#Randombling: That Nerdy Chick

Randombling: A 5 minute long unedited random stream of consciousness produced by a nerd for nerds.

#nowplaying: Timbaland & Katy Perry - If we ever meet again

A hoi hoi nerderinoooosssssss ... what's kickin' chicken?

Holy fuckerdy, yesterday could not have gone better. Like could not, at all ... under any circumstances ... have gone better.

I had 4 meetings, 1 with a lit agent - who is now my lit agent and is lighting a fire under my bum to write a book that I cannot yet discuss ... one was with MTV, Discovery, and finally this studio chickadee. So unbelievably rad hearing from all of them who represent a different part of the spectrum that there were stories under this brand that were applicable to their networks. People really really really want to talk nerdy - and I have to say, it couldn't be more humbling.

Generals are interesting things. You basically go into a room, in this case with the VP of talent from both networks, and you say hi - my name is Jen Friel, the technical term for what I do is lifecasting but I'm also a personal brand, and this is my story. It's a pretty cool experience, and honestly so much has gone down - with each network you highlight more of what would make sense to them. Ex: for MTV, I talked more about crashing the grammys, flying cross country with Billy Gibbons, and dancing on stage with prince. With Discovery you talk about living out of your car, traveling around - etc etc.

And yes, I wore my vans to meet with the fancy pants!!! It's really cool man, but just jolted me that here I am entering the TV industry and I know NOTHING about it. I'm a team builder. That's my thang! When I don't know something, I pull out my deck of cards (aka my network) and find someone who can assist and offer them something as well so we can build together. It's a give and take for sure. I'm in this position now as a new media peep that I get where a lot of this COULD go, and SHOULD go, but I don't know where it already is, and what already makes sense, and could potentially be improved. Like I've said before, I am UNBELIEVABLY fascinated by being able to tell stories in real time, and organically through social media - I know there is a way to take that to TV too, I'm just kinda putzin around with it and throwing around ideas. No matter what though, you need a big dog to back you up and someone you can go to with questions on standard operating procedures and politics.

It's nuts, but I have nothing to lose - and people really really really dig the whole mission behind this site, so I know the right card will come, I just have to center myself and figure it all out.

AHHH!! So insane!! Like best. day. ever. yesterday!!!

It's nuts too, I have more meetings today, followed by more when I get back to LA on Monday. ANNNNDDD I have to come back to Boston and NY in a few weeks. Yep, you read that right - back. to. Boston.

UUGGHHH!!! The press peeps for the show I'm doing contacted me and they want me on the local news and what not, so I have to go back. Plus, they didn't really jive well with my whole - but I shot B roll!!! I can just use that for the exterior shots and shoot the interior in LA. Ummmmmmm yeah. Shot down.

FML.

I dunno, a few weeks away is too far ahead for me to think - present moment magic time, and my plate is FULL!!!!! Goodness gracious.

So so so unbelievably stoked, thank you SO much to this community for everything you guys have done. It MAJORLY impressed the suits yesterday, and it's going to do so so so much for this brand - you guys made my dream come true, thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you. thank you.

DC TOMORROW!!!! Followed by LA ON SUNDAY!!!! HOME!!!! HOME!!!! HOME!!!!!!!! ::nerdy happy dance::

#peaceloveandlollipops

#Randombling: That Nerdy Chick

Randombling: A 5 minute long unedited random stream of consciousness produced by a nerd for nerds.

#nowplaying: Bullet and Snowfox - Supergirl

AAHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I am SOOOO friggen like excited, and all around grateful to be alive, man. Like for reals!!! So much is going on right now, it's just warming my SOULLL!!!! 

First up, my parentals are coming to Boston to visit tomorrow. Super fucking stoked - I only get to see them like once a year, so I'm kind of excited. ANNNNDD it's cool because it finally clicked when I ended up on TV that my parents get that this whole thing is kinda a big deal. They don't get the internet ... at all. I mean, they both use it, and my dad is an UBER tech geek - but they don't get social media, and they don't get what running this site really means. It's not just something I choose to do one day - this is my life, and my passion - I was born to do this. Like literally. I am on this planet to do everything that I am doing right this moment. 

