#WTF: About the last 24 hours ... can I get a rundown? (brunch w @daveholmes, cussed out by cabbie, knife fight)

So, yesterday was Gay Pride Day here in West Hollywood. It is literally the greatest day ever as Santa Monica blvd is shut down and 400K of your closest new friends come out and play with their self expression and self exploration.

@AmandaEBoyle and I had met up with these British boys over at Saddle the night before, and because they didn't have access to their cells we agreed to meet up at the Hudson at 1pm so we could show them around the parade.

This is one of the dudes, btw ...

Me thinks he's going to like the parade!!

So, we then peaced out of the house and walked down Santa Monica arriving at the Hudson right before the arranged meeting time. Before we walked in though I saw this little girl who got REALLY excited when a drag queen walked by her. Instead of her parents being upset at the little girl's excitement they encouraged her to run up and give her a hug.

It seems like such a small moment, but it absolutely floored me and I almost cried. This little girl has NO IDEA how cool her parents are for being so accepting. My mom and dad taught me growing up to love everyone unconditionally ... ALWAYS. I wasn't allowed to make fun of anyone, and if someone had a disability or was in need in some capacity my parents would reprimand my brother and me if we didn't offer a hand.

I had NOOOOO idea obviously growing up how much that UNCONDITIONAL level of love and acceptance would shape my life - and even my business. Way to go mom and dad for being so awesome!!!

<tangent> To this DAY I cannot wrap my brain around the fact that gays do not have equal rights regarding marriage. Literally ... I can't even speak on it - I'm just so shocked and it is entirely outside of my frame of consciousness. (Besides you know there are SO many producers out there that would love to make Gay Divorce Court, and Groomzilla.) </tangent>

We then kick it at the Hudson and unfortunately don't see our British boys.

::sad panda::

We then agree to just grab a table and enjoy in the wonderful bottomless mimosas.

Dudes, the Hudson is LEGIT on those, btw!! Normally places have like one ounce of champagne and the rest OJ ... WHOOOOIIIEEEEE ... not the Hudson, I was DEFINITELY feeling the bubbles.

A few minutes into us sitting and chatting ... @itsmejoolie was there btw with her new beau who is pretty awesome ...

Nice photobomb btw from the ginger. Watch out, she might be stealing your soul.

Anyway, a few minutes into us sitting there chatting I look over to the table next to me and spot a familiar face. I am an EAGLE eye when it comes to spotting the most RANDOM and OBSCURE people. I can't tell you how many times I've gone up to someone on a reality show and said I know I know you from somewhere ...

::Insert awkward internal monologue::

I know I know this person ... think think think ... have we dated? slept together? maayybbbeeeee

Oh no, they were just on Road Rules.

Whew, that was a close one.

Meanwhile you're still standing in front of the person looking slightly constipated from thinking so hard. You then casually remove yourself from the area as you then avoid that person for the duration of your time at the grocery store.

I knew I knew this guy .... I then whispered into Amanda's ear, is that Dave Holmes from MTV?

She looks over ... replying, I think so.

I then search Dave Holmes on twitter into google and pull up his feed.

He makes mention of being at the Hudson.

I FREAAAKKKKK out saying omg omg omg omg it IS him!! He's an MTV VJ god!

See, Dave was the first runner up back in 1998 on Wanna be a VJ. <tangent> He actually lost out to Jesse Camp who is also from CT and my 8th grade english teacher Mr. Hart had him as a student. I was in 8th grade in 98 and I remember Mr. Hart yelling at us saying Jesse was no one we should look up to and that in class he was a horrible student. </tangent>

VJs in the 90s had the best. jobs. ever. I can't even begin to tell you how many audition tapes I sent into MTV and how baaadddllllllyyyyy I wanted to be a VJ.

Dave always seemed so warm and INCREDIBLY down to earth - he was in my living room EVERY afternoon growing up, I realized I had to say SOMETHING!!!

Instead of me being a normal human being however, I figured that twitter was my best course of action ...

Is this REALLY happening, I thought!

Dave IMMEDIATELY @replied me back, and even started waving. He then took a read at my twitter bio and we struck up a solid conversation about the time Julie and I danced on stage with Prince.

