#FoodForThought: The Adventures of Fanny and Olive (classic)

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Fanny. No really - that is her actual name. She is a massive massive massive foodie, and would like to share with you all the adventures on all of the things she puts in her mouth. Wait, no - not like that ... I mean ... well, you know what I mean. Aw shucks, just hit it already Fanny ... </editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's Fanny Slater

in honor of talk nerdy to me lover's first live show (tomorrow night at 9:30 PM at the little modern theater on santa monica boulevard), i decided that this post should be somewhat of a tribute.  obviously, this is a food blog--and there's not really a food that screams "website-turned-kickass-stage-show"--so you'll just have to go with me here.  from the moment i met jen friel, i knew there was something special about her.  actually, it was about half an hour AFTER i met her--because for the first thirty minutes, i didn't realize she had headphones on under her hoodie and couldn't hear a word i was saying.  when you meet people that have the "it" factor, you can practically reach out and touch that magical light they have around them.  i was so honored to be asked anytime jen needed an extra hand or face on camera, but when she asked me to be part of her incredibly successful blog--i couldn't have been more thrilled.  getting to be one of the very first five girls in the TNTML live show is going to be an experience i'll never forget.  it hasn't even happened yet, and i already know it's going to be classic.

to me, classics are everything from sixteen candles, to skip-its and pop rocks, and of course...

 

 jen friel is a one-of-a-kind classic and i'm lucky to be a part of whatever she spreads her magic onto. another irreplaceable classic--that i believe no one will disagree with me about--is a caesar salad.  they've always been a favorite of mine, but coming from a family where the salad dressings are always homemade--i can be a little picky.  nobody likes a wilted, gloppy, over-dressed salad.  especially when it comes to something so traditional like the caesar salad--the ingredients should be treated delicately and as equal members of a wonderful ensemble cast.  although i don't mind the flavor of anchovies when they're blended into a dressing at a good restaurant, they're not something i generally keep on hand unless it's olive's birthday.  the recipe that my dad originally taught me for this is pretty standard.  you can certainly add things to it and change it up as you like, but for it to be a traditional caesar dressing (minus the anchovies)--the ingredients are as follows:

-dijon mustard

-lemon juice

-egg yolk 

-worcestershire sauce

-garlic

-parmesan cheese

-cracked black pepper

-salt

-olive oil

yes, it's true.  caesar dressing doesn't HAVE to be full of mayonnaise.  there's a restaurant in raleigh where i'm from that, in my opinion, makes the best caesar salad i ever had.  a few years back, i had the opportunity to work as an intern under the executive chef and i couldn't help but ask what the secret was.  are you ready for this?

....cheetos.

just kidding!  that would be awkward.  the secret is hardly even a secret at all!  instead of using raw garlic--like most caesar dressings call for--they used ROASTED garlic.  the sweet nutty taste adds a different layer of flavor that only sticks out enough to make you to say, "what the hell makes this so good?"  for my ultimate caesar salad, other than the incorporation of roasted garlic and a touch of light sour cream or plain greek yogurt (to make it a little creamier), i'm a big fan of adding roasted capers and roasted peppers.  i learned that trick from another restaurant i used to work at.  see...who needs culinary school when you can learn all your tricks in real live kitchens!

for the dressing (this serves 2 people and makes 2 medium size caesar salads):

1. coddle one egg (no, that does not mean hug it and whisper compliments into it's shell.  run it under warm water to get it to room temperature, and then let it sit in boiling water for EXACTLY one minute, run it under cold water, crack it and put the yolk in your dressing bowl)

2. the juice of half of a lemon

3. 1 tablespoon dijon mustard

4. a few shakes of worcestershire sauce (two teaspoons maybe)

5. 1 medium minced raw garlic clove + 2 medium roasted garlic cloves (smashed and chopped)

6. cracked black pepper and salt to taste

7. 1 tablespoon fresh finely grated parmesan cheese 

8. 1-1.5 tablespoons olive oil (whisk it in until the consistency looks dressing-like)

9. optional: 1 teaspoon light sour cream or plain non-fat greek yogurt

once the dressing is done--make sure your romaine is washed, dryed, and cut to your liking.  a lot of restaurants keep the leaves whole and paint the dressing right on them.  i think this makes for a beautiful presentation--but it's a little easier to eat at home if you pre-cut your lettuce.  

never be afraid to pre-cut your food...even if someone tells you it's impolite.

...sorry...personal tangent.

 

lay out all of your ingredients...

from the bottom left going upwards: roasted chicken, homemade english muffin croutons, roasted capers, feta cheese, romaine, scratch-made dressing, parmesan for the top.

to answer your questions: 1. yes, i do add feta to my caesar salads because i love the added salty flavor. 2. yes, i'm lying.  i add feta because i'm obsessed with greek food and i put feta in my cereal.  3. yes, that was also a lie.  4. yes, i did make those croutons out of honey wheat english muffins.  (cut into squares, toss with olive oil, salt, bojangles seasoning, and parsley)  once again, if you don't have bojangles seasoning--just use paprika for the color.

it doesn't get much more classic than that.

if you're already being fancy and making a caesar salad entirely from scratch for dinner--you might as well keep the classy going.  i recommend a glass of wine.  

so does olive.

