<editorsnote>Hi, I'm Jen Friel, and we here at TNTML examine the lives of nerds outside of the basements and into the social media, and dating world. We have over 75 peeps that write about their life in real time. (Real nerds, real time, real deal.) Sit back, relax, and enjoy some of the stories!!</editorsnote>
Editor's Note: Shina Rae is a newbie to the LA dating scene. No like for reals, she's only been here for like a month. Supah dupah new! Here's her latest problemo ...
#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @ShinaRae
I have a dilemma..... I have a guy friend who I've known for quite some time and only recently have I realized I actually kinda like this guy - let's call him Mike. He's chill, he's a gentleman, he makes me laugh. He treats me better than the guy who just broke my heart. Mike wants to take me out, and see me when he's in town. That's right he doesn't live here, but he's here quite often for work.
*there I go again finding someone who's not totally available to me, what's wrong with us Jen??
So Mike, he made a move once, but I totally shot him down. You see I was engaged in an evil game of quantum entanglement with the aforementioned heart-breaker. I'm like most girls when I'm interested in someone; blinders on, full speed ahead.... So yeah, totes shot him down when he leaned in for a kiss, and ever since then..... FRIEND ZONE!!!
Bumms for him, right??? But we're actually great friends now, so imagine my surprise when all the sudden I'm getting those little tingles of excitement at thoughts of him. And I'm disappointed when he's here and I don't get to see him.... I turned off the blinders and I see what a rad guy Mike is, and I'm either really really REALLY a horn dog right now, or I like him.... like, like like him. I've been thinking for a minute now, I might be down to take it to the next level.
Enter problem #2 - I want him to make the move. Not the move to LA, although that would be helpful, but just the first move....again. I've put out signals, I know I have. I'm not that touchy with guys, I don't tell them how much I enjoy their company, I don't give extra long full body hugs..... and I'm doing all of this and more. But I am not going to make the move tho. (Is this a sign I don't want him enough? I dunno.) I just want the man to be the man and to make an effort to get me. But waiting for him to make the move is soooooo effing frustrating. I mean, he may think I'm just being friendly with all the flirting, I did shoot him down before. He may not be up for that a second time, and there fore may not even consider making a move again for fear of the same results. And would they be?? Seq-way into problem 3. What if he's a bad kisser?? Or worse, what if he's not enough for me (you know what I mean *wink wink*) ie. a bad lover?? Then he'd be right back in the Zone, except it could be weird then, and I really like our friendship, and definitely don't want to fuck that one up.
GAWD this is madness!!! I like like him, I do, but I don't want to make the official move, he doesn't even live in the same city, and there's lots more of those reasonings to muse over. But above all, I don't want to lose our friendship because it's actually pretty awesome. I just can't help thinking about him, and wondering..... Should I take him out of the Friend Zone??
Well I'm not going to make the move, so I guess I won't, at least not yet. I'll just lay my cards out in a public blog, so he maybe can see them and extrapolate that I'm talking about him and perhaps the next time he's in town, take the hint. Really good plan, Shina!
I could really use some opinions on this one here, like I said it is a major dilemma..... and I'm actually too scared to ask the 8 ball about this one, so I want real people thoughts. Got any??
Editor's note: I have very literally spent all morning crying while writing this post. Seriously ... this weekend was amazing and overwhelming on a lot of levels. A lot of unexpected healing occurred ... a whole. whole. lot.
Oh lordy schmick-mordy. What a weekend ... lemme break it all down, cause straight up, down, left, and right - it was the tits. DDs for reals!!!!
So, Saturday, I had one of the best nights of my life. Here's a song, btw.
K. So I was asked to be a Wing Girl on Saturday for Neil Strauss' StyleLife event. Basically he teamed up with Marni from The Wing Girl Method, to take his students from the academy and unleash them on downtown LA to learn how to pick up women in the field. Totally rad, and after 103 dates in 9 months on OKC, I had a LOT of insight to offer.