Dave is seriously one of the NICEST people ever. We talked for about 15 minutes, then they enjoyed their meal and left shortly after.

I'm excited though because I not only got a hug, but we are now following each other on twitter - and I offered to help him if he needed any social media advice. (click here to follow Dave)

WINNING!

So that happened.

I then popped back home for a bit to get my schtuff together and head on down to the bus so I could get to this social media meet up in Santa Monica.

I normally never ... ever ... go to those things, but it was with a chickadee that I spoke on an awesome panel with at the WITI summit last week.

She's from NY and was making a pitt stop in LA en route back.

I then had to walk ALLLLLLLLL the way down Santa Monica blvd to pick up the bus at Rexford because of the rescheduled routes because of the parade.

FML, I thought. Rexford is in Beverly Hills, and while it isn't exactly unwalkable (FTR, via my couch surfing days I can physically walk up to 11 miles in a 24 hour period.) it is def not going to be the easiest thing ever.

I then sat for a few minutes still taking in some of the sights from the parade, and as I did so a cabbie stopped next to me and motioned for me to get in.

Front seat, he shouted at me.

I can't tell you HOW many times I've had cabbies stop and ask if they can give me a ride somewhere - I actually just tweeted about that last week. I had yet to take one up on the offer, but I figured in that moment why not! There are 400K of my closest new friends all around, and it's still daylight - how bad can this be?

I then got in the front seat of the cab and he asked me where I was going.

Rexford, just up the street, I said.

Not a problem.

He then turns to me in kind of a skeezy way asking, so, you got boyfriend?

No, I say out of stupidity.

Really Friel, really? Being honest in situations like this is not exactly a good idea - but again I have no filter.

He then placed his hand on my leg as I quickly removed it tensing my body up. 

You gay, he asks?

No - I'm conservative I reply (excluding the partially slutty dress I was rocking of course).

Where are you from, I ask quickly changing the conversation.

Russia and Armenia.

Wow, that's quite the combo I say.

I then notice a tattoo on his left wrist.

What does your tatt say, I ask?

H.P. It is for my first love, he says with his thick accent.

Ah - how funny! I have love tattooed on my wrist!

I then show him my right wrist and he smiles.

Moments later I arrived at Rexford.

Thanks for the lift, I say getting out of the cab.

I want number, he says. I'd like to take you to Sunset and Crescent Heights for sushi.

My brain then scans the plaza there, and I realize he is talking about Sushi Dan.

Sushi Dan? You mean?

Yeah, he says.

FTR, saying "I want to take you to Sushi Dan" is like saying to a chick anywhere else in America, "I'd like to take you to Chilis for a nice dinner."

It made me laugh actually because it was so random and so ... not a date place ... but I then gave him my actual number to which he immediately calls.

I HATE IT WHEN GUYS DO THAT!!!!

He then said, I drive you to airport anytime - no charge.

Really, I thought, considering all of the traveling I do ... THAT is something I can use.

I then smile and shake his hand saying, deal!

I laugh as I got out of the cab thinking well, at least he didn't try to kill me. My curiosity has now been appeased and I have no plan on taking any more unsolicited taxi cab rides.

I then took the bus down to Santa Monica, and as I got off at third street promenade I looked up and spotted yet ANOTHER familiar face.

Holy shit, I thought, that's @helslevy!!!

I scream her name (I'm not at all subtle with friends) and she looks up and smiles.

JEN!!!!

We then kick it for a bit as we talk about life, love, and all things social media.

I then realized I was pretty late for my event so we embraced and I walked the final half mile to Casa Del Mar.

The meet up was pretty cool all around. Again, I hate hate hate going to those things normally because people pitch you on projects and it all comes out as nails on chalkboard to me. I'm GENUINELY never mad at it, people have to follow their passions, but I can't tell you how many times I hear - "but what is the return on twitter, really?" It's like COMMMEEEEE ONNNNNNNN people you can't think of it that way - twitter is a utility, like the telephone!!!!! One person can use it one way and have absolute success with it, but it's NOT cookie cutter and there are a TON of variables when it comes to the desired level of engagement and communication brands/ platforms/ people should use.

