<editorsnote>Hi, I'm Jen Friel, and we here at TNTML examine the lives of nerds outside of the basements and into the social media, and dating world. We have over 75 peeps that write about their life in real time. (Real nerds, real time, real deal.) Sit back, relax, and enjoy some of the stories!!</editorsnote>
I got in yesterday after a relatively eventful evening at the airport. I spent all afternoon and night Saturday meeting up with you fanstastically awesome people, in addition to then crashing at the airport but making besties with one of the security guards and him giving me the tip that I should just crash at the Sheraton. I then did, and wound up getting kicked out but only after I had started talking to the dude that took my virginity. We were trying to arrange a super fast meet up before my flight, but alas, it didn't end up working out.
Sad panda.
So, I'm in Colorado until super early Tuesday morning for a date and so far I'm having a blast. Colorado is so, so, sooooooo beautiful!!! LOOK!!!
It's also a LOT warmer than I expected. I totally thought I was going to freeze here and instead it's warmer than it was in Connecticut!
I'm also shocked at how well I am adjusting to the fact that I've been in three different time zones in three days but everything truly is mind over matter and the more I just focus on the time my cell phone says the easier this adjustment has become.
This is what I'm jamming to right now on spotify, btw ... it's slowly becoming a potential all time fav song.
Hope everyone is having a rockin morning and if anyone is in Colorado and wants to meet up I'll def try to make it happen. Tweet me! @JenFriel xoxo
I just had the fucking time of my life last night. Incredible, incredible time and there was genuinely only one dude in my entire class that was a prick (and I am planning on publicly shaming him for it).
Awwww schnap.
For the first time in years, I actually came close to having a panic attack this week.
I don't want to do this, I lamented to my best friend over coffee, but I know I have to.
I left West Hartford a decade ago, and it wasn't exactly on the best terms ... I left out of fear.
Back in 2002 I was being stalked, and the girls were RELENTLESS. I couldn't go anywhere without one of them showing up so rather than stay around for something to happen - I moved to NYC.
Obvi, too, it was where the direction of my career was going to take me, but either way I bolted from this town. I never fit in, I never felt like I belonged and the stalking was just the icing on the cake of the ass kick I needed to leave. (I only stayed in NY for a year before moving out to LA.)
In the 9 years I've lived in LA I only came back to West Hartford once. (I was filming a TV show for comcast and I was producer on the project as well so to keep costs down I bunked in with a buddy who has a house here.) It was bittersweet being back. I was grateful to see a handful of my friends, but there was this lingering distaste and bitterness from never fitting in and resenting everyone for it.
I need to let this all go, I thought to myself. I can't move forward with my life until I make peace with this town and all the people in it. I need to let go of the anger I still have at feeling forced to leave and for still to this day feeling so afraid to come back.
Going to this reunion was a really big deal for me. I knew it wasn't going to be easy, but I had to put on my big girl pants and deal.
I decided to prep for the evening though I would need a solid pre-game.
I then hit up my buddy Dan on Facebook asking if we could kick it.
That'd be great, he said.
He then picked me up at the airport and we kicked it over at the Elbow Room all day.
Because my hometown is pretty small, a few people from high school peppered in throughout the day.
You're so and so I said to this one girl who was a grade above us and super popular.
Hello, she said, with an attitude.
I then turned and laughed. Yep, still a bitch.
After a lot of drinks, water, coffee, and a meal Dan and I then headed over to the reunion. Because I was in charge of music, we were the first to arrive.
I then set up my 90s nostalgia playlist on Spotify and moments later people started to arrive.
Deep breaths, I thought. Deep breaths.
I then started talking to some people and immediately all of my cares and stresses were erased.
Everyone was so chill and the conversations were surprisingly awesome. Pretty much everyone had heard what I had been up to with this site, so it was great cutting through all the bullshit and just asking people what they were super passionate about.
It's so inspiring reading what you do, said one classmate.
Thank you so so much, I said back.
Over and over and over, person after person ... the love blew me away.
Holy shit, I thought. What I'm doing must be a pretty big deal. This is West Fucking Hartford, people don't give a flying fuck about anything other than themselves and their appearance. To receive this kind of adoration was jarring and COMPLETELY unexpected.
I caught myself a few times tearing up.
This is a really beautiful moment, I thought as I could physically feel the hate in my heart lifting.
I then went up to the bar to get another drink and on my way over I thought I saw my old neighbor.
Hi Brian, I said approaching. So good to see you.
I'm not Brian, she said.
What? I said back barely able to hear.
I'm so and so she said.
