<editorsnote>Hi, I'm Jen Friel, and we here at TNTML examine the lives of nerds outside of the basements and into the social media, and dating world. We have over 75 peeps that write about their life in real time. (Real nerds, real time, real deal.) Sit back, relax, and enjoy some of the stories!!</editorsnote>
Dude, AH-MAZING!!! Congrats congrats congrats on all the travel - I'll TOTALLY grab a beer!!
I'm COMPLETELY serious on this nerds - if I am EEVVVEERRRRR in your area, please please please reach out and let's grab coffee or a beer. I'm serious. This website is my soul and artistic contribution to this world. If your eye balls hit it I would love to personally thank you.
For reals. You guys NEVER bother me - you inspire me!!!!
I'm in Boston until Monday, then Monday afternoon I'm heading over to NYC where I will be until the wee early morning on the 16th, and then I'm in DC from the 16-18th when I fly back to LA.
Hello again nerderinos. If you've been reading this site for at least the last week or so, you're pretty aware that I am having problems of EPIC PROPORTIONS regarding the dating scene here in Boston.
Seriously ... it's not only BAD here ... it's REALLY FUCKING BAD. And all the locals, and people that I've tweeted with about it - say the same thing, "it's just how dudes are."
Guys out here will NOT approach girls at a bar. I've literally stopped short of holding up a sign that says "Free to a good fuck," and gotten nada. (FTR, I'm not even necessarily looking to get some - just genuinely go out on a date with a dude that doesn't know who I am online. IRL boy meets IRL girl. IRL boy thinks IRL girl is cute. IRL boy asks IRL girl out on a date. That's all I'm askin' here!)
It's bad. Really fucking bad. But I'm at least taking my findings and am able to articulate better to males and females about dating in this area. Research wasn't intended, but every experience in life to me is one I can learn from.
ALLLLLL that being said, this morning I had something rather unexpected happen.
I was walking to the T station on this little side street by where I'm staying, and RIIIGGHHHHTTTTTT as I was getting to the curb about to cross the street, this car pulls up from behind me - turning right, which literally put his car right in front of me - and the duderino shouts out, hey! Would you like a ride?
WOOOAHHHHHHH!!! My first thought was, where the FUCK did you come from??
Seriously. Men, don't ever ... and I mean EVER approach a woman on the street like that unless you're about to kidnap her and take her into your creepy white van.
My inner ninja IMMEDIATELY popped out going into attack mode - and was literally about to throw down.
When a dude approaches me like that I go from my happy-go-lucky hippie Jen Jen mode to ATTACK - AND YOU DON'T WANT THAT!!!
On a cellular level my adrenaline kicked in and I yelled to him "NO!" But .25 seconds later, my hormones kicked in, and I thought - holy fuck, this dude is HOT!
He looked clean and presentable. Obviously driving to work or somewhere, and on this mostly cloudy sprinkling day in Boston, I'm sure was just trying to be a nice guy.
He waved and drove off.
NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! I thought as he pulled away.
Why on EARTH didn't you just pull over and say, hey! I think you're pretty cute. Can I take you out sometime?
Had that been his approach, I absolutely 100% would have said yes. Albeit, I would have met him somewhere ... well lit ... but I totally would have at least grabbed a beer with the duderino and not gone all ninja and be prepared to throw the fuck down.
I am deeply saddened that the ONE time a dude approached me in Boston, my first response was to attack him ... and not even in a fun sexual way, like in a - you're about to take a visit to the ER.
Really love life? Could you GET any worse????
T-minus 6 days til NY. Get me OUT of Boston!!!!!!!!
<editorsnote> Jordan is a dating coach. But not like "a" dating coach ... lemme rephrase that, he is THE dating coach. He has a show on SiriusXM called "Game On" and he's a super smarty pants when it comes to examining social dynamics. No ... like for real. </editorsnote>
#TalkNerdyToMeLover's Jordan Harbinger
Women understand abundance very clearly. By the time they develop breasts they begin to see men in a different way. They soon find out men want sex from them and will do just about anything to get it. They have their choice of whom they will sleep with and they have to start looking for reasons why they CAN’T sleep with every halfway-decent-looking guy who buys them a drink or asks them out on a date or else they would never get out of bed. Women themselves are highly sexual people—as much if not more than we are—which makes this hard and is the reason why they have to be choosy.
This is personified in an episode of Sex and the City in which one of the women goes out to dinner with a potential mate and he accidentally gets salad dressing on the side of his face. At this point, it’s all she can think about—and suddenly attraction is gone. It is her job to find reasons—no matter how arbitrary they are—why not to invite you into her life. It is her job to find reasons to not sleep with you; so let’s stop giving them reasons.
Get cleaned up, put on some decent clothes, stop being a pussy, tell her how you feel about her, and escalate. It is your job as a man to escalate and hers as a woman to pace it. Lead the interaction, find confidence in yourself and use it. Women are looking for the following cues not to sleep with you:
Unsure of yourself
Bad body language
Unable to be comfortable
Awkward around other men and women
Unable to be in the moment
Lack of sense of humor
Bending to their every whim
Speaking to them logically while they are in an emotional state
Neediness and approval seeking behavior
They want sex and they want it now, but why get it from you when they have a stable of guys they already know. They are bored of the guys they already sleep with. If they were not, most likely they would be in a relationship with them. They are on the prowl for better mates. You are going to have to rise above and lead them to a better man.
Youare going to be him, so own it and believe it. Quit stepping all over yourself. Move one foot in front of the other and proceed like you have the tools for every job and know how to use them without a flinch or hesitation. This comes down to a basic idea of just not screwing it up!
If all you have to do is not screw it up then it should be pretty easy, right?