It miffs my muffin and I'm too passionate to not get REALLY heated at parties. One woman admitted to using bots and I screamed NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO you're doing twitter wrongggggggggg!!!

Ugh, fail.

I'm even right now turning a little red typing this out. I understand people don't "get it" but those that do REALLY do and THOSE are the people I want to kick it with.

As always though, I was grateful for the debates and inspired by learning from people that I normally don't get to kick it with.

My buddy then walked me back to my bus stop and sometime around midnight I called it a night.

I sat at the bus stop and flipped on my iTunes, and the first song that came up was this ...

I placed my hoodie on and over my head to get a bit more "on the DL."

I started lip syncing the words at the bus stop and I then realized how white I am. There is nothing in this song I can relate to. The hoods of what, West Hartford Connecticut?? Could I BE more of a cracker?

Whatever, I thought - this is gangster, it's midnight, you're sitting alone at a bus stop in Santa Monica.

I then feel a tap on my shoulder, I turn around.

Hi, says a guy on a bike.

Where are you going?

Home, I reply.

No, you're too pretty to go home alone.

HA! I said, you have no idea what you're getting yourself into with that comment. (read this post dedicated to all future beaus)

He then lifts up his shirt and shows me a 1" wound on his forearm.

The beat of the song still playing on my partially misplaced headphones, I can hear the bumping of "minute after minute, hour after hour" as he says, I got stabbed tonight.

Wait, WHAT, I say???

Yeah, a homeless guy just came up and stabbed me. It's looking better now, he said casually.

Dude, you have to go to the hospital.

I'll live, he said.

Dude, no, seriously, you have to get a shot to make sure it doesn't get infected.

See, when I got hit in the head with the brick I had three shots. Two were numbing agents for when I had to get the staples and the third was a tetnus shot to make sure the wound wouldn't get infected.

While this guy's arm was definitely starting to clot and heal, it was still obviously very fresh and depending on what he got stabbed with could get a MASSIVE infection.

GO. TO. THE. HOSPITAL. I say sternly.

I'm fine, he said as he began pedaling. I wouldn't mind though if you wanted to take me.

Hahaha, hell no, I thought - but nice try.

The bus then rounded the corner and as I got on my phone started ringing.

It was the cabbie.

Ah, fuck, I thought. I don't want to deal with this right now.

I let it go to voicemail.

Seconds later, he calls back.

and again ...

and again ...

and again ...

I then notice that he called earlier in the evening too - but I obviously didn't hear because I was at the event.

I look down and also see I have a text from him.

He's a very digital motherfucker, I thought.

I open up the text message which he sent at 9:41 ...

I'm pretty sure he meant to type Fuck. You. It's kinda funny though how he delivered it, I can hear his Russian/ Armenian accent clear as day ... haha this guy is so pissed we're not going to Sushi Dan's. 

Well done, Friel.

My phone continued to ring for the entire bus ride back - and again, I let it all go to voicemail.

I then safely got back home and passed out.

So, that was my Sunday. How was yours?

#thatisall

#TakingNotes: Should Chicks Carry Condoms?

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Laurel. She's hands down one of the most candid and matter of fact people that I have ever digitally met. For reals, this chick is not only a hustler, but hella smart and digs breaking things down for peeps to help them understand ... I heart her long time. I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT Laurel!! </editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @QuickieChick

I know… nothing feels as good as skin on skin. But, really, is the post-sex stress REALLY worth the 2 minutes (if it’s a quickie)- 60 minutes (if it’s a full on romp) of coital bliss? No it’s not. As much as it may SEEM worth it while you’re in the moment. It’s not. Ok?

In fact, it’s kind of like chocolate cake (or whatever your favorite bad for you food is). In that weak moment when the idea of eating the entire cake is wholly enticing, in fact you are even able to totally justify it… if you decide to give in and eat that cake, the next day, if not mere minutes after, you regret it. I mean full on “what the F**k was I thinking?” regret.

Same goes with riding bare back. Chicks, it is NOT HIS RESPONSIBILITY TO MAKE SURE YOU ARE SAFE! Sure, if you are in a serious, monogamous relationship with someone, you have both been tested, you know about and are ok with the potential consequences of unprotected sex (yes, even pulling out is NOT fail proof!!!!!), then do what you want, making a decision in a sane, calm, not in-the-heat-of the… moment.

