Fun with #OkCupid: 3 different emails ... 3 different responses

First up, if you haven't read my OKC profile - you can check it out over yonder. Might make some sense to the things guys reply to, haha. But for reals, these are all actual emails I've received recently, and my actual responses back to them. It is through this transparent experience that I hope you all can take away some knowledge on what works and what doesn't in the hopes of making your online dating experiences that much more fanschmastically awesome. YAYYYY ONLINE DATING YAYYY!!! K ... cool ... here we go ...

I get asked all of the time about my motivation for going out on over 103 dates in 9 months. The first thing you have to understand is that it was ALL accidental - and documented in real time. I went out on 96 dates in 8 months, and while I was dogsitting for a friend watching the Bachelor decided to write a reflection piece on my dating experiences thus far. It was from that, I stared at the numbers realizing I had something here ... something big. I then decided to package it stopping at 103 for branding and marketing purposes. If I had sought out to go out on that many dates from day one I would have either a) burned out or b) lost interest. I was couch surfing at the time, so I was already committed to running this site morning, noon, and night at that point - and this was how I had a social life. I never let guys buy me dinner (too time consuming) but I indicated in my profile that if they bought me a beer, I'd give them a hug. I was TOTALLY transparent through the entire thing even noting that anything the guys said to me may end up on the site.

My role for 2012 is ABSOLUTELY going to transition, as I have learned through working with a dating coach and a shaman that I have personal blocks that I've had to get through ... but I'm putting in the work and getting shit done ... that's all I can really do.

I know now what I like, and what I don't like. I don't get boy crazy very often, I'm just doing my thing and if a guy can keep up - great! If not, coolio Julio, it's all a numbers game. 

This isn't a joke, it's my life - and I am very committed to living the SHIT out of it every.single.day.

Actual Response: rad! thanks so much! i actually had a really great date with a guy who i am only 75% with last week - so its making me rethink a lot of things. i did the 103 because i was couch surfing. i got a lot of attention for that and for my life in general, so i had to reel it back a bit. i now am shifting the business to act as an adviser and help dudes out with online dating understanding what works and what doesn't. im just along on the journey! and afterall, isnt that the destination!! =)

be well!!! xoxoxo

Emails like this will never, ever work. I can't begin to tell you how many, "hi, hello, or hiya" emails I get on a daily basis. Take two seconds to actually read my profile, pick out ONE detail, ask me to elaborate - and BOOM! I'll respond. This is pooey, and no one likes poo.

Actual response: None

Note to nerds, when emailing a chica on OKC, make sure you SPELL HER FREAKING NAME RIGHT!!!

It's Jen, one N, no A.

Actual response: None

There ya go nerderinos. Best of luck out there!!!

#love

Fun with #OkCupid: I GET THIS EMAIL ALL THE TIME!!

AHHH!!! This is totes freaking me out! I thought it was cute at first, but now I realize this has be in a book somewhere on how to court a woman online or something. Looky looky the email I just got on OkC:

Like SERIOUSLY!!! I just got almost the EXACT same email two days ago from another dude, and last week - SAME THING!!!

The first few times, they all got a response from me - but now I am just wondering if some dude somewhere told dudes to do this. SERIOUSLY!!!

I'm floored!!!!!!! ... a nice marble variety ... but for reals! What is going ON?!?!?!

Oh and here's an email that never and will never get a date:

#Facepalm

PS. And FTR, I am no longer dating on OKC, but I keep it up incase someone or something catches my eye. Hey, you never know.

Click here to view my profile on OkCupid

Fun with #OkCupid: Dude, date 100 ... did that really just happen?

Omg omg omg omg omgggg I just had the worst OKC date. Like the worst.

Alrite, I won't say the worst out of all the 100 I have been on - because, good lord there have been a lot of bad ones, but this one was just the most socially awkward out of them all.

Met up with this dude tonight at The Dime - didn't even Foursquare checkin, cause he got there before I did - didn't want to be rude, and be on my phone ... and dude, this kid was just weird. Like weird weird.

We were an 87% match, 87% friend, and 7% enemy on OKC - but his pictures were kickin and this dude was cute. That honestly should have been my biggest sign that this prolly wasn't a good idea. I don't date cute. Cute does nothing for me. In my current OKC experiment, the dudes that I have hit it off with are quirky at best. They are uniquely unique in their own bit of awesomeness. There is no type, there is no theme other than the fact they each owned their shit and rocked whatever it was that they had to rock.