So, they're getting it now, which excites me. We're going out to a super fancy pants dinner tomorrow to celebrate and I couldn't be happier. YAY MOM AND DAD TIME!!!!!! I don't care how old you are, trust, you still need a mom and dad hug periodically. 

I'm just finishing editing on season 2 for Vidblogger Nation. Pretty stoked - I only have 2 more days of filming for season 3. Good god I am never ever doing 2 seasons in just a couple of weeks again. It wouldn't be as bad if I hired an editor but ugghhhhhhh, I'd rather save. Yeah, that's the cool and shitty thing about this - I'm not only talent but producer, so keeping costs down puts more $$ in my pocket. And I'm not greedy by any stretch of the imagination - but I do enjoy no longer eating ramen and spaghetti. $3.50 sushi from Trader Joes it is!! WHOOP WHOOP!!! <tangent> HOLY FUCCKKKKKKK their wasabi is literally the hottest thing I have ever had. I've cried MULTIPLE times because of it. It just shoots RIIGGHHHTTT up your sinuses. OMG OMG OMG PPAAIINNNNN!!!! And awesome ... but mostly PAAIIINNNN!!! </tangent> 

I'm just excited to be alive and in this present moment. No other way to say it!! On Monday I head to NYC for the week, followed by Friday - Sunday in DC and then back to LA. OMMMMMGGGGGGGG 9 more days til I sleep in my OWN bed again after being gone for THIRTY DAYSS on the road!!!! What a long adventure this has been, but so so so worth it. 

I'm totes playing catch up on my inbox, so I apologize if I missed out on anyone's emails. I'm taking a personal day tomorrow with family and old friends - but Sunday night I'll arrange a meet up or something if anyone else still wants to grab a beer while I'm in the area. My apologies for editing to take longer than anticipated (so what else is new) but I am here for this show, so it has to come first. GOOOSSHHHHHHHHH!!! You'd think they were like paying me, or something. 

I am humbled from my soul, nerderinos. Please please please do yourself a favor and follow your heart and follow your bliss. We're only 22 months old and the first line of my book will be ... "one day, I started this website."

Love. Love. Love. You all. Thank you for reading, thank you for the support, and thank you for talking nerdy to me!!! =) =) =)  

#namaste

PS. Kristen Wagner you are a ROCKSTAR and I am OBSESSED with Bullet & Snowfoxxxxxx!!!! 

#Randombling: That Nerdy Chick

Randombling: A 5 minute long unedited random stream of consciousness produced by a nerd for nerds.

#nowplaying: Rihanna & Eminem - Love the way you lie (pt 2)

I need to vent. A lot.

I just had a friend ask me for a favor on Facebook, and he had the opportunity himself a week ago - and he didn't friggen show up!!! I was like dude, come hang out - whatevs. Nada!!! Didn't hear from him, didn't ... anything.

THEENNNNNN, flash forward a few days and he wants me to call in a favor with said friend that he could have met himself?? Are you fucking kidding me??!?!

Lemme just make something UNBELIEVABLY clear - relationships don't just "happen," they are cultivated. I show up every. single. day. for life, and every. single. meeting. with whoever to either learn something, help someone out - whatevs!! NOTHING GETS HANDED TO YOU!!!! The level of arrogance that this tech start up is just so magical that of COURSE this person would want to hear about it ... I am disgusted. Get over yourself. For reals. Or at least DO have that great of an idea and pray to god you can just cash out early, haha. I dunno. whatevs.

But for real, that is THE biggest button that I can't handle people pushing. Do NOT use me for connections when you had the opportunity to meet said connection and failed to for one reason or another.

Get off your ass, work really hard, and keep your head down so you can learn. Period end of sentence.

BAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! I've known the kid for years, I'll always love him - but what a fucking idiot professionally speaking. Opportunity gets handed to you on a platter and you say you're not hungry?!?!?! ::stupidity leak:: It's business, man. I might adore you as a person - but I have ZERO tolerance for stupidity professionally speaking.

K, I feel better. Had breakfast/ lunch with this duderino with a start up this morning. He found me on OKC when I put out the broadcast the other night (and we all know how that went).

Had a great burrito, he and I were talking about his start up and I inquired about his experience with online dating - pretty rad. Then, as I was leaving I was looking for a coffee shop to work out of - didn't like the one closest by ... walked out, then realized after all that ice tea I had to use the restroom ... went back into the restaurant to use the bathroom and as I am walking out I bumped into the sister of one of my oldest friends in LA.

Actually, remember the CAA story?? And how I had dinner with one of the agents there through my dad's college roommate? Same circle. The cousin is this chickadee Noelle, and Noelle's best friend was Amanda - and this is Amanda's sister Rachel, who lived with her at the time. And now oddly enough, I live a block away from their old apartment. OMG my head hurts - but yeah - I was LITERALLY walking out, she was holding the door and I go OMG OMG OMG!!! She then stares at me equally shocked but trying to place.

RACHELLLLLLL!!! I say with a hug, it's Jen Friel!!

HOLY CRAP she said!!!

We caught up for a minute, exchanged numbers, and now I'm grabbing beers with one of my oldest LA friends that I haven't talked to in like 5 years after bumping into her outside a restroom in Cambridge, MA. Like seriously?? Is this happening right now???

INSANE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Alrite, gotta find a mouse since my mighty mouse decided to RIP. Need to finish editing yesterday's footage, then revamp a storyline so I can film this radio station thingie tonight. I'm actually pretty stoked - I'm going to be on a boat!! YAYYY!!! BOATS!!!!!!

Good shit nerderinos. Good shit! Peace love and lollipops!

#nerdsunite

PS. This picture totally just made me cry. Like hardcore ... like now I need to find a restroom because there is mascara streaming down my face. Thanks, dog.

#Randombling: That Nerdy Chick

Randombling: A 5 minute long unedited random stream of consciousness produced by a nerd for nerds.

#nowplaying: Telepopmusik- Breathe

I may or may not be doing the robot in the kitchen ... talk amongst yourselves.AHHHH duderinos - I am so. freaking. EXCITED!!! I just finished my season 2 episode outline for the show I'm filming in Boston, and omg omg omg the adventures are going to be EPIC!!! I'm STILL not allowed to say the name of what I'm doing, or peeps involved (theyre announcing around September 5th) - BUUUTTTTT I can obviously post in real time where I am and what's going on. It's a pretty cool project, and while season 1 may have been a COMPLETE clusterfuck, I learned a lot and I'm ready to kick it back in the field and get some shit done.

BAH! Currently just going over finances for the month. I can't BELIEVE I am going to be gone from LA for exactly 30 days - that is just ... bat shit. LA is my home, always has been - always will be. Dudes, even before I moved here - I knew growing up and watching Saved By the Bell as a kid, that this was the place for me. It sounds weird, but I've never ever had a problem knowing what I wanted from life - I was just glad 7 years later it's all still working out.

Super stoked for this week in general. Not only do I head to Chicago on Friday night, but on Thursday I have a big meeting with the investor duderino and the advisor. Basically they are going to break everything down into doable actions on the process for getting seed money - and ::fingers crossed:: everyone is on board. When everything shakes out I am going to end up having to give up 1/3 of the brand in general - but I'm totes kosher with it since I own 100% of it now, and holy fuck I am running myself into the ground. HAHA you can own 100% of nothing since you end up burning out - or you can be super smart by building a solid team around you that can take it to another level. Yes, it sucks having to give up some of the brand - but I recognize this is the next step, you just have to go with it.

Plus too, all these people are SUPERLY DUPERLY smart, and SUPERLY DUPERLY accomplished - totally an honor to even have them CONSIDER working with me. Very. Very. Very. humbling.