The weird thing is, I have always been embarrassed to go to the market, pick out, stand in line, place on the belt, and purchase condoms. I’m not a prude, but for some reason I feel embarrassed standing there with the little box in my hand, as if they are screaming out to everyone around that I’m a slut because I’m having sex. Instead of advertising my sex life to the other shoppers in line, I generally sneak to the back of the store and buy my condoms from the pharmacist (there’s usually a shorter line and it’s substantially more private). But why?

There is nothing wrong with buying condoms. In fact, it’s the responsible thing for chicks to do. Why is it the man’s role? Just because it’s an item that goes on him, it’s an item that goes in you and, in my opinion, it’s protecting you more than it is protecting him. Afterall, aside from STDS, sex without protection can get you pregnant and you, not he, is the one carrying that child for 9 months!

If you’re more comfortable, sure, buy your condoms from the pharmacist, hold them in your hand until it’s time to ring them up, then immediately slip them into your purse once purchased. It’s better than the not wearing them at all. I mean really. You may feel stressed or shy walking up to the clerk to make that embarrassing, pleasure-making purchase, but imagine how you would feel if you chose to skip the rubber and ended up pregnant or with an STD instead. It’s time for chicks to take charge.

Then comes the question of where to put them. Do you keep them in your bedside table, in your bathroom hidden in the back corner under the sink, in a cute little hand crocheted satchel under your bed? What if you’re not home when you’re in the mood to do the deed? Then what? Then do you depend on him to be responsible? In that “just in case” scenario, carry condoms in your purse! I know, you don’t want the, again, embarrassing scenario of the little guys accidentally slipping out of your purse for all to see, so instead I carry them in a discreet little mirrored compact with a secret condom compartment appropriately called “just in case.” It’s my private life. No one else needs to know. But I do need to protect myself… just in case.

And besides, there are some definite benefits to carrying your own condoms:

-1. You can choose to use the ribbed kind. Sure they’re a little more expensive, but they are designed to increase YOUR pleasure. Guys just feel the inside of the rubber so whether the outside has ribs or not… really not their concern.

-2. You can be sure that the condoms are properly cared for, therefore maintaining their structural and protective integrity. You might not realize, but condoms do have expiration dates and they can get seriously damaged from braving the elements- like sitting in some dude’s hot car for too long, or

being stuck inside his wallet for a year.

-3. You are instantly in the driver’s seat, which is honestly pretty damn sexy… even intimidatingly so (which is a good thing).

So next time that you are in the throws of passion and your guys says “shit, I don’t have a condom… is that ok?” You can say, “oh don’t worry about it, I’ve got one- just in case!”

#nerdsunite

click here to follow Laurel on twitter and don't forget to check out her site over yonder!!

#NerdsUnite: The secret life of a veterinary technician

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Lindsay. She and I met ... well, somewhere in the social space. I think we might have started talking through this site directly, then through facebook - maybe ... I'm not sure. But she's awesome. I talk to her on twitter almost every day, and she's really rad and TOTALLY a big huge animal lover. Like crazy huge!! In these series of posts she will be talking about her life and random adventures with sometimes more than two legged creatures. I guess there's only one more thing left to say ... HIT IT LINDSAY!!</editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @TheCraftafarian

This post is not for people who think of pets as *just* a cat or dog or whatever animal. For some people they are family members and they are deserving of such respect. 

Today was a rough day. Ok to be honest this last week has been kind of rough. I've been having headaches and migraines on and off for about two weeks now, it's probably the weather. Here in Florida it’s been overcast and rainy almost every day. It sucks but we really need the rain, or so I'm told.

Anyway, some of you guys may remember back in February when I wrote the post "In Memory." It was for a client of mine who had passed away. I had become pretty close with the family over the last almost two years of nursing their kitties back to health and pet sitting for them. The family is clients of my clinic and of my pet sitting business (and now I'm glad to call them friends). I have spent many evenings syringing food into their cats mouths and medicating them. They've invited me over for dinner and drinks. They are just genuinely the kindest people I've ever met and when Don passed away my heart ached for them. Today we had to euthanize one of their kitties and I feel like a part of me is missing. Actually right now I feel really numb and its taken me hours to get myself together and right this post. The wonderful kitty named Cally lived to almost 17 years old with a number of ailments including cancer. She never suffered, her mom always made sure that if it got to that point we would let her go peacefully. That day was today. She was a diva, a princess, a silly little grouch, but we all loved her.

