#GeekSpeak: The sometimes random misadventures of @Abby_Cake

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Abby. I met her in Chicago at the #20SBSummit, and this chick is raaaddddd!! She considers herself more of a nerd than a geek - but I think she's just all shades of random and awesome. Oh and FTR, the TNTML stance on nerds versus geeks are that nerds are products of a genetic predisposition, and geeks are raised. BOOH-YAH!!! I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT ABBY!!! </editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @Abby_Cake

While I realize the opportunity of my traveling in a time machine is about as probable as my meeting Doctor Who himself, sometimes I enjoy playing pretend. In fact, Jared and I have a game where we ask one another varying what-if questions based solely around time travel.

“What if you could go back in time, and you wouldn’t alter the future, but you had to stay and live out your life on an alternate plane?”

“What if you could go back and undo one moment in time?”

“What if you had the choice to either time travel or stay in the present time, but gain the power of flight?”

If you ever have the chance to take a car ride with us, I promise you won’t be disappointed.

And so, in time with our moderate obsession with time travel and period based costumes and historical movies and a sundry of other nerdy items that you have probably already figured out about me, we always endeavor to spend one weekend a year at the Texas Renaissance Festival.

The Texas RenFest has expanded greatly since its inception and presently garners up to 60,000 people in a weekend. It has become huge. And is, as always, easy to get lost in. But I go every year and the act has become not only a tradition, but a place where I feel comfortable (at home even?). I notice all the new shops and restaurants, I speak to the employees (in an accent if I can get away with it), and I drink mead, lots of it — because that’s how Beowulf did it.

I realize that the extent to which I celebrate this festival borderlines on larping, but I am surprisingly okay with that. And I let people take pictures of/with me and I take pictures of people with spectacular costumes. And I dance to the Renaissance music and generally make a scene. It’s very free-spirited; I like being around like-minded people.

However, it’s generally disappointing that what was once such an interesting festival has begun to go the way of typical American spectatorship. When I first began attending, I felt out of place for not wearing a costume. Today I was definitely in the costume-wearing minority. I feel like commercialization is edging out the RenFest that I love and I hope in the years to come it will regain a sense of its’ former glory. But, unfortunately, I know cash is king.

I will always dance!

xx, @abby_cake

#nerdsunite

Want more from Abby?? Check out her blog over yonder - and don't forget to drop her a follow on twitter!!

#GeekSpeak: The sometimes random misadventures of @Abby_Cake

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Abby. I met her in Chicago at the #20SBSummit, and this chick is raaaddddd!! She considers herself more of a nerd than a geek - but I think she's just all shades of random and awesome. Oh and FTR, the TNTML stance on nerds versus geeks are that nerds are products of a genetic predisposition, and geeks are raised. BOOH-YAH!!! I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT ABBY!!!</editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @Abby_Cake

Sometimes I party with NBA stars -- no big deal.

By ‘party’ I actually mean eat too much of my Mom’s paella on a fold out table in the living room. And by NBA star I mean Chris Andersen (aka Bird Man, aka that-one-player-with-a-lot-of-tattoos).   

Okay, so lemme give you the full story. My Dad is a basketball coach by trade. First, imagine his disappointment that I played YMCA basketball for four seasons and scored two points... total. Answer: it was passing. Next, imagine how many lives he has changed in 28 years. Answer: a lot.

About 12 years ago, he happened to coach a player who went on to play in the NBA. Which means sometimes (like when there are pesky NBA lockouts) he hangs out with my Dad.

Over the years, I have read a lot of cruel things about Chris on the internet. My initial response is to bristle and defend the guy who used to hang me on the regulation basketball rim post-win. But I have learned that trolling is not attractive, and in turn typically attempt to avoid reading negative things online in general.

Allow me to tell you some things that are true about Chris Andersen:

He has a blue pit bull that is undeniably adorable, and even my Mom enjoyed it’s company. 

He can quote movies like no one’s business -- anything from Tommy Boy to Tombstone. I know several people who find inserting movie quotations into conversation to be a borderline competitive hobby. Word of advice, he will beat you. He will also beat you at a dunk contest.

He can palm a milk jug, jar of sun tea, oh... and a basketball. So if you have tiny hands, like yours truly, and struggle to pour tea, it can come in handy.