I'm not gonna lie, when I first heard though it was a Neil Strauss event (aka the dude that wrote every woman's worst nightmare The Game), I was a bit turned off ... but also a bit curious. I knew in my heart if I could just put on my big girl pants, and not take the fact that I fell for The Game when I dated the mentalist (read an exerpt here), I could take something away from this and hopefully gain some personal insight, and potentially even understand you all better and what makes you nervous about approaching women at bars.
Bottom line: I went in with a very. very. very. open mind.
Trust me, I didn't want to. It's not exactly a normal thing to want to invest your entire Saturday with the guy who created the formula for the dude that broke your heart; it's fucked up, but I recognized if I could tolerate that place of uncomfort, something amazing could come from it.
I got to the event pretty early, it was an all day conference which for me is just ... my worst nightmare. I'm super fucking ADD. I can't sit in a room and stare at a person talk at me for 8 hours without falling asleep. I kept having to get up and use the restroom just so I could walk around, and I was also super grateful that I had my iPad that I connected to wifi on thanks to my super pancy pants Droid Charge (mobile hot spot for up to 10 devices).
I'm not allowed to say what exactly happened at the conference, or how he does what he does - we had to sign an NDA ... but there were a few things that I wanted to highlight on an all encompassing social dynamic level.
First off, give specific answers to build an identity.
When someone asks you, soooo what kinda music do you like? Don't ever answer with "everything." That's what everyone says, and isn't very interesting. We all like everything ... so what! Give a specific answer of oh, I like Bob Marley and here's why. That person isn't looking to borrow your iPod for the weekend, they are looking to get to know you, so give them something to unlock.
Secondly, I say to you guys all the time that I am attracted to confidence, but I haven't really broken that down for you. What the fuck is confidence?
In the simplest of terms, confidence is the byproduct of you understanding your self worth and articulating that to someone. It's that you've gone on a little journey to figure out what you enjoy, and are good at - and BAM! That be it!
It sounds really easy, but of course it's not. Self worth creates self esteem from the inside out. You have to turn inside of yourself and say, yep! I like doing this ... and if it feels good ... keep going!!! You're on the right track! There's no science to this, you just have to be constantly self evaluating and be willing to make changes when you feel something isn't working. Period. End of sentence.
So yeah, that was definitely an a-ha moment for me in explaining to you all what that really means. I am making a commitment to no longer say I am attracted to confident guys, and rather I am attracted to guys with an established sense of self worth.
Me likes the sound of that!!!
So then I swapped out my vans for my sexy sexy boots and we got separated into groups where each wing girl was given about 5 dudes to take to bars in downtown Los Angeles. I was one of the lucky ones that didn't have to go far ... I was assigned to the rooftop bar at the Standard.
OMMGGGGG that place is BEAAUUTTIIFFULLLLL!!!!!
This picture doesn't even do it justice, clearly. I mean wow. wow. wow. I had never been, but I was truly in awe.
K ... so I got my group, and I got my assignment, but the first thing we all had to do was bond. We were instructed to warm the guys up by doing simple improv games to get them up and on their feet. After a few rounds - the guys were still nervous. I needed to build trust and an emotional connection if I knew they were going to listen to me, and take risks, I had to just cut out the bullshit and get to the heart of it. I pulled out an OKC question, and asked everyone to go around in the group and say the most private thing they are willing to admit.
I started to get things off on the right foot ... and shit got real fast, and pretty intense. Everyone went around and said something very very very private, and BAM! Just like that, they all realized that they had ALL gone through some shit, and it all became this factor of so what! Shit happens, move on!
I then mimed this little door and said all that stays right here along with all the self deprecation. (The dudes made cracks a few times about being losers and all that snazzy jazzy stuff. I fucking called 'em out on it, man! I said I do NOT want to hear that coming out of your mouth. You're actively seeking to make yourself better at something. How does that make you a loser??? Are you KIDDING!??! Yeah, joking or not, and as we all know when you joke about things like that, there really is something in you that reflects that ... either way, I do NOT tolerate that shit.)
The guys were pumped at that point. I made them do one of those Saved by the Bell 1990 style group jump high 5s and awayyyyyyyyyy we went upstairs to the bar.