Randombling: A 5 minute long unedited random stream of consciousness produced by a nerd for nerds.
#nowplaying:Empire State of Mind - Jay-Z/ Alicia Keys
THANK YOU SO SO SO SO SO SO MUCH TALK NERDY TO ME, LOVER!!! XOXOXOOh my gatos nerderinos ... first off, thank you all SO SO SOOOOO much for the well wishes on the Comcast TV show launch today. I found out there will be 2 more airing next monday ... and 2 more after that ... and 2 more after that. So basically they're rolling out season 1 - and then BOOM just like that, you get season 2 (which I'm currently filming and editing).
I cannot BEGIN to describe the amount of gratitude I have towards everyone in this community, and everyone that reads us, and spreads the good word of the nerd. This site is only 22 months old, and today we took our first step. BIG - HUGE - DEAL!!!
Basically, between you, me, and uh, the internet - I am launching my own new media production company. This website is going to be a property in it, along with the OTHER TV shows I am working on (yeah, did I mention that the scripted pilot based on this loverly site is like going superly awesomely well. We had to scrap the first script, but the new writer is TOTALLY rad, and dudes, for real - when she first read the pitch to us all before I left LA - I totes teared up. She NAILED IT!!!!!! Again, it's scripted - it's like sex and the city, and I'm the new Carrie Bradshaw. So. Effin. RAD!!), and the books that will correspond as well (I want them to all be interactive in various capacities).
Lemme just stress this right now though - all of this sounds super fancy pants, and it honestly is ... but at the same time it's organic. I'm already doing all of this stuff, and it's already working - I am just bat shit crazy and can't not see the big picture in things ... plus, I have a background in sales, so it's sort of engrained in my personality to want to go for the bigger prize and not settle for less. At the end of the day however, I very literally cannot stress enough that I could get hit by a bus walking out of this apartment right now, and I'd totes be the happiest camper on this PLLAANNNEETTTTT!! I did something I believed in, went against the grain for a year, followed my heart, and built something I believed in. That in and of itself is good enough for me, and I am humbled that ANYONE even fucking reads this site. So, very sincerely ... from the depths of my FRIGGEN SOUL ... thank you. thank you. thank you.
I really mean this too, if your eye balls hit this site and I am in your area- I want to grab a beer. I'm just finishing up the first round of editing tonight, and about to go grab a beer with this duderino. You all are my heart, and I'll never not be available for you guys - so please, you're not bugging me ...
T-minus 7 days til I head to NY and am literally in 3 days worth of meetings with my management talking to like every network ever about giving me a reality/documentary show of some sort. They are called "generals" and basically you just sit down and tell the suits your story. I'm pretty stoked to talk mostly about the marketing integration that I want to do with social media. I'm FASCINATED by being able to tell stories in real time. Seriously, I have all these adventures - tweet 'em out, and then boom tell the full story on the site less than 24 hours later. No one knows what I am doing, and it stays INCREDIBLY organic and real. Social media is definitely the new reality TV and I want to find the formula to make it all ... work. That is my current mission, and yes, I have chosen to accept it.
All my love and all my heart - if I could make out with each and every one of you I would ... but then, like, that'd be a lot of spit, and I'm not mad at a little here and there, but when it borderlines requiring a water permit - we have a problem.
I'm also super horny btw. God damn you Boston with your horrible dating scene. OH! I'm seeing Cute Boy Chicago in LA the day after I get back. Oddly enough, we met in Chicago, but he's from LA - and currently living in DC ... I was going to meet him in DC since I'm going to be there at the end of next week - but he will be back in LA. UGH! I can't keep up with this. So long story short, I am going to be back at the same time he will still be in LA, so we're going to kick it. Dude, Best. Sex. Ever. Need more ... STAT!!!
AHH!! Big day - I can finally announce this project I've been working on since June, and currently the reason why I am in Boston for 3 weeks.
Are you ready????
I ... Jen Friel ... am your New England representative for the Comcast On-Demand Channel "VidBlogger Nation."
How EXCITED are you by this fact?!?!?!
I know I am!!
Wait, you're prolly sitting there wondering what VidBlogger Nation is aren't you. You crazy nerds with your everything-need-to-know-ness.
VidBlogger Nation is a new socially integrated hybrid channel on Comcast local on-demand featuring local tastemakers showing you around with everything you need to know about the area.
Basically, each season I have 12 adventures throughout the area (season 1 Connecticut - season 2 and 3 Boston). Yeah, how rad is that - season 1 airs starting today, and we already got renewed for seasons 2 and 3. SUH-WEET!!!!
I'm pretty stoked, and this project means a lot to me because I am producer, talent, and editor on it. Basically everything of everything you are seeing is all me. Literally.
Take a look if you get a chance - I'd superly duperly appreciate it ... and as exciting as season 1 was, season 2 is going FREAKING AH-MAZING-LY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So so so much more good stuff coming. Can't begin to tell you all how EXCITED I AM!!!BAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
On that note, I have to get back to filming season 2. It's under deadline to be shot and fully edited before Friday. I'm doing pretty well - shooting and editing 9 and 10 today, 11 and 12 tomorrow ... edit EVERYTHING else on Wednesday. BOOM! Delivered before Friday.
How did I get this job? Social media!!!! This duderino who is the executive producer on it saw all of the shizzy shiznat I was doing with the site and all my little mini-adventures, and he hired me. What does this teach us?
<editorsnote> At the time of this post there are only 5 of the 12 episodes posted. Not sure if they're going to roll them out, or what - but just so you know each season had 12 whatever Comcast wants to air is their thang - girlfriend got PAID!!!! </editorsnote>
Wednesday, September 7, 2011 at 9:01AM
