Re: Total #Buzzkill

SOOO!! I just read @JenSquard's post ... before we continue, you can read it here. It's cool ... I'll just wait for you ... k ... ya back? COOL! Let's go on ...

@JenSquard and I come from entirely different backgrounds. Which honestly, is why I picked her to lifecast with me. I was raised in the Normal Rockwell burbs of good ol' Connecticut, with a sheltered existence, and doting parental units. Jen grew up in Colorado in circumstances she will relay to you all as she continues to lifecast - and yeah! We both ended up fucked up.

Let's just face facts here - we're all fucked up. Get over it. Life is about how you adapt to the cards you are dealt, and the attitude that pulls you through it all. Furthermore, I think "fucked up" is an entirely over used phrase. What does it really mean? I guess that depends on the color of the shades you're looking through, eh?

For reals, my parents did an awesome job of raising me. It was only my nagging curiosity of why things work the way that they do that I was born with that causes me all the problems.

Parents will never understand lifecasting. There's just no sugar coating that. My parents think I'm absolutely insane, and need to get a job. In a year, the tune hasn't changed. But I love 'em to death anyway!

I just had to keep asking myself, why do I seek this validation. I take tremendous pride in what I do, and that so many people have now come to check us out. That is all. If I take pride in what I do, and I am the one that I have to look at in the mirror everyday - I'm pretty kosher with it all.

Lifecasting requires BRUTAL honesty 24/7. It's not easy. I've disclosed incredibly personal information about myself for all of the web to see. From sex partners, to family issues, to even death ... its all been discussed. Shit ain't pretty, but it's real.

I am also consciously aware that I have nothing to lose. I don't have a hubby, or kids ... I'm single, and still mingling. Being this brutally honest with the world isn't easy. It's cost me a lot actually - I get the ANGRIEST emails from the guys I oust on OkCupid for their doucheyness. I've never been called a bitch to my face, but it is something I am prepared for if one of them finds me at a bar. I do what I do because I want to do it. That's it. The rest is sort of collateral damage. I know it's horrible to say these things so matter of fact, but its a shift in consciousness that allowed me to arrive at this place. I'm still trying to process every day what "this place" even is. Normally by the time I've processed it though, I've already moved on to yet another place in consciousness. It's a total trip. And it's been documented, which I just think is the gnarliest part about it.

So, Jen to answer your post, I can only reply with that I have no answers. I can only show the path. The mission is all your own should you choose to accept. The only two things I follow in life are "feels good" and "doesn't feel good." Lifecasting felt WAYYYYY too good to me!

Stay strong, and hold people in a place of unconditional love. You can't make them understand. You just have to let your own light shine. xoxo

#NerdsUnite

#TNTML gets real ... like really real ... prolly TMI type real

Alrite, so after great debate all week on how exactly I want to launch this project - I have come to the decision that I only want 1 other lifecaster to start in stage 1.

I follow the KISS mentality of keep it simple stupid - and honestly, this site keeps me so busy as is on the day to day, launching 4 lifecasters just doesn't make sense right now. I have to follow my gut, and training 3 other people to do my job is just going to stress me out. Jen stressed is totally not kosher for anyone's passover! Plus, I need to see how you all react, and tweak things here and there - and tweaking one other person is way easier.

I have chosen @JenSquard as the other lifecaster. One, just based on popularity. You guys love her ... and two, because she and I are SOOO different!!

@JenSquard was born the rebel, and is currently a mommy and wifey.

I on the other hand, was raised the goody goody, and a year ago said this wasn't the life for me, so I started a website.

Good girl gone bad, bad girl gone good. 2 very different lives under the same name, brought together under the keyword of nerd.

One is in the booming social space, and attempting to balance her IRL social life ... the other is in the baby booming state balancing the duties of being a wife, mother, and photographer. Each in their own jungles, battling their own day to day lions and wildebeests.

I can't deny the angst that I feel for tradition, that's my constant. I just have to figure out a way to add value to that and not alienate the audience.

This is a total dream come true, and I can't think of anyone who could be a better fit for this then @JenSquard. YAY!!

Stay tuned nerds ... it's gettin good!

#nerdsunite

Requirements for #LifeCasting

You have no idea how difficult it can be to break down a situation enough to figure out why it worked the way that it worked. I know this shit works, I've been doing it for a while - but still ... need formula. What is intuitive for me, will definitely not be for others.