Wait, who?
I'm so and so she said.
I then realized that one of my classmates had had a sex change and I've now referred to her as a him and my foot IMMEDIATELY wanted to go into my mouth.
Realizing there was no getting "out" of this conversation gracefully, I decided to literally just turn around and strike up a conversation with two other people in the group.
You need to not be here right now, I thought.
I then did an about face and just peaced out.
I live in West Hollywood and I consider myself a try-sexual (try anything once). I am genuinely the most open minded person on the planet and I felt really really really bad.
Shake it off. Shake it off.
I then went back up to the bar and was greeted by two friends.
I have an open marriage, one of them admitted almost immediately.
Being a lifecaster means everyone knowing all the weird shit that I do. By reading what I'm into others will just blurt out all the weird shit that they're into since they know its safe to talk to me about it.
What are the boundaries around that, I asked?
We've been together for 9 years so it just works for us. We can both have girlfriends or boyfriends.
Wow, I said. It's not strictly for sexual purposes, you also have emotional connections?
Yes, she said.
The other classmate then starts laughing. You sound like Guliana Rancic.
Thank you, I said laughing. I'm just curious.
The girls then left and then one of my crushes approached.
You're really beautiful, he said to me slurring.
Thank you, I said back.
And you're sweet, he said almost falling over.
I started laughing as I thought I could TOTALLY have sex with you if I wanted to.
The 12 year old inside of me laughed as I realized that was one fantasy I would never want to live out.
It was good seeing you, I said touching his shoulder as I walked away.
SWOON!!!! NEED. TO. HAVE. YOUR. BABIES. I thought.
Let's go to the after party, he said. It's over at Butterfly.
Okay, I said.
I then grabbed my backpack from the back room and climbed into the truck with my world civ crush and another dude I went to school with.
Both are equally gorgeous, FTR, but high school crushes die hard.
It took EVERYTHING in me to not jump his bones then and there. There's something so innocently corruptible about him. I want to do the naughtiest things to this guy AND then grab breakfast in the morning. I would date this guy in a HEARTBEAT if he lived in LA.
A few minutes later we ended up at the Butterfly (which is this chinese restaurant inside West Hartford center that has a pretty happening bar and karaoke).
Then the inevitable happened ...
we all started singing Let It Be.
There were about 15 of us, and man ... drunken Beatles songs may not have sounded great, but bonding felt pretty awesome.
LETTTT ITTTT BBBEEEEEEE, I sang.
We were then kicked out moments later, and I crashed at my friend Steph's place.
This morning, I woke up still in my party dress and went downstairs to get a glass of water.
I see her step-dad in the kitchen.
Hello, I said introducing myself.
He starts laughing as I ask where the glasses were.
Over there, he pointed.
I then filled up my glass laughing to myself as I ran up the stairs. I feel like I'm 13 again and her step-dad is going to assume that I am a "bad influence."
Oh West Hartford.
I then grabbed breakfast with a group of friends this morning and we all recapped our experiences.
I couldn't stop smiling, laughing, and blabbing semi-incoherently.
There is so much love here, I thought.
I don't know if this is a good thing or not, I said to the group, but I thought this was going to suck and everything about last night was surprisingly awesome. Everyone was SO NICE and sweet except for Elliot M...z.
I love him, said one of the girls.
He's still a prick, I said. I feel like he plucks the eye lashes off of baby giraffes for shits and giggles. He's just not a nice human being.
And there you have it. I'm currently kicking it over in West Hartford center before I have to head to the airport this evening for my date in Colorado in the morning. I'm not quite sure how sexy sexy I'm going to feel stepping off a plane after sleeping in the airport for the night, but I'll figure out a way to own it.
Thanks again to everyone from my class that made last night truly spectacular. I never thought I'd say this, but I'm genuinely going to miss a lot of you.
Peace out West Hartford. I leave this place now with a lot of love in my heart and if anyone ever wants a place to stay in LA, please hit me up!! I promise to show you all a good time.
When I was 16, I vividly remember sitting at this super long table with my dad, his buddy (our lead attorney), and the stalker's lawyers going over the stipulations in the protective order.
300 yards, it states. If you know Jennifer Friel is at a location you must immediately remove yourself.
Normally, for a protective order it expires however, and my father wanted to make sure I would be able to go to all of my high school reunions.
You never know where the girls will be 10 years from now, one of the attorneys protested.
I remember my dad laughing (my dad is an attorney, and a DAMN good one), and saying - my daughter graduated high school. Did you ask your clients if they did? They have NO right to be at any reunions in the future.