I broke it all down for the guys. I said at first, I don't want you thinking about opening any "sets" as Neil calls it - I just want you to go up to 3 people, male or female, and offer them a compliment then walk away. I wanted to get them comfortable even talking to people before even thinking about approaching women.
Dudes, all I have to say is that these guys ROCCKKKKKEEEEEEEDDDDD ITTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!
Once I gave them a little nudge, BOOOOMMMMMM!!!! They were good. I had to catch them a few times and say okay, you've been here for too long - go circulate. Every guy was different. But fortunately because I, myself, am so fucking socially awkward (particularly at bars) I was able to spot in 2 seconds their BS and say - NOPE! Go here! Do this!!! They were like, I can't! I said, can't is not an option. We're going to break this down for you into doable actions. First, you are going to take 20 steps. Second, you are going to sit down on the corner of that couch. Third, you are going to open your mouth say that you have to get back to your friend over there (cue the wave to me), but you had this question you needed an opinion on. Fourth, you are going to thank them, smile, and walk back to me.
Dudes, I got these guys who had expressed SUCH tremendous fear of dancing groovin on the dance floor to OPP with me!!! HAHAHA, I was bustin a move and shakin my polaroid picture like it was mah JOOOOBBBBBBBBBBBB!!!!
All of the guys kept thanking me for pushing them, and two even said this was the greatest night of their life. I said yeah man, welcome to life!!! It's pretty fucking awesome right?!?!
I kept explaining to them that their awesome was organic and that their only job in life was to let it shine! I said, we already left all of that baggage and self deprecating shit at the door - now it's your time to shine baby!!
OMG OMG OMG and shine they did. One dude in particular just OWNNNEEEDDD the place!!! He was so afraid even approaching women assuming they instantly were thinking something negative about him, but MAN he improved the most. I kept saying to him, you're fucking glowing man! Go! Stop talking to me! This glow is contagious - go spread it!!!!
Something clicked in me Saturday night. I found a calling when I created this website clearly ... but I really really really found a calling in helping these dudes. I am an AWESOME wing girl, and it was great for me too because there I was all hottie patottie at a bar, sipping on water with a lime, and I was approached by SOOOOOOOO many dudes!!!
SERIOUSLY!!!!
I stopped thinking and being so neurotic and just had a BLAST, and BAMMMMMMMMMMMMM haha it was partially overwhelming. I was like wow, I forgot how it felt to feel hot again. These dudes too made me feel like such a pretty pretty princess. They were so complimentary from a truthful organic place, and were so vulnerable with the questions they asked - totally life changing, and totally changed my view on men in general. I had NOOOOOOOOOO idea you all thought about this shit too, and it's TOTALLLYYYYYYY going to change my approach in my current social experiment.
In FACT, I may even go out tonight to prove that ... omg omg omg I am getting so jazzed even reliving that night writing this post.
I over think everything. That is my personality - I'm a connector, and I'm a mechanic. I enjoy connecting people (hence our official hashtag #nerdsunite), and I enjoy breaking situations down to figure out how they work, and how they can be more efficient. I can't do that when it comes to dudes. I can't sit there at a bar and analyze a dudes personality and think okay, this is how he is with this ... this is how I am with that ... you have to just let this shit happen, man. But you can't say that to someone like me, because I'll sit there and go, bahhhhhhhhhhh you don't know what you're talking about. No, I need to take a dose of my own medicine and re-evaluate because clearly what I am doing is not the most efficient manner.
Lesson learned.
These guys taught me so much. So. So. So. Much. The growth in them socially was HUUGGEEEE and I was such a proud mama and felt so emotionally invested in these dudes. When all was said and done, I just could not have been happier.
We are ALL neurotic, self conscious, and whackadoodle noodles. SO WHATTTT!!!! That is a CONSTANT!!! That is the human condition!!!! MOVE ON!!! We are all SUCH insular beings, that it just doesn't fucking matter. No one is sitting there in judgement of you because they are prolly too concerned with all the shit going on in their own noggin. SO WHAT ELSE IS STOPPING YOU FROM LIVING THE LIFE YOU WANT TO LEAD!?!?!?! Go up to these women!!! We're sitting there EQUALLY neurotic questioning why the fuck no one is approaching.