I'm just trying to stay grounded in this entire process; I think that's where being a loaner totally comes in handy - I very frankly don't give a fuck. I don't seek other's approval, I don't need anything from anyone - I very literally own my awesome. Every day that goes by, and after reading all of your comments, tweets, and emails - I get really inspired for where we can all grow as a community, and how we can do even MORE cool shit and get more of you involved.

To say I am excited is an understatement - this is all a dream come true. I'm still shocked that following your own heart, and your own gut could lead down to a path like this. It was all just a series of bread crumbs, and some of the biggest decisions that I ever made, seemed like nothing at the time - they just "felt" right.

Before this entire story becomes a massively huge cliche (even though I already feel like it is one), please please please please please follow your dreams, nerds. Don't EVER sacrifice a minute of your happiness, or compromise a minute of your sanity for anything else. Breathe, follow your heart, and remember in 100 years we'll all be dead anyway. Take risks, laugh hard - remember, we don't get out of this trip alive.

All my love and all my heart. Keep on keepin' on!!!

#love

oh and PS ... 

#Randombling: That Nerdy Chick

Randombling: A 5 minute long unedited random stream of consciousness produced by a nerd for nerds.

#nowplaying: Sophie B. Hawkins - As I Lay Me Down To Sleep

UGHHHH!!! What an uncomfortable evening. First off, I just sent a Dear John Facebook email to Coldplay Cutie. That was super hard, I actually really liked the dude - I'm going to finish writing the post out tomorrow. It breaks my heart, man because he's such a great guy. He just violated a couple of rules that I have from a personal boundaries perspective, and it was totally a deal breaker. Sad, but true. Still a great guy, but just gonna keep on truckin doin my own thing. Sucks major ball sack.

I've been thinking about Romeo all week. Seeing him again was totally one of the most overwhelming things I've experienced in recent memory. It made me sad ... so fucking sad. He's great, and amazing - very literally has never looked better ... but just makes me sad because he's not even the one that got away, he's the one that never even got a chance. I loved Romeo on and off for 2 years (he was my first love), then when he moved away, I moved on ... we circled back together about a year later, then when I fell out of love with him, he finally fell in love with me. Then I moved to Florida for a few months, and RIIIGGHHHTTT when I met the mentalist and fell head over heels, Romeo was fishing to see if I would move in with him when I came back to LA. We were always super fucking close, and he was just "that guy" to me. He was my dude, the one that I could always call no matter what crazy neurotic thing I was experiencing. He would tell me I was crazy and neurotic and somehow I would feel better and just move on.

I've spent the last 4 days crying. Had I not started talking to the mentalist, I KNOW I would have moved in with him and who knows where we would be over 2 years later.

It's the single biggest regret of my life. Hands down.

I've never been so aware of one person having such an impact on a series of recent decisions. I get SO ANGRY at the mentalist still to this day. Albeit, who knows if I would have this site (because it was the energy from us being together that brought all this about) - I know you never know, but it makes me sad to think I lost out on someone so amazing to fall for someone so fucking douchey.

::slaps forehead:: How could I be so smart intellectually speaking and so fucking dumb when it comes to some of the most important decisions of my life.

I am proud to say that I have cried a little less each day. Wednesday night I cried myself uncontrollably to sleep, followed by only a couple hours of tears on Friday, to now for just a few minutes on Sunday.

We haven't talked since Wednesday and I doubt that we ever will again. He's in a serious relationship, I get it - and again, he looks so fucking amazing  ... he needs to keep it up! But it's still hard for me. It feels like this loss and void.

OMMMMMMGGGGGGGGG I am crying again.

Such a fucking chick, man.

The hurt will go away soon, time heals everything. At least I hope so.

Savor every moment nerderinos, and shower the people you love with love, hold 'em tight - and never let 'em go.

#HeartPleaseStopHurting

ps. i still read the facebook email he sent me. i read it over ... and over ... and over ... fml

click here to read the full story on Romeo