What ended up happening?
I got the lifetime protective order from all 4 of the girls. (1 of them did graduate btw. She was the only one and she bowed out of everything pretty early choosing to just sign that she would stay away from me for literally the rest of my life.)
Tomorrow, and all this weekend really, isn't even about doing the whole "look at me now" thing. I very frankly couldn't give a flying fuck. This moment, and this experience is for the 16 year old that genuinely thought she was going to die on a daily basis because of these people. I allowed myself to live in this CONSTANT state of fear. Now, I'm not afraid.
I feel an enormous amount of empathy for them though in my process to try to understand what could make 17 year olds snap like that. Again, I played my part, but NONE of that experience was normal.
As far as everyone else goes, I'm just game to party, man. I'm pretty stoked to kick it with the people and not the projections I placed on them as a child.
There's a really big part of me that just wants to put on my big girl pants and get this shit over with.
I have no family in West Hartford anymore, so this is genuinely my last time back. Such a big chapter closing.
My only question is, why does this make me feel so sad?
I got played. Well, technically speaking it wasn't necessarily being "played" it just ended really really awkwardly and for the first time in at least two years I'm in an epic state of confusion.
So, a few weeks back, I got hit up by the publicist for the Playboy Mansion inviting me out to grab drinks.
Not a problem, I thought. The dude seemed really rad, might as well go out just the two of us.
Because he never mentioned discussing business (guys will ALWAYS say, "hey I like what you do, I'd love to talk about it over drinks) I immediately assumed it was a date.
I arrived a few minutes after the dude and while we were standing in line he got a text from another client of his.
I'm behind you, read the text.
My date then turned around and then greeted his alarmingly attractive client.
HEEYYYYY!! He said welcoming, as he introduced me.
Hello, I replied back cautious to not get caught staring into his dreamy eyes.
We then go and grab drinks (my date pays), and go and sit down in a corner booth, the three of us.
The guys then started chatting back and forth as I was sitting in-between them sipping my wine.
My date's client was extremely extroverted and had this charismatic personality that instantly read "playboy."
I HATE playboys. I used to date them in my early 20s, and they just breathe this air of douchiness. (It was in fact that exact pattern that I was looking to break when I signed up for OKC.)
What do you do? I asked the playboy.
I work at a startup, he said.
He's being modest, said my date. He's part of a big start up in Silicon Beach.
Rad, I said.
We then kept talking and the playboy was clearly dominating the conversation and actively flirting with me.
Out of respect for my date, I kept touching his arm and didn't appease the flirtation.
This is kinda awkward, I thought.
My date then started commenting on how hot some women were.
Ruh roh, I thought. This is getting all shades of weird.
A round of shots were then ordered as girls came over to the table.
My date then stands up. Alrite, I'm out of here. Please take care of her, he says to the playboy.
I then hug my date goodbye and thank him for the drinks and time spent.
I sit back down next to the playboy.
What did you think of his pitch, he asked?
What do you mean pitch? I said. I think he felt bad because you interrupted our date.
He laughs stopping me.
You thought that was a date?
I'm not sure, I said.
Dude, he's almost married.
Eh?
Yeah, he's with someone.
That's strange, I said. Normally if a guy has a girlfriend he addresses it quickly or at least establishes that this was a business thing. I don't have a dog in the fight nor do I care either way, but I thought it was pretty funny how you just swooped right in.
We then spent the evening drinking, talking, and laughing.
He's so easy to talk to, I thought, and so smart!! This guy is a catch.
We then closed the bar down and he walked me back to my bus stop.
I had a lot of fun, I said.
He then leaned in and kissed me.
SWOON!!! amazing, amazing kisser.
We then arranged to meet up the next night as I was about to travel to SF.
The next night we went to dinner at the Foundry room on Melrose, and I immediately became consumed in this guy.
Maybe I read this wrong, I thought. He's talking at great lengths about consciousness, his family, dog ... the conversation flowed so freely. I forgot I was on a first date.
How old are you? I asked breaking the conversation.
26, he said.
SHIT! I thought. I could have pegged him based on his wisdom at at LEAST 32.
SHIT SHIT SHIT!!! Guys aren't datable in LA until they are 30. Maybe I need to rewrite some of my rules, I thought. Stay open minded, Friel.
We continued bantering back and forth even getting the waiter involved. He then sits down next to us and shows us pictures of his girlfriend and tells us the story of how they met.
How sweet, we both said.
Let me buy you guys a round of drinks, said the server. You are both so nice and you are my favorite table of the evening.
We stared at each other.