UGHHHHHHHHH!!! AMAZEBALLS ON AN ENTIRELY NEW LEVEL!!!
Dudes, look at the email I got the next morning from one of the guys not even in my group - but someone who saw what I was doing with the group ...
Way to make my life.
K ... so Saturday was amazing. I learned from Neil that all The Game is, is a tool. If someone chooses to do something negatively with it - awesome, so it is, and let them be, but they're the exception not the rule.
It also got me thinking about even the concept of a negative experience. So yeah, I had my heart broken - but so what. I can't ever be "right" in this situation no matter how HAARRRDDD I want to be. It's not going to happen, and closure is a joke. I then thought about it like this ... so you get burned by the stove as a kid. You didn't sit there and say, fuck you stove! How dare you do this to me!!! I'm going to get you?!?!?!!?!?!
Well, maybe some kids do. But I got burned as a kid, and then I learned - OUCH! That was hot. Totally not gonna do that again, and I moved on.
Obviously there are emotional connections when it comes to love that cannot clearly be so cut and dry, but I dunno - maybe they can. It is only my ego that wants to be right in this situation, but no matter what, there never is a winner. So why am I beating myself up over it? I got burned. The flame wasn't wrong, the flame was just being the flame. I, however, can make a conscious decision to say, okay, what in me wants to put my hand on the stove. What in me, wants to feel that pain. THAT is something that needs to be addressed not trying to say to the flame, cool down motha fucka! Not gonna happen. At all.
Life is bat shit, man. UGH! But I just keep wanting more.
So then on Sunday, I got invited to a Summit Series brunch.
Holy hell batman. Talk about one of the most overwhelming in every awesome way experiences of my life. I energetically felt "home" for lack of a better word. I now truly understand what people say when they tell me I am a very "intense" person ... dudes, I was at a party with 100 equally "intense" people.
I honestly don't want to talk a lot about what I experienced there as it was something that was very special to me - but I can say that meeting that many intense people in that short of a span of time almost totally knocked me on my ass. I'm just not used to that ... at ALL. There is not a SHADOW of a doubt that these people are going to change the world ... and WOW how fucking overwhelming that my energy is currently aligned with them. So. So. So. Humbling. They're total rockstars.
HAHHAHA it was funny though, I am only social in settings because it was a survival skill I learned as a kid. I am organically pretty introverted. I enjoy talking to people, but I get weird after a little bit and my ADD kicks in and just wants to explore how blue the sky is. I can't help that part about myself ... but it just got INSANE meeting THAT many intense people, vibing with their energy, and then going oh holy fuck, your name is what? Wait did I ask what you do? OMG - overload.
It was intense, insane, and amazing all in the same breath. I am very very very grateful for communities like the Summit Series to even be in existence. They're all such connectors too ... wow. wow. wow. Great things coming soon world. Holy moly ravioli.
So yeah, that was my weekend. Very intense to say the least, but I couldn't have been more grateful.
It trips me out that life is not at ALL what I thought it was. Reality really is perceived, so if you're in a negative state in any capacity ... and I REALLY mean this ... no. matter. what. - you are doing life wrong. You owe it to yourself to find your awesome and let it shine, because holy hell batman, the experiences that are derived from that will blow your socks off.
Literally!!!!!!!
All my love and all my heart TNTML! Such an eye opening weekend.
PS. For reals, if you were at the conference this weekend I wanna talk to you!! I am TOTALLY invested emotionally in your story now ... and I wanna keep in touch!! SERIOUSLY!!!
Email me ... JenFriel at TalkNerdyToMeLover dot com
Hunt me down in a grocery store ... I don't care. You guys made something click inside of me, and that is something I am going to hold onto forever. So please please please reach out, you never bother me. And I totes wanna be invited to the weddings, btw!!! =) =) =) xoxoxoxxoxxoxo
Many women like the idea of a man who is confident enough just to say, hopefully AFTER you’ve had sex a few times first so that it’s not completely weird, “I want to understand your sexuality better; tell me what kinds of things turn you on and how I can be a better lover for you.”
