Perfect opening email on #okcupid

Looky, looky the email I just got. Yes, I know I post a lot of the weird ones that i get ... but I also like to highlight what works. Like this one ... 

Cute, engaging, witty. I totally checked out his profile, and am totally planning on responding. 

Don't ever say what you are ... SHOW ME!! Saying you're fun when you look like you have a rod so far up your ass in each picture, isn't going to get me to respond. Nor is, I'm funny and witty - while your profile screams boring, and stale. 

THUMBS UP!!!!! This worked!!!

#OKCupid is for dating, right?

I SWEAR this just cracks me up!!! The tables have been TOTALLY turned, and now at LEAST 90% of my inbox is filled with work-related stuff. I totally dig it, as all this nerdy talk makes my nerdy little love cave hotter than Death Valley in July. 

Looky ... looky! 

Re: That 70s show? Nope! Will have to check it out on Hulu. And mayybeee ... none that have admitted it outright at least. I'm not quite sure what benefit someone would have from it, as I don't feature names or faces. But, if they're that excited about being on TNTML, they can also just send me a post for a review: JenFriel@TalkNerdyToMeLover.com - I read them all personally, and am always stoked to have more nerdy peeps on board. 

GREAT FRIGGEN QUESTION!!

#OkCupid: I don't have words ...

Looky, looky at this email I just got on OKCupid. I'm not very often speechless in life. I have been an accredited member of the peanut gallery since 1984, but um ... this is a perfect example of an email that you should never, EVER send to a nerd. 

Like really ... really ... really?!?! You don't have web experience, just want to like find an easy way to make money while you perfect your CRAFT?!?!?! Dude, go take your idea and consult for some random "work from home" web company. I'm sure its awesome ... just like your monologue from Hamlet.

What, too harsh? Who cares ... 

OKCupid: #nerdy and flirty

Apparently no topic is off limits on OKCupid ... looky, looky, the email I just got.

OHHH LORDYYYY!! Chris Hansen ... take a seat ... whatever happened to To Catch a Predator btw?? Too many lawsuits?!? BAHHHH!!!!

#Okcupid Public Service Announcement

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @maniacalmorgan

Check out this article I just found.

According to recent studies, it is inadvisable to procreate with fellow Okcupid-ers. Due to the lack of background information stored on each user, one doesn't know about the genetic integrity of the person they plan to procreate with. After a few drinks, that 6 suddenly turns into an 9. One thing leads to another and 9 months later you're stuck with a genetically inferior baby. Raising this baby and unleashing him into mainstream society will alter future generations until the human race dwindles into nothingness. 

If one does decide to partake in sexual intercourse with someone met on Okcupid, there are some very important things you need to remember.

1) Use protection. At the very least, you should carry a 9mm with you at all times. Okcupid doesn't discriminate against who can sign up. 

2) Wear a condom. Even if you aren't engaged in sexual activities, you should still be wearing one. Put it on before the date even starts. Better to be safe than sorry.

3) Arrive early and stake out in a concealed area. Secret internet fatties are everywhere and we don't want an entire generation of fat babies. Worse comes to worse, you can always outrun a SIF.

4) Remember the children. The human race needs to survive and it is up to you Okcupid-ers to be responsible enough to not procreate.

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