That's extremely generous of you, I said. Thank you.
We then kicked it with the waiter for a bit before hitting the dance floor.
He even took care of the check while I was away so there wouldn't be an argument on who pays.
This guy is a class act, I thought.
We then grabbed a cab back to my place, and we made out like the world was ending.
I didn't even tell him to come inside, it was more of a continued make out sesh.
We then make it to my bedroom (a place I very very rarely let guys into), and we have a 9th grade make out session. Translation: Everything before sex.
We were both then very satisfied and fell asleep cuddling.
The next morning we continued to make out, and the entire thing was so erotic.
I've been so sterile to guys for so long wanting to stay "by the rules" and keep things at a distance sexually focusing on getting to know the person.
Our chemistry though, was UNDENIABLE!! I couldn't keep my hands off the guy.
Fuck, I thought. What is this guy doing to me?
He then left and a few days later I went to SF for two different trips.
By the time I got back and got settled in a week later, I texted him asking how he was doing.
A few hours later he texted back indicating that his family had been in town.
Great! I said. I love it when my parents are in town. Hope you guys had fun!
I then got hit up by my buddy who was in town from SF letting me know he was hosting a get together. Because "the playboy" also worked for a start up, I figured these two should meet if they already haven't.
While I was at the bar, I texted him inviting him out.
As I put the phone down, I see my friend.
We embrace.
As I am hugging my friend, I see the playboy walk in.
The time between me texting him and his arrival was less than 10 minutes so there was NO way he was just dropping in.
Shit, of course we're in the same social circle. Totally makes sense.
I then say hello as I stand up from my seat.
The playboy is noticeably awkward.
Don't be this guy, I thought.
I then talked with the group (there were approximately 12 of us), and I could feel this INCREDIBLE tension between the playboy and I. He wouldn't look me in the eye, nor did we even speak for the entire evening.
Around midnight I was tired, so we peaced. He waved good bye.
So weird, I thought. So so weird.
Now normally in a situation like this, either party might text the other person to crack a joke, or to say yeah that was strange ... some sort of SOMETHING to at least keep a connection.
I got radio silence.
It wasn't my place to text to be honest. I would have normally, but I wasn't the weird one in this scenario. I would have talked to him, I have absolutely no shame and can keep things comfortable and on the DL.
This was last Monday. It is now a week later and Tuesday, still no text or call.
Yesterday, I had coffee with my best friend, Steph.
You're not going to believe this, I said to her over an upside down caramel macchiato (aka my new favorite drink ever). I had this AH-MAZING first date with this guy and he got so weird after.
Who is it? she asked.
He works at this start up. (I then told her which one.)
SHUT UP!!! She said. Who from over there?
I then told her.
OMG I dated one of their developers. All of those guys are playboys.
I stare back at her with dead eyes. Oh yes, I know, I said.
I'm confident enough to know that this wasn't me, but the signals he was sending threw me. If a dude just wants to get some he doesn't bring up the things this guy was bringing up. I'm not mad at the fact that we hooked up but I feel like I was on a strange bait and switch. I wouldn't have let him in my room nor spend the night if it was just that.
Sorry girl, she lamented.
Meh, shit happens. I just feel really stupid.
Yeah, she said. I know the guy and he is charismatic, it's hard not to fall for it.
But I'm a professional dater!!! How could I fall for something so elementary???
Annnnnddd there you have it, nerds. Silicon Beach is the smallest big town ever, and apparently I found the start up with the biggest playboys - aka my worst nightmare.
All of it disinterests me. I obvi have a rebound rate of .25 seconds, but I don't think I would have hooked up with him if I had known he was so tight in my circle. Now I'm going to have to see him at event after event.
I made my bed, now I gotta lay in it.
THIS IS WHY I DON'T DATE YOUNGER!!!! MEN ARE NOT DATEABLE IN LA UNTIL THEY ARE 30! PERIOD END OF SENTENCE!!!
<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy LaShaun. We play trivia together every Tuesday, and HOLY HELL this dude is good!! For reals, he knows a lot of random things, and is genuinely also a rad human being. I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT LASHAUN!!! </editorsnote>
#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @Maj_G
Author's note: This is actually a game I discovered by being on E3's press newsletter. I meant to write about it after the convention, but life got in the way. I was further compelled to write about this when I was invited to their office in Playa Vista for a one-on-one demonstration of the game's capabilities. While I did get a good summary of it and a chance to play the game itself at E3, the majority of this article is based on my one-on-one with Tyler of Snail Games.