Just saying something like that displays great confidence and an unselfish desire to please her that no woman is going to be anything less than thrilled about.
It’s the kind of thing she will tell her friends and they will say, “Wow! I wish MY boyfriend was cool like that!”
And yet…
It’s also something that, whether consciously or on an unconscious level, the majority of women are going to find frustrating and disappointing.
She may say something like, “I don’t know… I just like what you are doing.”
Or she may give you a good answer about something that she likes…
But part of her will feel robbed of the magic of spontaneity… and, on a more subtle, but possibly even more powerful level, she will feel the loss of some of the sexual tension between you… the loss of some of your masculine power over her.
In many aspects of relationships, women like to be your equal. In some areas, particularly those that are considered part of the feminine domain like decorating the home, she will want to be the boss… but in the area of sexuality in particular, MOST women will favor more traditional sex roles.
They will prefer a man who confidently leads.
Of course, that opens a problem: What if the things you are doing are not the things she likes? What if you are disappointing her by not asking her what she likes because she wants something totally different in a lover than what you are naturally giving her?
I have said many times that a woman loves a man who already knows what he’s doing and LEADS her there with a firm but gentle hand.
But I’ve also said many times that all women are different and what works on one will definitely not work on all… Am I contradicting myself?
Probably.
But love-making is an endlessly complex (and endlessly interesting) topic, and it is filled with contradiction and counter-intuitive ideas.
Like I said in the beginning, if she doesn’t mind being asked what turns her on, (or even appreciates it) there is nothing wrong with it. Every woman is different, after all.
But there is a “next level” to this, and if you are open-minded enough to ask her what she likes, then you will be open to this as well.
If a woman likes that you care enough to ask her… might she like it even MORE if you already know what she likes… or, better, if you know ways to give her more sexual pleasure than she was aware even existed?
See, the final problem with asking a woman what she likes in bed, is that, authentically, she probably doesn’t know all the things that will rock her world yet… because she hasn’t been with a man yet who did them to her.
That’s the next level: teaching her things about her body that she never even knew about. Giving her more pleasure than she knew she was capable of, because she had never experienced that level of pleasure with any previous lover.
Nobody skis down the expert slope the first time they get on a mountain, nobody golfs under par the first time they pick up a club, nobody bowls a 300 the first time they pick up a ball, and… well… you get the idea.
It sounds reasonable to believe that nobody knows her body and what turns her on better than SHE herself does…
But it’s wrong.
A young girl masturbating may learn to give herself considerable pleasure, she certainly can learn to orgasm… but there is no way that she is going to discover accidentally the kind of mind-blowing sexual pleasure that a skilled partner can give her.
There are places you can take her that she just can’t get to by herself. A big part of this is the connected feeling that she can build with a loving partner which will allow her to surrender deeper into the experience.
But once she’s surrendered, it’s up to that partner (you) to lead her further or even into something completely new and more powerful.
Let yourself experiment a bit.
Don’t always do the same thing… don’t just experiment with WHAT you do, but with HOW you do it… try different rhythms and intensities. Try tenderness and aggressiveness, holding space and being dominating.
Just see what happens. Pay attention. Tune in to her body and her “energy” with all of your senses. You will find all sorts of things that she doesn’t know about her body yet. (By the way, do this in a place where you aren’t afraid of someone hearing because the possibility exists that when you really hit the right button, she’s going scream like she’s being murdered without realizing it).
If you’ve been in a relationship for a while and she’s gotten used to you either playing a more passive role during sex, or just not being very experimental, then she may offer some resistance at first.
People don’t like change… even when it’s change that is for the better. It doesn’t mean she doesn’t like you. It doesn’t mean she doesn’t respect you… but, look, she might not trust you to bust into the cockpit and take the controls of an airplane you guys are traveling on either…(unless you’ve got a jet-certified commercial pilot’s license).
