#Adventures in Randomness and Rock & Roll w @leah_cevoli
Sunday, February 3, 2013 at 9:00AM<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Leah. She's pretty rad and has an INCREDIBLY random life. Like, no - for reals ... did you know she has an obsession with vampires, psychics, and tarot card readers ... and she had more sex as a teenager than in her 30s ... anddddd she even had two ex boyfriends die violently - one from a heroin overdose, and the other was murdered. Holy moly roli poli oli - that shit be cray cray. Either way, she's now here to write about her life, love, and all things nerd. I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT LEAH!! </editorsnote>
#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @Leah_Cevoli
Last week I put a facebook status up that read:
“Gentlemen, there's a way to have "sleepovers" with a friend and keep things cool and respectful, and then there's a way to be a complete douche. #IfTheShoeFitsWearIt Namaste.”
Now, most of my friends just clicked like, or said Amen or something to that sort. Those that really know me know that I’ll never dish details on Facebook, but I will certainly say enough so that the parties involved know what I’m talking about. In this particular case, there’s a guy I’ve been “seeing” for lack of a better word since about July. By seeing, I mean we’ve had about ½ a dozen sleepovers in the summertime before I started travelling. It was always a very nice sleepover usually involving him cooking dinner and breakfast as well, but we’ve never done much hanging out in public, and when we do it’s casual, with mutual friends, who may or may not know about our sleepovers. I’ve been out of town for about 7 months, and haven’t heard much from him until Christmas. He reached out to me and we had a really nice text conversation on Xmas evening.
A few weeks ago, I was in LA for 4 days, and we both made it a priority to see each other. He picked me up in the part of town that I was staying in and we had dinner and caught up. During dinner, he told me that even though he hasn’t been in touch, or rarely ever comments online or even clicks like, that he has in fact been following much of my journey, and gave examples to show that it was true. It was nice to know that he’d been paying attention, but there’s just something about a simple “like” that shows ya, “Hey, I’m here,” you know what I mean? Anyways after dinner, I was set to be dropped off, and he suggested it’d be nice for me to grab my car and come back down to his neck of the woods, and he’d make breakfast in the morning. So I did.
It’s been about 3 weeks, and I haven’t heard a word from him, as is usual. But last week, I noticed that he was in NEW YORK! You know NEW YORK, a city I’m in A LOT these days, a city that’s a $10 bus ride for me from Philly… not only did he not mention a single word about this visit to NY from LA, but there were multiple posts tagged, blogs, videos, and photos of himself with a girl. Now, you see, it’s not the photos with the girl that bothered me, because we are not an official couple, what bothered me is that well A) he didn’t even mention the trip when I was at his house the week before, and B) I began to notice that he never ever accepts any tags that I put up with photos of us, and he’s never ever shared my blogs or videos, even the ones that have included him in them! And here's a girl in NY that seems to do a lot of the same things that I do as far as blogging and vlogging, and he's pimping her shit like crazy!
I don’t need to be the only women in your life, but show me the same respect and friendship that you show others. And it’s not that, he doesn’t have TONS of female friends, and travels to conventions and takes pix with TONS of beautiful girls, cause he does. So exactly what would one or two photos with me, popping up once in awhile show? Nothing really, it would just look like another female friend… so why does it seem like I’m the only one that gets shut out? A simple. “He’s just not that into you.” Right, but more so. He’s being a total douche and inconsiderate of someone that was a friend and could still be a friend with or without the sleepovers, and is now pretty pissed off about it all.
Now, a very interesting thing happened when I put up that status. “Gentlemen, there's a way to have "sleepovers" with a friend and keep things cool and respectful, and then there's a way to be a complete douche. #IfTheShoeFitsWearIt Namaste.” A few dudes chimed in seeming to assume that I had slept with someone the night before, sort of a one-night stand and was now being ignored or something. One dude even went so far as to talk about slut-shaming, and how it’s a shame that if a girl wants to “lead that life-style” guys will talk about her behind her back but a guy gets congratulated for it. I explained to this guy that although I may have hung out with that type of guy as a teenager (him included), I don’t have that sort of man in my life anymore, and would never consider spending any time with a man that uses the word slut freely to describe a woman who has mature, consenting, adult sex. He went on to basically say, well that’s nice that you can live that “lifestyle”, but it probably happens behind your back and you don’t know it.
Woah. Woah. Woah!
I then explained to him that I’m not sure what “lifestyle” he’s talking about, but that I can count the number of sexual partners I've had in the last decade or so on ONE hand… but still, I’m an independent woman who can choose to be intimate with who and when I want.
And guess what he said to that? “Oh wow, sounds like you need some good man time!”
WHAT?!
Five seconds before he was basically telling me that I was a slut, and upon hearing the truth of my frequency of sexual encounters, he then basically told me I needed to get some.
Dear Universe- I would like to meet my other half. Someone equivalent and complimentary to me for adventures, fun times, stimulating conversations, creative endeavors, and lots and lots of good sex.
Thank you.
Reader Comments