months. I actually talk to people on the phone now, and make.an.effort. to talk to people and not just catch up with them in social media. So much of my job is to be out and about meeting new people, so it's genuinely hard to allocate even MORE time to the personal stuff, but again, it's important and my happiness depends on it. 

2) I'm not sure "where I am at" dating wise. I'm so confused right now. I'm dating all these super fancy pants dudes that are flying me around, taking me to nice dinners, I'm staying in the poshest hotels - and it can still be like watching paint dry. I had a REALLY great first date a few weeks back, and then the dude just dropped off the face of the planet. I TOTALLY felt sparks with that guy, yet like with the 103 dates in 9 months, did I only feel the sparks because he too is emotionally unavailable? What the fuck does that even really mean?!? It's like my brain censors are in reverse. What I recognize as being hot is actually cold. Every.single.time. I get burned because of it. This all comes back to self, like everything in life, but I'm just going to cool my jets a bit. I need to stop seeking a relationship and instead grow and cultivate intimacy first. This, for a workaholic, is never easy but who knows. 

3) Speaking of workaholic, I have a new manager who is a POWERHOUSE. Holy fucking shit, this dude scares the shit out of me in every awesome way ever. We became friends on Facebook a while back, and like with everyone, I snooped and checked him out. Very quickly I found out he was super fancy pants.

Flashforward to just a few weeks ago, I was seeking advice on what my next career step should be. I asked if I could talk to him for just a few minutes to pick his brain, and then the next morning we talked for about a half an hour and he gave me a ton of great advice.

Everyone keeps telling you you're wonderful, he said, but what are they all doing about it?

I know, I said. I then asked him to connect me with anyone he thought could help, and after a few minutes he responded back via Facebook saying he wanted to meet with me.

Our meeting was just last Tuesday and by the end of it I was lightheaded in the best way ever. This guy knows his shit, and already had two TV show ideas for me by the end of it. This is what you're already doing, he said. This is already on the table, but to do this we have to be in a COMPLETELY co-dependent relationship. If you break up with your boyfriend, you tell him and then call me. Get it?

I smiled, and realized we were going to get along quite well. It's going to be a hard adjustment getting used to having someone else inside my brain, but this guy has proven himself EVEN BEFORE I SIGNED THE CONTRACT!!! I already have meetings set up, and he's already talked to a bunch of different production companies about what I want to do. That's more than I've gotten done in the last year, even WITH all the pitching we've been doing to the networks for the first scripted TV show. It's fucking nuts, man, and all a crap shoot. Right place, right time, right network. Just gotta keep on hustling and establish out the right team. This.Guy.Was.My.Missing.Link. 

I've had various management for the last 10 years and I've never seen anything like this dude.

We shall see ... 

4) My high school reunion is in exactly one week. It's such a strange, bittersweet process to experience. On the one hand, it's a definite chapter closing. I no longer have family in CT and genuinely have no reason to ever go back. As stated in a previous post, my graduation from high school was the hands down worst day of my life. I wasn't even bullied in school, I was stalked, and that entire process was horrid. I have a lifetime restraining order against the four girls, but I just need for my own psyche to put a period at the end of this sentence and wish everyone well. I don't wish a single person ill, even the stalkers (although if any of them do show I will be enforcing the order), I just want to be done done done with all of this. I never fit in in CT so I moved to LA almost 9 years ago and now I'm doing damn well for myself. I don't need to prove my worth or anything to anyone (nor will anyone even care since we are all such insular beings) ... I'm more or less just looking for a solid party with these people, and then I peace out Sunday to head to Colorado. 

I'm as usual very confused. I have a series of next doable actions in front of me based on stuff my new manager wants me doing (which is GREAT for me because my brain gets so over-stimulated on so many shiny things and then I end up getting nothing done). I just need to let go and let the process take me over. It's going to be scary, but I really really know my shit and I'm a great writer and producer. Now with such a powerhouse in entertainment in my corner, shits gonna get dooonnnnneeeeee. 

I'm grateful. Very very very grateful. 

Bring it, Hall High class of 2002!! Stoked to see those faces!! =) 

#love

Oh yeah and ... 