As you become a more expert lover, she’s just not going to be immediately confident that you know what you’re doing in the driver’s seat of the very powerful feelings that are welling up inside of her. Take your time and build her confidence in your abilities slowly and without judgment. Over time, she will learn to trust that you just might know more about what’s going on than she does… and she will begin, more and more, to surrender to you.
To learn more from The Art of Charm about how to meet & attract women, visit www.afterhello.com And, if you're an LA local, you can stop by The Art of Charm office and meet the crew!
Editor's note: I agre with this post like 100000000000000000 trillion percent. I am a hustler, and I run a brand - but that doesn't mean I want to run the bedroom; I enjoy being submissive sexually - it shuts my brain off. (HAHAHA one of the few things on this planet that does.) A guy has to take control and own it. Don't be afraid, just go for it. I'm vocal and I'll tell you what does and doesn't work ... of course gently as to not ruin the mood. But don't be afraid, man. It's pleasure, never apologize for it. xoxoxxoo
So, you’re dating a woman now whose only sexual experiences have been with men who are pump and dumpers. For those of you who don’t know what a pump and dumper is, it’s what I call ‘minutemen.’
Not the minutemen from the Revolutionary War. They get in, they thrust their hips, they pump a few times, and then they dump all their little men: all their little sea-men to swim all over the place.
A lot of women who are young (and some unfortunately who are older) have only been with pump and dumpers and they have no idea how unbelievably amazing sex can be with an attentive, sexually aware man ... a man who really knows that sex and foreplay start right inside a woman’s mind.
So let’s say you’ve done it all right.
You’ve started with sex and foreplay, and you’ve seduced her mind and you have her all turned on. How do you encourage this woman, who is basically very submissive in bed due to the fact that all of her experience is with Mr. Pump and Dump?
The reason why she is submissive, much of the time, is that she has never explored her own sexuality. A lot of women who have had pump and dumpers don’t know what they want sexually, and they are usually women who have never masturbated. They don’t know what feels good and what doesn’t. Their only experience is with Mr. P & D.
For those of you who think he is related to P & G, you’re absolutely incorrect. Pump and Dump is not Proctor & Gamble – though I heard that Proctor & Gamble makes their products for pump and dumpers. But it’s just a rumor that I heard!
Anyway, how do you encourage this woman to open up to her own sexuality?
First of all, this woman may or may not have ever had an orgasm before. I would assume that she never has.
She thinks she might be having an orgasm – it might be a momentary wave – but she is not having a full-blown orgasm.
If you ask her if she’s had an orgasm, and she says, “I think so” – there is no “I think so” when it comes down to orgasms.
Either you’ve had one or you haven’t! If a woman will tell you that she thinks she had an orgasm, it means that she has probably only experienced a little wave of pleasure and not a full orgasmic experience. Ladies, please chime in here and describe what a full orgasmic experience feels like so all the men know.
So let’s assume that she’s never had an orgasm. You’ve got to become the teacher in this relationship. She is probably the type of woman who just expects you to do whatever you want to do, and she’ll just lie there submissively.
You need to show her slowly how amazing sex is. I would take some extra time and give her a full body massage. I would spend extra time kissing her and just touching her, everywhere except in her breast and her groin area.
I would take extra time when I go down on her and not only lick her, but also to touch all parts of her body at the same time. I would also slip one finger inside as I was licking her in order to give her a different experience.
I wouldn’t ask her if she is coming.
I would just continually do all the things that I know bring pleasure to a woman, and I would ask her, “how does that feel for you? Are you enjoying this?
How do you like the pressure?
I want to please you and I want to make you feel amazing.”
Don’t say, “I want to give you an orgasm.”
Don’t tell her you want her to scream and yell.
Just say, “I want to make you feel wonderful. Okay?”
And take your time. Allow her to open up and allow her to see sex in an entirely different light. Don’t expect the magical orgasm right away. Don’t expect her to open up immediately.
Your only job is to show her – through a soothing, relaxing, attentive sexual session – just how great sex can be.