This is an old photo that the daughter posted on Facebook today. We should all remember Cally plump and happy. 

Thank you Cally for every moment of happiness you gave your mom and rest of your family. I know you waited as long as you could after your daddy died, your mommy needed you. Even though you were sick and felt so bad, I know you recognized my voice and purred, for that I will never be the same.

#nerdsunite

Click here to follow Lindsay on Twitter!

#NerdsUnite: E3 on the DL ... word!

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Sean. He has a really rad site called Violent Gamer, and he's here today to talk about some of the latest and greatest in the gaming industry. I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT SEAN !!</editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @violent_gamer

A Short Look at E3 2012
Every year the Electronic Gaming Expo, E3, comes to Los Angeles and it is often the biggest gaming event of the year. It is a press only event, for the most part, but there are students, exhibitors and others wondering around as well. For three days we get to explore the two giant halls of the Los Angeles Convention center and take a look at the biggest games and electronics. There is usually a bunch of smaller developers attached to some of the big publishers like Microsoft or Sony, but for some reason this year there were far fewer indie developers. Adam and I both have had a ton of fun and learned about a great many games, despite Kinect being everywhere and irrelevant presentations all over the place. We also managed to record over an hour of gameplay from many of the games all over the floor. I just wanted to write a little and share some of what we have written about so far, plus show a few videos and some highlights.

Before we were even on the floor of E3 we ran into one of my favorite nerds out there, Wil Wheaton. He is known for quite a few things, but most recently he has been doing his own show on Felicia Day's Geek and Sundry website and Youtube channel. Every two weeks Wil Wheaton does an episode of TableTop. In the show he brings three celebrities in, big and small, and gets them to play a board game with him. He also explains whatever board game they are playing beforehand and while they play. It is an interesting and enjoyable show for anyone who loves board games and really enjoys seeing how people go about. Anyways, it turns out he is a really nice guy and doesn't mind talking to fellow nerds like us. He even stopped long enough to take a picture with us.

Once we got onto the floor of E3 and started checking out games we ended up bumping into Felicia Day as well, but we didn't want to go bother her and her entourage of friends. After that we wandered into Sony's section of the floor and took a look at the role playing game Ni No Kuni, the new Devil May Cry, the smash brothers style fighter Playstation-All Stars, God of War Ascenson and Little Big Planet: Karting. We managed to get up videos for most of those games and Adam wrote something up for Playstation All-Stars: Battle Royale. Our favorite game from the first day of E3 had to have been Planetside 2. It is a free to play first person shooter that puts a huge amount of players on some fairly massive continents and let's them fight over outposts and territories. It is a faction based game and you choose from three factions to fight for. You jump into this futuristic world and customize everything. You can take the skies into bombers and air transports, run over some infantry in tanks or troop transports, or choose one of six infantry classes to fight with. It has been in development by Sony Online Entertainment for quite some time and even though it is free to play, a price model that is usually awful, it is looking to be quite good. They have a beta going for the game right now and we will be writing more about it as we dive into that, but anyone can sign up and try to get access to the beta over at their website. Adam also wrote something up on Planetside 2 and our short time with it at E3 if you would like to read a bit more about it.

We will be doing a bunch more E3 related write-ups throughout the next couple of days, so keep an eye on our website, Twitter or Facebook if you would like to read about any of that. If you are interested in seeing some games in action we have over thirty videos over on our Youtube page from E3 and one of my favorites is posted below. If you want to check out the whole E3 2012 playlist head on over. This video is from Aliens: Colonial Marines, a game based on the Aliens universe, and they had a small multiplayer demo at E3 where one side played the Aliens while the others took control of a squad of Marines. Adam and I played the game and Brian Royce at Gearbox Software, the developers of Aliens: Colonial Marines, played on the Aliens team against us with several other Gearbox developers. Needless to say they absolutely destroyed us and it was a blast. If you are interested in the game you can visit their website or check out the three or four other videos we have of Aliens: Colonial Marines on our Youtube Playlist.

