Unkie Chuck Norris Says ...

A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous.

Oh yeah and the Drummer for Def Leppard’s only got one arm. Chuck Norris needed a back scratcher.

Unkie Chuck Norris Says ...

So often times it happens that we live our lives in chains and we never even know we have the key.

Oh yeah and Chuck Norris doesn’t say ‘who’s your daddy’, because he knows the answer.

Unkie Chuck Norris Says ...

Growth is the willingness to let reality be new every moment.

Oh yeah and in the first Jurassic Park movie, the Tyrannosaurus Rex wasn’t chasing the jeep. Chuck Norris was chasing the Tyrannosaurus AND the jeep.

Unkie Chuck Norris Says ...

Borrowing knowledge of reality from all sources, taking the best from every study, Science of Mind brings together the highest enlightenment of the ages. 

Oh yeah and Chuck Norris eats beef jerky and craps gunpowder. Then, he uses that gunpowder to make a bullet, which he uses to kill a cow and make more beef jerky. Some people refer to this as the ‘Circle of Life.’

Unkie Chuck Norris Says ...

We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have.

Oh yeah and Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can’t get up the courage to tell him.