#NerdsUnite: What Dating Stage Are You At?

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Barry. He's my dating/ life coach, and he's a pretty rad mofo! Definitely has helped me break through a lot of things on an emotional and psychological level .... me gusta mucho. He's here to now share those nerdy nuggets of wisdom with you all. I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT BARRY!! </editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @DatingCoachB

I love dating-coaching and helping clients. One of the reasons I do this fairly well is that I've lived all three stages of the dating cycle.

All through high school and the first few years of college I was frustrated and lonely, which added up to horny, leading me to my second stage.

For most of my twenties I was obsessed with meeting, dating and bedding women. I still did it with respect and a minimum of manipulation, mind you (is it manipulative to whisper a sexy Spanish love poem in a woman's ear?) but the fact is I was a player. Casual sex was the thing. Until I ended up trying to date 8 women with only 7 nights in the week and I realized I'd gone WAY TOO FAR. Which brings us to stage three.

After I turned thirty I settled down. It became less about chasing casual sex, and more about a real, quality relationship with like, you know, emotions and stuff. You could say I was finally maturing!

So when I work with a male client, I really empathize with whichever stage they are at, from frustrated through sowing his wild oats, to settling down with a girl he deserves.

It seems like a big problem in the dating world for women and men is trying to date someone who is at a different stage than you are.

My female clients also hit a stage where quality of relationship becomes more important than attraction and chemistry. They give up the fascinating bad boys, and the radical Che Guevara t-shirt wearers and look for a grown-man with whom they can create a meaningful, committed relationship. It still has to have passion, of course, but the chemsitry becomes less about teenage self expression (when you sleep with guys out of defiance, danger, or fascination) and more about emotional-based chemistry.

We all need to honor our three stages, and accept others for where they are at. It all starts with knowing which stage your at, and understanding why. Then deciding whether to date someone else at the same stage, or move on to the next stage if this one is no longer serving you.

So, what stage are you at, and why is it where you need to be?

The answers you discover could be very revealing.

Happy Dating!

#nerdsunite

Twitter: @DatingCoachB
Website: www.GetTheGirlYouDeserve.com
(Ladies' Website, www.GetTheGuyYouDeserve.com Coming Soon!)

#NerdsUnite: Breaking down the steps to ensure you get a kiss at midnight!

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Barry. He's a dating coach here in LA, and starting in January he is going to help me out with dating and totes offer up some advice for the community! How friggen RAD is that!!! Here is his latest and greatest. HIT IT BARRY!!! </editorsnote>

(Please note for dudes - swap out the him with her ... and this article is kosher for you too! kthxbye)

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @DatingCoachB

New Year's Eve is a great opportunity for a first kiss with the guy you wish would make a move. The truth is, connecting with the man of your dreams comes down to a few key moments. The moment he first notices you. The moment he approaches you. The moment he asks you on a date. And, of course, the moment you share your first kiss.

New Year's Eve creates the perfect opportunity for you to finally kiss that guy you want. He might be someone you've been on a couple of dates with, or someone you've known for awhile but never had a chance to get romantic with.

Here's how to make the most of your New Year's Eve this year.

Step One

Make sure you are at the same party as the guy you want to kiss, obviously.

Step Two

Make sure you break the touch barrier early in the night. Start with friendly touching on the arm or upper back. As the night progresses and the champagne flows, see how he reacts to escalated touching on the lower back, or letting your hand linger a little longer. Look into his eyes more. Find reasons to lean in and tell him things (either whispered secrets or speaking loudly over the music). Let your cheeks and bodies brush if possible, but only if it's natural. The more closeness and contact you can promote the better.

Step Three

Flirt a little during the night, if you feel he'll reciprocate. If he is not reciprocating, he may not be interested enough in you to kiss you. One way to get your flirting going on the topics of romance and intimacy is to ask him to look back on how this past year was in terms of romance and passion, and then both share what you want the New Year to bring you in terms of passion.

Step Four

Allow the tension to build. Don't disarm or defuse the sexual tension. As the evening goes on, you may feel a little electricity or attraction in the air. Let it hang there, especially as you get nearer to midnight. Don't undercut it with self-deprecating comments, or discussing 'downer' topics like sick relatives or divorce. Stick to fun, sexy vibes and looking forward to the New Year.

Step Five

Close to midnight, compliment him on some quality of his that you really love. Touch him affectionately. Keep eye contact.

Step Six

Keep him close as the countdown begins. Put your hand on his lower back, or on his chest. Smile at him and let your bodies lean against each other. When the countdown hits zero and the party poppers go off, turn to face him. Lean in for a kiss. When you get about a foot from his face you'll notice if he turns his head slightly to get a kiss on the cheek ("Let's just be friends." or "I haven't decided yet.) If he continues to face you then finish coming in for the kiss!

Step Seven

Kiss him! Match his style of kissing. Open-mouthed if he's passonate and into it. Closed lips to start if that's how he is. But you can escalate the kiss with caressing, and by slightly parting your own lips to see if he follows suit. (More detailed tips on kissing will be available in my upcoming booklet "Kisses That Seal The Deal").

If you aren't at the same party as the man you want, then text him playfully throughout the night. At midnight, send him a playful "kiss" text, humorously telling him that if he were there he would have gotten the best kiss he'll get all year. If he is disappointed, you know he wants that kiss the next time you see him!

Have a Happy New Year and HAVE FUN FLIRTING!

Your Dating-Coach,

Barry

#nerdsunite

Want more from Barry? Call or email him for your free one-on-one Dating Quiz and Assessment today. BarryPaulPrice@gmail.com & 323.301.6038

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