Click the screenshot to comment on Facebook

#Randombling: That Nerdy Chick

Randombling: A 5 minute long unedited random stream of consciousness produced by a nerd for nerds.

#nowplaying: Natalie Imbruglia - Torn

Wow. What a week, what a time ... what - an everything.

First off, my trip to Seattle is a go! Currently dealing with the financial peeps in planning, and what it's going to look like - but it's EFFING RAD man!! I'm going to be on an amtrak all the way up the coast for 31 hours - which is GREAT because I totally need to get the proposal to my lit agent on "A Nerd's Guide to Being Unapologetically Awesome." Book proposals are superly duperly long, but fortunately everything in my life is documented online - so a lot of the research the publisher is going to require is actually already done and documented since I have a shit ton of testimonials and what not already in writing. Pretty grateful for that, every bit helps.

But yah man, I'm coming to Seattle!!! So friggen excited!! It's #2 on my must see in the US! (#1 is going anywhere in the state of Hawaii. Never been before, just needs to happen at some point.)

Will make a formal announcement once everything is booked, but it'll be next week. SO. FREAKING. EXCITED!!

On a personal note, the whole no casual sex thing has been a mighty dose of everything healthy in my life. I'm pretty much the most excited person to be alive on this planet - so I can't help but also be the horniest person on the planet as well (since excitement travels everywhere ::wink wink::). I'm naturally not predisposed to want to have intimate relationships with people, but I have been opening myself up more and more and it feels damn good. (But not opening myself up TOO much either - a nice balance.) I've been dating this one duderino for a few months now. I can't talk about it since it hiccups the natural ebb and flow of dating but it's going incredibly slow which for me is GREAT. I'm still dating on OKC to keep my sanity (bitches go crazy when they like a boy - always. always. always. keep dating to not go psychotic). But I have to admit, sex has DEFINITELY changed. It's becoming less of a "bone" and more of a connection. I know I know this is the way life SHOULD be - but have you read how I lost my viriginity? I'm very much a matter of fact person, and INCREDIBLY analytical. It makes me a shark in business, but cold in my personal life. Guys have trouble figuring out how they can be a part of my life. They want to be the protector and be the provider - and here I am saying I can throw a punch, take a punch, fire a gun, wield a knife, and oh yeah! I run my own business. There has to be a give and take in there somewhere otherwise I emasculate the men. I guess I'm just so used to taking care of myself, and going after what I want, again great in business, shitty in your personal life. Need to be the chick, Friel - you need to be the chick.

It's hilarious too, because I complain and complain how dudes don't step up to the plate and take the lead, but maybe it's me that doesn't even give them the chance. OOOOHHHH how I am starting to see the light. Oh yes, it's there.

Be the chick.

Be the chick.

Be the chick.

Professionally speaking, things are going GREAT! Getting the sales team up on their legs and ready to start going after some leads. It's crazy adding more to my plate helping manage everyone - but it's gotta get done, and no one said starting a business was easy. I'm grateful to at least now have office space however so I can take a break.

OMMMGGGGGGGG I stayed in ALL weekend and slept, and lounged around. Felt GREAT! Totally took a me-weekend. Totally needed it.

Oh! and my leg is doing better after my epic wipe out.

It went from looking like I got hit by a car to now just a gnarly case of road rash. Not too shabby!! I kinda feel like a leopard. I wouldn't be mad at a leg tattoo - could be pretty rad!

All in all, lots going on - as usual, but from the depths of my everything thank you all so so so so SOOOOOO much for the emails, tweets, comments, posts, etc. You all make. my. life.

It's crazy how all this time I thought I was alone with all these weird and random life experience, only to find out that by posting on it - others would just find me! It's GREAT! Keep it up nerds!! I love love love LOVE IT!!!

Peace love and lollipops to all!! Many blessings! And if you ever want to find me you can ...

email: jenfriel at talknerdytomelover d c

Facebook: Facebook.com/JenFriel

Twitter: Twitter.com/JenFriel

#YAYLIFE

Oh, and if you want a sneak peek on what the book is going to be about, have a listen to the lecture I gave at Cal State Fullerton. You can just put it on in the background or whatevs. It's pretty long, but peeps dug it. YAY!!

#Randombling: That Nerdy Chick

Randombling: A 5 minute long unedited random stream of consciousness produced by a nerd for nerds.

