#NerdsUnite: Exes are Exes for a reason

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Jordan. He was one of the first writers here on TNTML and he's a really rad mofo. I forget how we first started talking - but he lives allllllll the way over in Kansas and wants to talk to you about life from his side of the monitor in the keyword of nerd. I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT JORDAN!! </editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @SaintPepsi

I don’t know how many of you have either been cheated on or cheated on someone else. I don’t know what you did in your relationships to end it, but I will guess there was a pretty good reason you broke up. They don’t call it a break up because everything is working out. Even if you or your significant other only got cold feet. There is always a reason you stray from those you once held dear. So why is it after most other failed romances we seem so intent on going back to those we once found so alluring.
 
Most of the time I would say it has to do with the comfort of someone who knows you. It’s easy to get back into a relationship, especially if the other was lonely then too. Still, it creates this great power rift. You may feel fine in the beginning, but then all the complications of before rise up like zombies. See problems never go away and running from them never works. So you try and face them head on. Obviously, you are a changed person now and presumably so are they. Not really. Let’s face it people don’t really change.
 
Most importantly, there is suddenly a power gap. Whichever one of you that takes the other back has all the power. Obviously, they didn’t have to take you back. So they hold all the cards. Don’t believe me... Look at Family Guy. Fox canceled them and after millions of fans told them how dumb they were they begged them to come back. That’s a first for Fox, I mean they didn’t even bring back Firefly after their rabid fans probably threatened the heads of Fox with violence. So now Family guy gets to do whatever it wants to. Seriously, Fox already admitted they fucked up and so nothing they say will hold any merit even as Family Guy slips further and further into the weird and odd with seldom a laugh to go with it. Fox hasn’t the balls to cancel them again. Even going so far as to give them 2 spin off shows both way worse than Family Guy. Anyway, Family Guy rant over.
 
The point is; whoever takes back the other person can and even unknowingly will hold that over them. If they cheated on them they can act more guarded and suspicious when they aren’t around. It’s their right, you fucked up. Take that scenario and apply it to whatever reason you broke up and suddenly you start to resent them for this control. You hate that there is a 90/10 ratio of power where at one time it was 60/40. See that’s how relationships will always be. A solid 60/40 ratio for power balance. One of you will always have power over the other and if the relationship is healthy that power will fluctuate back and forth. Be honest there is never a 50/50. If either of you can say no to the other and mean it, there is a slight power balance. Simple as that. So in light of that news keep Ex’s to the past. It’s bad enough you call them when you get drunk. They don’t like it and you don’t like it when your Ex’s do it to you.
 
The best and might I add most mature thing you can do is just let them go. Wait out the madness and try to be friends with a strict no fucking rule. Yes, friendship can exist after a breakup. Why not? You spent how much of your life trying to learn everything about this person. You just might be amazing friends and horrible lovers. Just remember keep it a friendship. Yes Ex sex can be amazing, but it always leaves one person wanting more. Even if you set down boundaries and you have firmly established rules to it. Ex sex is only allowed during the 3 month post relationship phase when neither of you have found anyone new and even then it’s frowned upon. You gotta move on.

Pull your head up and realize there’s some billion people in the world. Just cause this one didn’t work out, doesn’t mean you will be alone forever. No one is unlovable, there is and will be someone that will come along in your life and throw you for a whole new loop. Whisk you off your feet and make you forget that the Ex was ever a possibility. How are you gonna find that person if you are too busy haunting your lost lovers Facebook page and not out there meeting the friends that will invite you to that one party with that guy you didn’t know... but there was this person off in the corner and you got to talking and holy crap they are awesome. That’s the reality of life. Immobility breeds despair and Action breeds results. So let’s move on and get a little action.

#nerdsunite

click here to follow Jordan on the twittah!