Another way to do it, too, is when you’re having sex with her, is to do the opposite of what the pump and dumpers have done.
Hold her really close to you so she can feel the tightness and feel the sensuality of sex, and then grind in very slowly as you pull her close to you. That way your pubic bone is actually massaging her clit at the same time. By doing that and staying deep inside her, you’re going to give her feelings that she has not had before and you’re going to get her to open up.
You may actually get her to start having a clitoral orgasm that way, in time.
You are also going to show her a different side of sex, going to show her the sensuality of sex so that she can feel protected, warm, and nurtured during the experience.
Right now, all she feels is used. All she feels is that guys want to get inside, get off, and leave.
So you’ve got to deal with the fact that she was with Mr. P & D. You’ve got to be tender and warm, and you’ve got to put absolutely no pressure on her at all.
By following these simple steps, you’re going to make her feel really comfortable, and you’re going to be able to get her to explore herself even more. She’ll surrender herself to you, in time, but you need to be very patient – because the other guys, the Mr. P & Ds, were not patient.
It’s your turn to be patient now.
To learn more from The Art of Charm about how to meet & attract women, visit www.afterhello.com And, if you're an LA local, you can stop by The Art of Charm office and meet the crew!
So no crazy learning on my submissive side this week. A fairly normal week, actually a pie making week.
MMMMM PIIIEEEE!!!
The week started off with Michael being insanely ill with a temperature so high he should have let me take him to the hospital. And for once I had to work all week, and he only worked one day and it was with me. Although the guy I banged for work all week was him, the rest were girls. Its kind of unfair he gets to bang a new girl daily and i never get booked to bang another dude. I don't get it. Not that i feel this desire to bang other people non stop, but it does easy the fact he bangs someone else non stop. Even though its just for work. Ok ranted there. Oh Porn. At Least I have some feelings about it!
At Michaels and I shoot, the director Bobby had a over grown lemon tree so on top of payment in monies I also got lemons! The best part of this scene was I got to embarrass michael and his lack of knowledge of video games, the set up was "My Sisters Hot Friend" for Naughty America. I was the hot friend. and he took my video games and sucked at them! haha also small little side note that made me happy inside, during the scene I quote the "Unforgivable" youtube video "bitch you aint no nerd, I thought you was a nerd!" Then I went home and backed a lemon meringue pie from scratch for the first time! I followed me favorite cooking genius chef and nerd crush Alton Brown. I swear you cant fail when you listen to him *swoon*
Then I discovered an hour on the elliptical goes much faster with watching Walk Dead on my ipad. Although I start shaking my fists at the screen when i get scared and probably look nuts to everyone else there, but hey work out goal met!
Friday night I went to a random house party Nicki Hunter invited me to and guess who I get to meet!? The writer and producer for Xena! Laugh I don't care! I freaking love Xena and getting to hear the ins and out and secrets from set. Literally once our conversation about the show was over, I was ready to go because nothing could top that.
Then Saturday, Michael and I went to Dr. Suzys for her 19th wedding anniversary show. I really love her and her husband they are great. But the best part of the night is I got to meet, and totally randomly, Voltaire! Neither of us knew the other one was going to be there. We've been talking online since 2004. Back when we were both suicide girls. I looked up to her so much when I was younger. She was "The" Suicide Girl, then eventually told them to shoe it because they run and awful bushiness (I did too). All that aside. She was amazingly beautiful and smart. Everything I imagined. It was so surreal to meet he because she doesn't even live in LA anymore she was just visiting. Its so wonderful to meet a role model and they end up being everything you wanted. She came and stayed that night and I made her a nice southern breakfast before she left.
Friday, July 8, 2011 at 10:57AM
I have a dilemma..... I have a guy friend who I've known for quite some time and only recently have I realized I actually kinda like this guy - let's call him Mike. He's chill, he's a gentleman, he makes me laugh. He treats me better than the guy who just broke my heart. Mike wants to take me out, and see me when he's in town. That's right he doesn't live here, but he's here quite often for work.