This kid looked like he walked out of an Abercrombie ad. UUGHHHHH no bueno. Commercially attractive people are alarmingly uninteresting, as they've never had anything other than their looks to get them by in life. He was way more attractive IRL than in his pictures.

He's studying law at UCLA, but he's one of those super super super book smart people, but socially just not there. I'm not book smart - at all. Dude, I didn't even bring a calculator to my SATs - academics never did anything for me. All I did was learn how to hustle the system to get the grade that I needed to not only graduate early, but with honors. I didn't actually absorb anything. Everything that I learned, I learned through my travels and through just talking to people. This kid was just uncomfortable in his own skin.

Dude, even down to the beer he ordered. Again, I got there 5 mins after him, so he ordered me a PBR, and he goes - this is only my second time having a PBR, I dunno how I feel about it. It's like, then why order it???

OMMGGGGGGGGGGGGGG and we talked tech, and he was just out to lunch ... and THEN! Oh yes, and THEN!!!! He goes, what does your necklace say? I go, oh! It's #nerdsunite, our official hashtag on twitter. I was like its super cute, I love it.

He goes, well I dunno about cute. It's a bit too blingy for my taste. Really, did that just come out of your mouth? OMG OMG OMG OMG!! This site is my life - twitter is my thing. I would KILL someone for less. Did you straight up just knock my brand??? Thank GOOODDD he said he had an early class at that point, because I was literally about to excuse myself and not return. HAHA! I cannot believe I was just about to walk out on a date. That is not my style. Tolerance and patience are everything to me - I think you can learn so much just by sitting with people and asking them things. UGHHHHHHH!!!!

WTF OKCUPID!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?! How was that an EIGHTY SEVEN PERCENT MATCH!?!?!?!!?!?!?!

Lesson learned: New qualifying question for each date is, what kind of phone do you have?

#UGH!!!!!

Live in LA and wanna date me? Hit me up on OKC over yonder!

Pretty please ... like with a cherry on top ... cause like, I'll make it worth your while. I swear, just ask your brother.

OMG OMG OMG PS. ANNNDDDD he asked me, why I would even bother to have an ipod and a smartphone?!?! I was like what?! Seriously?!?! I was like I have different ipods for different things. I was like my smartphone is more for streaming music, I don't download music onto it - my ipods are my life. I always listen to music, just depends on the music that is stored on each one.

Must. Clear. Cache.

Finally!!!! An honest response to one of my #OkCupid dates!

Alrite, so last night I went out on another OKC date. Posted about it over yonder - and actually, I was pleasantly surprised this morning when I saw an ENTTIIIRRRREEEEE post in the comment section. Like seriously - entire post!

I've wanted an honest reaction out of the guys I've gone out with more for my own sick and twisted perverse pleasure to find truth and document ... but the problem is, is dudes will either read what I have to say, get offended and just go off - (*bangs hands on chest* male ego hurt. male react with ARRGHHHH!!!) ORRRR they will continually look for a way to get in my pants, not want to "spoil" anything, and not be honest at all.

If I'm a bitch, tell me I'm a bitch. I wear big girl pants, I can handle it. I'm again just more curious in finding ways to document life experiences in the most honest way possible.

ALLLLLL that being said, here's the post from Hank Scorpio!

FUCKING AMAZING!!!!

Thank you, Hank! Seriously - THAT'S what I've been looking for.

In all seriousness though, I literally had one of the most insane days ever yesterday. Processing all this paperwork, on the phone with lawyers, conference calls to new biz peeps - it's been fucking BAT SHIT! But, I realized I had a few hours off for the evening, and thought why not!

Major suckage on being late. Dude, I am totally never ever mclever that person. Being on foot sucks when you forget something back at the house. It was that dreaded NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

I really liked Hank as a person. I was incredibly incredibly incredibly flattered at his persistence and his raw genuine nature certainly came across in the emails - but when it comes to someone I am attracted to, they have to OWN IT. I don't possess the vocabulary to properly articulate it - it's a feeling, and its an instant switch to me being turned on. For reals.

Seriously though, Hank - thanks so much dude. I could not have felt like more of an ass for being late, and THEN having to go to that concert - but seriously, you're an incredible human being. Like straight up - it's crazy. I just wanna shake you, and say let it out baby!!!! Go have some FUN!!!!!! Sounds like with some of you're stories you're almost there - just let it out!!! Life's too fabulous to not be enjoyed in every sense and orphus we have. Wait, did I say orphus? hahaha - dude that just presented a mental picture I did not want. HAHAHA!!!

#rawr