Thanks for reading this little post about E3 and if you are interested in anything else gaming related, or E3 related, Violent Gamer is ready and willing to be perused.

#nerdsunite

#RealDeal: Getting blown off really ... really ... hurts

OMMMMMGGGGGG I need to stop crying long enough to be able to type this out.

Fucking. Men.

I'm so pissed right now and traditionally I am not a reactive person but there I go again letting my guard down and ::poof:: my fucking heart gets broken ... AGAIN. The documentation of all of this is what kills me too because there I have this constant tangible evidence that I am really really really bad at something even though I am DESPERATELY trying to better myself in the process.

Hold on ... need song ...

AHHH the cranberries. yes yes and more yes.

Alrite, so I mentioned yesterday how fearful I was about this upcoming weekend. See, I've been dating this guy since April and he wanted to take everything super slow. Not a problem, I thought, I can actually learn from this experience and get to know someone before jumping right into bed.

The dude is a SUPER romantic and genuinely one of the greatest guys I've ever dated. He's super passionate about his work, already achieved his personal level of success, so smart, so cute ... total package head to toe.

We've seen each other a couple times a week for the last month - and everything has been great. Dudes, he even let me pick the movie last week and he actually said yes to when I wanted to see "What to expect when you're expecting."

Guys I've dated have never let me pick the movie so as trivial as it sounds it was kind of a big deal for me.

He then dropped me off at my friend's going away party, (he had to wake up early the next morning so he couldn't come) and right before he let me out we totally made out like the world was ending.

It was spec-fucking-tacular and actually one of the hottest things sexually I've ever experienced (even though we did not have sex it came close ... damn ... close).

He said in the car that he wanted everything to be really special for when we finally had sex - he's a total romantic.

I totally got that ... fine ... I can be a patient grasshopper ... not a problem ...

We then talked about it and said the following weekend we'd make it happen. He even picked me up at the airport on Monday and we talked about it in the car - again. I said I was looking forward to it, and while Buddhism teaches you to not have expectations with things, I was getting REALLY excited to finally be with this guy and especially in the romantic manner in which he had painted this experience for me.

I thought about it all week ... got excited ... but then today I still hadn't heard anything so I texted him.

Here's the exchange:

See, he works in finance so he has to be literally at his desk by 6 am when the market opens on the east coast. Anytime we've kicked it during the week he has to go home early so a Sunday night "date" isn't really what I had in mind since it meant we'd have to call it a super early evening.

I then stared down at the text wondering if I was over reacting. I TOTALLY admit that I am obviously EXTREMELY sensitive on the issue of getting blown off like this, so I was attempting to stay as neutral as possible and see both sides of things.

The more I did that however, the more angry I got. Was he not looking forward to this as much as I was? This is also the second time he's blown me off for dinner in the last few weeks - if this is how he is at just courting a girl what the fuck is the actual relationship going to look like?

I then remembered my theme with the Modern Day Shaman, and how he tells me I need to be better at speaking my personal truth.

I sent this back ...

Now I don't know what to do. I'm CRAZY about this guy but this is the SECOND time he's blown off a date with me.

At what point do you have self respect and just say, next! Statstically speaking I am extremely aware of how many "fishes there are in the sea" ... but I really really really liked this one.

Why the FUCK do guys have to make this shit so difficult?? HE was the one that painted this picture in my noggin - I didn't expect anything fancy pants I just wanted to spend time with him when his schedule wasn't so limiting.

Is this really too much to ask for? Am I COMPLETELY overreacting by feeling this way?? I TOTALLY GET how sensitive I am when it comes to this stage of dating, but I literally don't even know what to say back.

The old me would just say fuck it - go put on a slutty dress and have a night out on the town. The new "looking to settle down" me is COMPLETELY over all of that.

I don't know what to do, I'm really hurt by the whole thing and I genuinely don't have a clue if it is hurt because of my past or if this shit genuinely DOES suck and other people would feel this way if this happened to them.

Help ... please ... give it to me like it is ... I can handle it ... I think.

#thatisall