While there have been many video games that delve into Japanese culture, there have been very few that really get into specifics on Chinese culture. In fact, outside of the Dynasty Warriors series (which are based on the legendary Chinese story, Romance of the Three Kingdoms), you're hard pressed to find a game that reflects on what has been one of the longest, richest cultures in the world. There's been the official Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon game, but beyond that, not much else. Most other games that go into Chinese culture tend to use a modern-day setting, like True Crimes: Streets of LA, Wu-Tang: Shaolin Style, Stranglehold, Jackie Chan Adventures, and Rise to Honor. That's where Snail Games comes into play.
Snail Games are a small United States division of Chinese developer Suzhou Snail Electronic Company, Ltd, who focuses primarily on online gaming. While the US division hasn't been around too long, the main company has been in business for just over a decade. Despite this, they hit the ground running, winning the "China Cultural Games Overseas Development Award" 4 years in a row, "China Top 10 Game Provider" 3 years in a row, and 30 other awards from various outlets including government, media, industry, and player communities worldwide. Despite this, Snail's biggest endeavor is yet to come.
Age of Wushu (or Age of Wulin, as it's known in Europe) is quickly becoming Snail's biggest title yet. Already one of the highest ranking games in China, it is also only the second original game to secure a celebrity endorsement from a famed Chinese martial artist: Jet Li, who also endorsed and starred in the Playstation 2 cult classic, Rise to Honor (True Crimes was endorsed by Snoop Dogg, Wu-Tang by the Wu-Tang Clan, and Stranglehold & Jackie Chan Adventures were based on a movie & tv series respectively). What makes it so interesting? Well for one thing, as the title suggests, it focuses on actual martial arts rather than a hack n' slash style of combat. In other words, like many single-player games have implemented, there is a system for actively using dodging & parrying techniques rather than rolling the dice as it were and hoping the opponent misses. Another is something of a revolutionary idea in MMOs: your character does not level. Instead, as it has been seen in single-player games, skills will level. From jumping to dodging, to weapon proficiency, the more your character does an action, the better they will get at it. Not only that, but many of your character's skills can be customized as well.
Another difference between this & many MMOs is the fact that there are no classes. In their place are 8 schools including Wu-Tang (or Wudang), Shaolin, Royal Guard, and Emei. As with reality, while your character may primarily know techniques from their initial school, they can go to another school and learn skills from there. However, there may be times when learning a skill from a different school would be counter-productive for your character, such as a Shaolin-based character (who value their bodies as temples) learning Drunken-Fist skills (which as the name states, requires the character to be drunk for maximum effectiveness). The result would be self-destructive moves which would liken any battle to that of Krillin vs Perfect Cell. In true martial arts fashion, there are a myriad of weapons to choose from, such as bare-hand, single-blade, dual-wielding, daggers, hidden weapons, throwing knives, staffs, bladed staffs, and many more. On the other hand, like many modern MMOs, there are professions which characters can learn in order to make in-game money or items. Some of these include beggar, scholar, royal guard, and fortune teller. And in true "my kung fu is stronger than yours" form, you will be able to challenge your profession skills against other players. This is in addition to combat-based PVP tournaments which will be held regularly and random challenges which can be made at any time.
And what of the missions themselves? Age of Wushu, like the RPG game Dragon Age: Origins, will feature a main storyline mission that will vary depending on what your character's background and hometown are. And much like many RPG games, there be a large number of side quests. To gain access to some side quests, your character will have to have certain relationships with NPCs, usually some level of trust. An extra interesting feature this game will have is that while the player is logged off, they will have the option of leaving their character still in the game doing some sort of autopilot activity including working at a shop for in-game cash. As with an MMO, one could imagine that there a risk involved with taking this option, and there is. Malevolent players will be able to kidnap these characters and sell them into slavery, so that instead of logging back in with a surplus of money, they will have to buy their freedom before being able to go anywhere. But do not fret - kidnappers will be easily identified by a special icon over their heads and a large sack on their backs while they are in the process of doing so and do-gooders will be able to foil their plans through a battle.
Age of Wushu looks to be a fresh, exciting change to the MMO genre. The world of ancient China has captivated much of the world's population for decades. Now, for the first time, fans of China and the martial arts will get a chance to join that world. As with all of Snail's games, this will be 100% free to play, however, there will be an online store for special items and gear as well as the opportunity to preorder the game with special items & bonuses for just $9.99. Age of Wushu is currently in its first Western beta test and will start up a second beta in December before its official release in February of 2013. See more about it at www.ageofwushu.com.
Monday, November 26, 2012 at 6:00AM
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