#nerdsunite

click here to check out more from Fanny! (heheheeheh her name is Fanny)

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#FoodForThought: The Adventures of Fanny and Olive (Roux)

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Fanny. No really - that is her actual name. She is a massive massive massive foodie, and would like to share with you all the adventures on all of the things she puts in her mouth. Wait, no - not like that ... I mean ... well, you know what I mean. Aw shucks, just hit it already Fanny ... </editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's Fanny Slater

when was the last time any of you watched the golden girls?  you probably have to think about it…don’t you?  well, if you’re my best friend sara—

your answer would be, “what are you talking about, i'm watching it right now.” 

well just to refresh your memory, in almost every episode there is a signature moment of recollection brought to you by the eldest character sophia.  it is always a long-winded story about her as a young woman, and each time it consistently starts out something like this: “picture this!  sicily, 1947.  a beautiful girl stands beneath a lemon tree, brushing her long golden locks…”

well, let me fill you in on my week.

picture this!  hollywood, 2011.  a young woman with dirty blonde hair and sad, droopy carolina blue eyes leans over a kitchen sink to avert scraps of chicken from getting caught in the folds of her scarf.  she reaches a greasy hand out to a clear lime-ridden bottle with a long skinny neck.  she watches half of the honey-colored liquid disappear and then pops a piece of potato in her mouth.  she swallows and then inhales heavily as she realizes that she has yet to remove her jacket or even her dark brown boots. 

well friends, i’m embarrassed to admit that this horrific visual image i’ve just painted for you illustrates the perfect picture of yours truly last night around 8:30 PM.  i knew that having a full time job would lead to long hours and less time in the kitchen, but i had no idea that i would find myself hunched over a sink shoveling store-bought roast chicken into my mouth like a homeless person who had just found the jackpot of all trashcans.  don't get me wrong, the paychecks are great--but money doesn't buy happiness.  money buys you a six pack of coronas and roasted baby potatoes from gelson's that are not meant to be eaten with your fingers.  someday when i have my own cooking show and i'm teaching the world how to caramelize red onions, all of my past bosses who ever kept me at the office past dinnertime will rue the day they made fanny slater stay late!  and i don't mean roux--the combination of equal parts flour and butter used as a thickening agent for sauces and soups.  the point of this story is not just that i've been left with no time to cook and little inspiration to create new dishes in my head.  the point is that even a foodie needs to pick up dinner once a while.  if you have the time to spend an hour and a half creating delicious masterpieces like open faced lamb burgers with homemade olive tapenade--then you absolutely should.  but if the daily grind has drained you of your creativity, then treat yourself to a hot pocket and couple of cheap beers.

i now present to you: open-faced rosemary lamb burger on toasted ciabatta with feta, homemade red onion jam, olive tapenade, and tzatziki

despite the fact that my enthusiasm for eating this week has been limited to the pint of fro-yo in my lap thanks to late nights at work and a raging sinus infection--you know that i wouldn't end my rant without leaving you a FAN--get it? that's my name--tastic recipe.  for those of you that don't follow me on twitter (SHAME ON YOU! just kidding, i literally just signed up) then you might have missed homemade lamb burger night last week.  you know...last week--before i was officially working full-time and had a pause in my day to do important things like floss my teeth and remember to wear socks.  i had been watching a lot of diners, drive-ins, and dives that week and the plethora of burgers appearing on the show began to entice the foodie part of my brain.  also known as...95% of my brain.  what's the other 5% you ask?  a complete encyclopedia of quotes and references to episodes of f.r.i.e.n.d.s.

okay, let's get down to it:

when i think of lamb, i think of succulent juicy herbaceous flavors.  in order to make that into a burger, you have to let the lamb be the star.  i used complementary flavors (they were so thoughtful!) like rosemary, garlic, and dried oregano.  i like my lamb a little on the rare side--which some people may think is crazy--so feel free to cook yours crazy to medium crazy.  in a roaring hot pan with a touch of olive oil, i seared the burger on both sides (4-5 minute per side).  once it was done and the juices were settling, i began the components for the rest of the dish.  i figured if i was going to go through the trouble of making a homemade greek burger...

i might as well go all out with the condiments.  

homemade olive tapenade: finely chop kalamata and greek-marinated green olives (you can find these at any grocery store with an olive bar) and mix with a squeeze of lemon juice, olive oil, red wine vinegar, capers, and cracked black pepper.

red onion jam: thinly slice red onions and cook SLOWLY in butter and salt.  once they start to break down (10-15 minutes) add a splash of red wine vinegar, a touch of sweetener like agave or honey, and balsamic vinegar.  reduce mixture until the consistency is similar to a thick marmalade.

homemade tzatziki: plain non-fat greek yogurt (or sour cream), cucumbers, dill, lemon juice, garlic, and salt.  **foodie note: if you shred the cucumbers, make sure to drain the water out of them by adding a little salt and letting them sit for five minutes.  nobody likes a runny tzatziki**

as you can see from the chain of events, the ciabatta was toasted, spread with olive tapenade, topped with fresh spinach, our lamb burger, and the red onion jam.  it was then finished off with some crumbled feta and tzatziki sauce.  the moral of the story is that with a little time and a little patience, a beautiful restaurant-style meal can be created in your own kitchen with some pretty basic ingredients.  however with absolutely no time and an overflowing amount of patients (when you work in a dentist's office like i do), you might want to keep a frozen pizza in your freezer and a bottle opener on hand.

#nerdsunite

**foodie note: ....MADE YA LOOK! insert shameless plug here for twitter: 

https://twitter.com/#!/fannyslater**