Fun with #OkCupid: 3 emails ... 3 different responses

First up, if you haven't read my OKC profile - you can check it out over yonder. Might make some sense to the things guys reply to, haha. But for reals, these are all actual emails I've received in the last 48 hours, and my actual responses back to them. It is through this transparent experience that I hope you all can take away some knowledge on what works and what doesn't in the hopes of making your online dating experiences that much more fanschmastically awesome. YAYYYY ONLINE DATING YAYYY!!! K ... cool ... here we go ...

Actual Response: THE. INITIAL. MESSAGE. IS. THE. MOST. IMPORTANT. PART. When it comes to online dating, and particularly on OKC where it is a free dating site and women are INUNDATED with messages - you want to keep it as simple and light as possible. Pick ONNNEEE specific detail from her profile, and ask her to elaborate. That's all a guy EVVEERRRR has to say. Using my profile as an example, an email I would respond to would be something along the lines of ... Have any good bar recommendations in NYC? I'm going to go there (as it says I was recently there) soon (keep it truthful, only ask if you are going to actually be there). It's open ended, and will make me freak out and go OMMMGGG yes yes yes!! I had the best XXX at XXX and it will change. your. life. 

That'll work. But yeah ... very very very important - keep it simple and specific. Easy peasy. Hope this helps!

Woooahhh ... this was a gnarly email. Why did the dude put himself immediately in the friend zone? I'm not on OKC for friends, I'm here to find someone to date! Why ask if I want to be friends?? 

Dudes, go in for the kill when it comes to online dating. WE. ARE. HERE. TO. BE. PICKED. UP!

So friggen pick us up!!! This guy was way too timid, and that lack of confidence is a turn off - I didn't even click his profile.

Actual Response: None

Sure ... lemme take a look ... 

Alrite - got a great default pic, clear shot of his face with no hat on or glasses of any kind!! Good job! 

lemme read the profile ... 

HAHAHHAHA omg this guy is HILARIOUS!!!!!! His personality BLEEEEEDDDSSS from the monitor, jumps out at you and makes you cry uncle. 

Good job man ... dare I even say - perfect job!! 

Actual Response: Two thumbs WAYYYYY up! If you lived closer, were a year older, and had a third nipple I might even marry you! Work on that!! =) 

Hope this helped you guys understand at least what is out there. Happy dating!!

#love

Time To Effing #GetItOn: A Bar Bitch Slap?! Shut the front door!!!

HAHAHA oh my oh my oh my. So I'm introducing a "control" into my current dating social experiment.  (I am conducting a new social experiment after my epic 103 dates by using OKC. I am still trying to find the organic root of attraction, but now taking the experiment offline while documenting it still online. You can read more about it here ... and read the rules here.)  I can explain more about it next week, but we've got a LOT going on that I'm super super super stoked about. Either way, totes met this awesome chickie Alison last night as she is besties with the chick that's going to be helping me out with the experiment. Yeah ... we're about to get a lot of people involved ... and shit's about to get AWESOMERRRRRRRRR!!! Either way, after we all met up last night, the girls went out with this duderino, and had a pretty gnarly thing happen. Take it away Alison!!!!  

*waves* Hi! Iʼm new to L.A...is this normal?

After a very enlightening meeting with the fabulous Ms. Jen Friel, my girl Shina and I  headed out to meet up with a friend of hers, who we had already hung out with earlier in  the day. He was a lot of fun, a “music video director” (I put that in quotes because Iʼm  never sure if someone really makes a living doing what they say they do here. He seemed pretty legit, though!). We will simply call him “JC”. JC told us to come over and meet him and his buddy (also a “director”) at the Velvet Margarita, an establishment draped in red velvet and playing Monkeeʼs songs in Spanish. So by default it was awesome. The food was amazing too! Even though I kept saying I wasnʼt hungry, more food kept being delivered to the table. And JC would always insist that I try everything out.

So after gorging myself on turkey empandas (sounds weird, but they were delish!) and finishing a tequila cosmo, I started feeling pretty drowsy. I got a little yawny, and JC said he was going to slap me if I didnʼt wake up. Well, for some reason, this sounded like a good idea to me. 

“Slap me. Iʼm being serious.” I was sitting across from a guy, asking him to slap me in the face in the middle of a restaurant. And he was into it. I also want to point out that JCʼs buddy ended up having a random guy meet him there, and they sat at one of the table having what looked like an interview while I prepared to get hit. We moved water glasses and candles out of the way. I think part of me really wanted to see what this guy would do. We had literally met that  day...did he really feel comfortable enough to slap me? 

We sat across from each other and locked eyes. He looked very serious. I had already decided that if he didnʼt hit me hard enough, that he was a pussy. But did he have it in him to really give it to me? I was prepared to find out. Before I knew it, BAM! He hit me hard enough to knock my head to the right and I definitely gasped. Sitting here the next morning, I can still sort of feel the sting. I told him I respected the fact that he didnʼt pussyfoot around, but not so much that I would have a bruise. We were all laughing pretty hard at this point.

He said he really wanted to hit me harder, but thought better of it. I told him that if heʼd hit me much harder, I probably would have cried, and we would have had a much different situation on our hands. 

I really hope the guy that was there to interview with his buddy got in the car and called his friends: “Dude! These directors I just interviewed with are hardcore! One guy slapped this girl right in front of me at the table! And she laughed about it!”

#iheartla

Special thanks to Effing Gear for sponsoring this social experiment. Dudes, have you seen their location based tees? Um yeah - totes the most ah-mazing thing evveerrrrrrrr!! Check 'em out over yonder!