The tattoos are aesthetic. He is genuinely a very nice person. And respectful -- because he’s a country boy, specifically a Texas boy. :)

Also, my Mom makes some pretty badass paella -- so if any other people (famous or otherwise) would like the recipe, I will share.

xx, @abby_cake

#nerdsunite

Want more from Abby?? Check out her blog over yonder - and don't forget to drop her a follow on twitter!!

#GeekSpeak: The sometimes random misadventures of @Abby_Cake

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Abby. I met her in Chicago at the #20SBSummit, and this chick is raaaddddd!! She considers herself more of a nerd than a geek - but I think she's just all shades of random and awesome. Oh and FTR, the TNTML stance on nerds versus geeks are that nerds are products of a genetic predisposition, and geeks are raised. BOOH-YAH!!! I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT ABBY!!! </editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @Abby_Cake

Does anyone else watch Mad Men?

I don't know WHY it took me so long to discover this damn show, but it is amazing. I've spent several afternoons binging on Don Draper and candy corn lately. I finally finished all of the seasons offered on Netflix, and then I reached that point where I was done and was all, "my life is over!!"

Instead of sinking into a never-ending pit of despair (inevitably followed by more candy corn -- why do I love that shit so much??), I began brainstorming how I could continue my Mad Men obsession without seeming crazy.

Initial ideas included: make Jared dress up like Don Draper, invite my friends over and act out scenes from the show -- either through script handouts or trickery, find a Joan Holloway wig to wear all day, take up smoking.
However, fortune smiled on me when we discovered two bottles of 1960's alcohol tucked away at Jared's mom's house. Seriously. FROM THE 60'S. That may not seem like a long time ago, but how did this shit not get drank?

I spent a few minutes Googling "Mad Men drink recipes" -- and found out AMC has a site devoted to just that.

(I'm not alooone!)

But then I discovered Bacardi had a bunch of recipes listed on the back. Apparently, rum wasn't super popular back in the 60's, and so we postulated that the recipe list was meant to encourage people to drink it.

Or maybe I am just thinking like an ad man.

Anyway, we found a recipe for a Bacardi Collins:

• 1 jigger rum (I made it a generous one)
• 2 teaspoons frozen lemonade concentrate
• Mix in shaker with ice. Pour in cup.
• Top with club soda & two ice cubes.
• Garnish with cherry and lemon slice.

The gin we just mixed with ice and lime concentrate. I was incredibly intoxicated because YES that bottle says 90 proof and it's basically been fermenting for 50 years. No Big!

IT WAS DELICIOUS! I thought the rum was extra sweet and, I am not a gin fan, but that particular vintage was smooth. I handed my concoction off to Jared's sister and she told me I had to be an alcoholic because she couldn't drink that (I'm not, calm down!)

If you get a chance to try some 1960's liquor DO IT (and I still might be Betty Draper for Halloween.)

xx, @abby_cake

#nerdsunite

Want more from Abby?? Check out her blog over yonder - and don't forget to drop her a follow on twitter!!

#GeekSpeak: The sometimes random misadventures of @Abby_Cake

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Abby. I met her in Chicago at the #20SBSummit, and this chick is raaaddddd!! She considers herself more of a nerd than a geek - but I think she's just all shades of random and awesome. Oh and FTR, the TNTML stance on nerds versus geeks are that nerds are products of a genetic predisposition, and geeks are raised. BOOH-YAH!!! I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT ABBY!!!</editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @Abby_Cake

Five Places I Have Woken Up. 

<b>In front of my computer.</b>
In college I moved my sofa (yes, a sofa) in front of my computer desk so I could sleep at odd intervals between camping monsters on FFXI. I often fell asleep only to be woken up by the trumpeting of a party member alerting me that we had claimed Valkurm Emperor. Grade: C That sofa (in reality, a loveseat) was not too comfortable, and I don't like being woken up, but the convenience was nice.

<b>My desk at work.</b>
One of my students bought me a Drank from the corner store, which is described as some kind of "chill out" de-energy drink. Just what high school students need. To appease them, I had half of it, then promptly passed out on my desk for the entirety of my 40 minute off-period. Grade: C I woke up groggy as hell, but getting a nap in at work is kind of fun. 