#nowplaying: Shake it out - Florence and the Machine

Well HELLOOOOOO sexy lover faces. How are you all doing today? Good? Yeah? I thought I saw a smile on that face!!

So, we had our first big announcement this week courtesy of TNTML's Senior Advisor Mr. Ben Parr.

Really really really rad dude, and talk about the most humbling thing ever to have someone you respect so so so much come on board to help you with your business. It's like, FOR REAL?!?! Very very very humbling. My value add is in team building, and trend spotting. Structuring a business is not my cup of tea - but that's where Ben comes in and is helping me out. (For a stake in the company of course, you HAVE TO make things worth people's time.)

I'm just stoked for life, man. You have to understand it still shocks me every.single.day. that all of this actually worked. Following your passions ... following your dream ... becoming a living cliche - you really can make things happen by using social media, and by having a kind heart and a pure soul. I don't lie, I don't cheat, and I DEFINITELY don't steal - and yet nothing but AH-MAZING things have happened and have blessed this community.

I say all of the time that this is the GREATEST time to be alive, but I really can't stress that enough. We're going through a revolution of sorts right now, and it's rooted in technology. One person can have a voice, one person can have an opinion, one person can express said opinion, build a following, and have that single voice be amplified into something great. Do you know how many people told me I was bat shit for doing what I did? Do you know how many of my friends and even my family stopped talking to me for extended periods of time? I physically couldn't stop because this website was the one thing in life that made me happy. When you spend 24 years of your life in a depression and in a negative state of consciousness, happiness has a different value add. I will never and I mean NEEVVVERRRR do something that makes me unhappy. After spending 2 years in bliss now and seeing HOW DIFFERENT life can truly be - it's too much of a sacrifice to spend even .25 seconds doing something that I don't enjoy.

I am really really really proud of this community, I am completely humbled by the team now behind us, and I am ready now more than ever to get shit done.

I am 26 now running a new media production company with an unscripted show in development, a scripted show in development, a book deal, and a website I built with my bare hands just shy of the top 100,000 on the net. That took me two years to do and it all came very naturally through a series of at the time "unimportant/ insignificant" decisions. It just felt right, man. Starting a site felt right! It didn't have to make sense, it just felt good. What feels good to you today? Every. Single. Day. is another chance you have to turn it all around. Every SECOND of every day. Mine happened around 9pm on November 3, 2009. What's going to happen for you today, October 28th at ... ::insert the time in your time zone here:: ... just fucking do it, man. The time is now. The time is now. The time is now. Get off your ass, let go of your fears - AND JUST DO IT!!!!

HAHA oh goodness I get too excited sometimes. On another note, we have a LOT of events coming up!

First up, I will be tweeting live from the Playboy Mansion tomorrow night. DUDDESSSS!! So so so excited! I need to get my DRANK on something fierce. I love Playboy. I've been doing to their parties for almost 6 years now, and the people there are like family. No catty girls, just half naked people running around having the time of their lives. It's AHHH-MAZZINNNGG!!! The service can be a bit spotty on the grounds, but I will be tweeting as much as possible during the night, and uploading pics on WhoSay.

Here's a vid from last year ...

I'll post my costume as well tomorrow. It's going to be super duper sch-mexy. I'm digging feeling like a girl again courtesy of my fancy shoes from Blowfish.

OH OH and THENNNNN ... on Monday, I will be speaking on a nerdy panel at the Nerdist Theater here in LA ...

Going to be SOOO RAD!!! If you live in LA come check it out!!

OH OH AND OHH!! We ALSO have the Nerd Herd on the 5th, TNTML's 2nd anniversary party. That's going to go down at the Brass Monkey at 8pm. (Click here for more info)

Come by and meet your favorite writers on the site, and kick it with some karaoke!!! Going to be a BLAASSTT!!! Super stoked for that, and super stoked for life in general, man.

From the depths of my soul thank you all SOOOOOO much for the emails, comments, tweets, love - everything. I am INCREDIBLY grateful. Thank you thank you thank you - I still can't believe it all worked, but I'm just gonna go with it.