I also have to balance the fact that I still cannot pay anyone anything. I eventually want to take this project to a house, where peeps can literally do what I did ... sign their permission slip to be unapologetically awesome, have access to a car for meetings, have food, water, minimal clothing ... and just see what people do with it. I have incredible faith that if the casting can be just right, this will be a bitchin experiment. See, if people's basic essentials are just covered I think magic can happen. Of course basic essentials are different to everyone. I'm a minimalist in the very extreme sense. I'm not expecting necessarily others to do the same ... but get pretty close.

Either way, that is neither here nor there, focus Jen focus ... This is going to have to be done in stages. I know only what I know because I've done it, and I've had some totally bitchin corporate sponsors to help with equipment. I don't have equipment for everyone just yet, but I am confident in the near future that will change. People are inspired by action. I just have to start this thing already!!!

Stage 1 Requirements:

- 1 Randombling a day. It's a 5 minute unedited random stream of consciousness. Give me the word fuck written over and over for 5 minutes if you have to. I get it, shit happens ... but getting you in the habit of writing will break through a lot of barriers. I don't want journalists, I want you to write these things like you're talking to either your diary, or your best friend. Keep it INCREDIBLY personal, and true to your own voice. I don't expect everyone to have "dude, gnarly, bitchin, and radical" in their vocab. You be you, I'll be me. Let's be awesome!

- FourSquare account. It keeps you very present and makes you more conscious of your surroundings, and DEFINITELY enables some rad story telling. For example, you check in at the LA County Jail ... dude, I KNOW I'm going to want to read your post later.

- Public Twitter. Who has a private twitter anyway? So weird ...

That's going to be it for stage 1. I'm going to come up with some posts on training lifecasters, and even create interview questions for you guys to introduce yourself to everyone before coming on board. You HAVVEEEEEEEE to be honest in lifecasting. We want the good, the bad, and the ugly - all in real time.

For stage 2, I want to incorporate livestreaming, FlipCams and or video editing. That is eventually where I want all of this to lead, as I know it worked on LiveVideo. BUTTT!! I'll take what I can get to just get this bad boy launched and get some feedback from peeps.

Super stoked man! I have reached out to the people I want on board, and oddly enough - it is going to be all females. 4 very nerdy females from 4 very different walks of life. I'm very curious to see how this is going to go.

Going to send out emails officially inviting the chicas now, and hopefully we'll have this up and running in about a week or so. Pretty stoked man!! Again, we're also working on a website redesign to be able to manage all of the posts, so we'll be shifting from a single news feed. So don't worry, all the other featured content and writers that you enjoy will also be here. Just adding some moreeee flaavvaaaaaa!!! Yum Yum Gimme SOMEEEE!!! 

#nerdsunite INDEEEDDD!!!

#TNTML Update! We'ze Beez Changin!

Woahh!! The TNTML family chat on Facebook is like poppin off right now! We're throwing out some ideas for where we want TNTML to head. The mission statement on the About Us page, pretty much calls it out - I want lifecasters. I don't want to be your queen nerd, although flattered - I am just Jen ... and this is the nerdy shit that I do. HAHA!! I dig it, it also takes a LOT less stress off. You're just being! And it's AWESOME! Unapologetically of course ... hehehe

@BBWerner is a super bitchin web designer, and he's going to send me a mock up tonight ... but basically, we're going to start off with about 5 lifecasters (and thank YOU btw for all the emails ... holy crap, there is such a demand ... I'll figure out casting. But first priority is going to current staff.). I feel like any more than 5 can be a bit too impersonal, and any less you might not be able to find someone you can relate to. 5 just feels like a good number to me, but as anyone who has ever been on the casting side of the table knows, you don't really know what you're going to end up with. SOOO!!! Yeah!!!

We're going to transition from the single feed type site, and go into a bit more of a structured beast. Have a section for nerdy news, and features for like the Unkie Chuck Norris, Weird Al says WTF, all that fun stuff that you guys come here for. 

I'm pretty stoked. We've needed this for a while, but I'm just spread so thin ... I can't take on tasks like that and still pump out the content and manage all of the backend. Again, it's bittersweet - we're too big to be so small and too small to be too big. We've got a pretty happenin niche, but man oh man ... if it weren't for you guys, I don't know what I'd do. 

I'm super stoked!! @TaoBliss is helping with all the retagging to get our foundation back up! And I can't WAIT to see what @BBwerner has in store for us. Dude, he did all of our logos. This guy is SERIOUSLY talented!! 

Either way I'm pretty stoked, it's clearly not going to happen overnight ... but over the next couple of weeks or so, there will be more lifecasting from an array of interesting nerdy peeps, which is just a TOTAL dream come true for me. 

Stay tunnneedddddd!!! =) =) =) 

#NerdsUnite