<b>The back of a truck.</b>
What Texas girl hasn't been here? After spending the day getting extremely intoxicated, crashing a fraternity party (where I was mistaken for a sophomore) and playing a lot of slap the bag while watching country bands at a Chili festival, I stoically walked (although there were offers to carry me) to my friend's truckbed, where I spent the night. Upon climbing in, I covered myself with a mattress pad and cried out to no one, "this isn't a sleeping bag!" before succumbing to sleep. Grade: B I was so drunk I didn't notice the dew accumulating on my mattress pad and actually woke up feeling fairly well. I braided my second-day hair and used the port-o-potty like a champ.

<b>On the floor, with my pants off, cuddling my dog.</b>
A friends birthday party got a little out of hand and, I don't really have all the details, but someone took me home after I gave them the wrong gate code (or was just shouting random numbers). I also threw up in a friends purse (IN the purse, people). I only managed to get my pants off before giving up somewhere between the hallway and living room. Grade: D Not an F, only because Sherman was my pillow. He is fuzzy and non-judgmental.

<b>The Grand Canyon</b>
After a 48 hour round trip and three days in Vegas with six of my  friends, we opted to camp out at the Grand Canyon. Little did we know,  there is still snow on the ground in March. Stoically, we accepted  nature's challenge and set about starting a fire and getting roaring  drunk (as if our livers hadn't been punished enough over the last week).  I woke up on the freezing ground listening to animal howls fill the  air, but with Jared's arm wrapped securely around me - that's how I  figured out he loved me. Then I watched the sun rise over the Grand Canyon. Grade: A+ Do I really need to explain??

xx, @abby_cake

#nerdsunite

Want more from Abby?? Check out her blog over yonder - and don't forget to drop her a follow on twitter!!

#GeekSpeak: The sometimes random misadventures of @Abby_Cake

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Abby. I met her in Chicago at the #20SBSummit, and this chick is raaaddddd!! She considers herself more of a nerd than a geek - but I think she's just all shades of random and awesome. Oh and FTR, the TNTML stance on nerds versus geeks are that nerds are products of a genetic predisposition, and geeks are raised. BOOH-YAH!!! I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT ABBY!!! </editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @Abby_Cake

I have been on the pill since I was 17. Originally to regulate my period, presently because I like sex. However, if you recall my last birth control related post, I decided to get an implant in my arm that would effectively eliminate the risk of pregnancy and render my period into obscurity. Sign me up, amirite? But, I was on the pill until the end of August: specifically Previfem.

Why does this matter? Well, my Mom called me yesterday to tell me she received an interesting letter in the mail.

<b>Mom: </b>"So, uh, it looks like your birth control has been recalled."

<b>Me: </b>"But... it's in my arm?"

<b>Mom: </b>"No your pill, last month they messed up the packaging so you might have taken it in reverse. Do you still have the package because it might not even be yours."

<b>Me: </b>"Hell no, I threw it away weeks ago!"

<b>Mom: </b>"Oh, well, I figured I'd better tell you because if you're pregnant I didn't want you to think it was your new birth control. And it's probably not good for you to be drinking so much if you <i>are</i> pregnant. I mean, I am sure you aren't pregnant... but you know alcohol isn't good for babies. So maybe no margaritas tonight?"

<b>Me: </b>"I have to go...."

As I mentioned, my new birth control basically made my period obsolete so I <i>haven't had one</i> in a month. Naturally, I made the logical first step which was totally freaking out, followed by looking up the recall on Huffington Post, followed by Tweeting about it, followed by a trip to the drug store.

If you've never had to buy a pregnancy test before, you should do it just for funsies. It's way more awkward than buying condoms. I had this look of petrified terror on my face that I was certain everyone could sense; and the cashier always sort of analyzes your emotions like Data from Star Trek. It's awful.

Pregnancy test procured, I went back to my apartment where I told my boyfriend, "Wish me luck. At least we know their college would be paid for with the lawsuit I would level against them." Uncomfortable laughter followed.

It should be mentioned that peeing on a stick is not as easy as it sounds (does it sound easy?). I ended up backwards on the toilet with my pants all the way off. Then, there's the epic 2-3 minutes of impatiently sitting (with or without your pants still off) while the stick considers your fate.

Ultimately, it was negative.

*cue marching band of relief*

Suffice to say, I was completely freaked out and am really glad I am not taking a pill anymore. I mean, DO YOUR JOB PHARMACEUTICAL COMPANIES!! There was NO NEED to ruin my perfectly good Saturday night of watching Star Trek in my pajamas.

xx, @abby_cake

#nerdsunite

Want more from Abby?? Check out her blog over yonder - and don't forget to drop her a follow on twitter!!