#dowhatyouloveALWAYS

#Randombling: That Nerdy Chick

Randombling: A 5 minute long unedited random stream of consciousness produced by a nerd for nerds.

#nowplaying: Blinding - Florence and the Machine

A hoi hoi mateys ... lots o good news kickin round. First off, have a SUPER big week. Like crazy super big. On Tuesday, I meet with this big agency to discuss representation for the brand. Huge huge huge deal. It's going to help me switch more into creative mode, so I can focus more on that rather than feeding the ad sales pipeline. I just need help taking this to another level. I know what we're doing is working, clearly, I'm not in a ditch yet - but I recognize that I need more hands on the deck.

THENNNNNNN, I'm meeting also this week with an uber uber uber financial guru. I need to start setting things up for this site as a small business, so I'm going to take a crash course on it. Dudes, this guy is so so so so soooooooooo highy regarded in his field ... ahmazing and totally humbling that he wants to meet. So fucking flattered, man.

So yeah - the biz side of things could not be more on fire. There's a lot that I want to start doing to expand this brand, but I need to set things up for that. It's terribly exciting - and only 5% stressful hahaha. Life is ... right here. Saying, what's up! Things are just clicking effortlessly - it is BLOWING.MY.MIND. The laws of attraction have like a 30 second return manifestation. Freaking me out, but I'm going to stop questioning it and just go with it and say prayers of gratitude.

It's been a great couple of weeks, but incredibly stressful as well. I just finished post production on the TV show I was filming back east. It was weird being a producer on it as well. I fucking loved that part ... but it takes a different part of my brain, and when I'm actually filming I can't do both producer and talent at the same time. It's literally a switch in my noggin - I just have to manage that part better. Creatively I'm always a whackadoodle noodle, but that's not a producers job, that's the talent. The producer has to get releases signed, scout locations ... etc. etc. etc. I love it, don't get me wrong - but I learned a LOT of what not to do for season one hahahaha. Fuccckkkkkkk me, man. Anywho, we find out in a couple weeks about season 2 and 3. If we get a thumbs up on it, they wanna do them back to back which will be fun, and easier for me since I have travel required. It'll put me back east for like a month tho, but we shall see. One bite of the elephant at a time.

On the TNTML pilot note, we're still movin and groovin. The suits want to sell it this cycle of buying, so that's exciting. They scrapped the first script and are making it more autobiographical. I'm bummed we didn't get the showrunner that I wanted, but whatevs! These people know what they are doing, and I'm just along for the ride. Dude, my writing idol knows my name - I can die now. It's exciting, but also weird at the same time. Dudes, TV shows are such a crap shoot. It's timing, it's the right team - it's nuts. It's a weird, weird, weird, industry. I'm not mad at it, but I do find it fascinating.

Also, I start writing my first book this week. That is pretty much the trippiest thing that has ever happened to me. Even when I filled out my google plus profile I put Lifecaster/ Author. I'm gonna be a fucking author, man. Didn't even see that one coming - but it's still next doable actions, and going to be a very big project. I'm just stoked and clearly honored to be doing it. It's going to make it easier for me to explain to you all too how to be a personal brand and do more of what has worked. It's also going to give the brand TREMENDOUS credibility to be like oh, yep, I wrote the book on that ... literally. Credibility is the foundation for brands, so this is ... HUGE!

I could not be more honored and humbled. Thank you For Dummies - this is all so unbelievable.

That's whats up. I'm stressed ... I'm excited ... I'm humbled ... I'm ready ... and today I'm going to nap. Gotta rest up baby, this is going to be a FUN week!!! Yayyyyy LIFFEEEE!!! 

#bringit

Oh and PS. I MET ANN SPADE YESTERDAY!!!!!! GIRL CRUSH! GIRL CRUSH! GIRL CRUSH!!

If you guys ever have questions or anything please please please do not hesitate to email me. I read everything, and will 100% respond. If for whatever reason you haven't heard back from me, I might have read it too fast or not starred it in my inbox - just resend it, and yell at me so I can apologize haha. And if you do resend it and I still don't reply, I'm sure it was for something weird. Quit being weird.

JenFriel at TalkNerdyToMeLover dot com

All my love and all my heart TNTML. Thank you for changing my life. xoxoxoxxoxoxxoxoxoxo