#NerdsUnite: It All Started With a Kiss

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Jordan. He was one of the first writers here on TNTML and he's a really rad mofo. I forget how we first started talking - but he lives allllllll the way over in Kansas and wants to talk to you about life from his side of the monitor in the keyword of nerd. I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT JORDAN!! </editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @SaintPepsi

So there I was alone again for New Years. It would seem holidays and I rarely get along. No one was even in Manhattan, KS for New Year’s. Luckily, my friend Bri came out so I actually had someone to hang out with.

It was snowing and cold as balls. I had no intention of making a mad dash to find someone to kiss for New Years. For the last few months I had basically, given up on my search for a girl. A few sparks that quickly died with barely so much as a fire started. So I was content with my bachelorhood. Settling in for the long winter ahead.

Midnight struck and Bri kisses her boyfriend and I am left staring up at the lasers hitting snow and illuminating it, creating a look like glitter falling everywhere. If ever there was a magical moment it should be now. I turned and said who is giving me a New Year’s kiss. Three guys took off assuming I meant them. So I parted ways with Bri intent on heading home soon thereafter. She doesn't do well in the cold and as cold as it was I didn’t blame her for taking off so soon after midnight.  Still I figured I would take one turn around the ville to see if anyone else I knew was out and about. Knowing I had friends at this tiny and might I add horrible bar at the end of the road I decided to start there.

A gay friend of mine was drinking there and I figured if nothing else I could get a New Year’s kiss from him. I did! It wasn’t all fireworks, but I’m sure there was some glitter involved. I was slightly content. Hey! At least I got a New Year’s kiss and I was a bit far gone on Champlain. Walking outside for a smoke I looked up and from the swirling snow a girl is walking towards me that used to work at the Plasma center. I yelled “PLASMA GIRL.” She said, “or Kristi!” with a slight annoyance and come to find out later she really hated being called Plasma girl. I asked her what brought her to this dark corner of the ville. She replied she was coming to see the same friend I was hanging out with. “What a crazy random happenstance!” I mentioned, “That's who I'm here with.” Then I asked if she had gotten her New Year’s kiss yet? Keep in mind I had 2 bottles of bubbly confidence residing in my belly. She said, “I’ve never gotten a New Year’s kiss before.” So I just leaned in a kissed her. Just like that. Seriously, I surprised myself. I fully anticipated getting slapped. She just smiled and we both walked into the bar. That smile. I tell you what I was hooked. We all went from bar to bar after that and parted ways for the night later.

The next day I messaged her on Facebook letting her know I didn't mean to steal a kiss and if she wanted to: I would love to take her out for a legit date. Promising that my Facebook photos were kinda lying in how crazy they made me seem. Generally, I come to find out most to be friends and especially girl are terrified by the initial research into my Facebook page. Well they are kinda true, but usually only half the story. Still she said yes. Keep in mind I entered into this under a safe assumption she would say no. No belly full of confidence this time. So you can imagine my surprise when she said. “Yes.” To clarify I said date. I have found not calling things dates in the past, rarely worked out in my favor.  So that following Wednesday, even though I had to wake up at 5 am the next morning, I was going to power through. It had been a while since I had been on a legit date. So we met up for coffee around 7:30. Talked till they closed down and moved it to a local bar. Then on to Mae's and almost closed them down. I walked her to her car and we said our goodbyes. I didn't know how the rule went for kissing; as we had already done that so I just reset the date meter and gave her a lingering hug. Which was matched in return. She told me we had to go see Les Miserable the following week. I told her, “Sure if you want to see me cry.” To which she replied, “Of course and I’ll make fun of you for crying.”  So yeah! She scheduled the next date. A girl that's actually into me and I don't have to chase like it's the end of the world. Did I mention she has a smile that lights up a room.

Les Miserable is not a date movie. It is very long and painful to watch. Don’t get me wrong it’s a beautiful movie, wonderful acting, great singers. Absolutely filled with sadness. We did not leave that theater feeling uplifted at all. So I had been feeling sick this week. A horrible trade off. When I went to drop her off at home I told her, “I really wanted to kiss you goodnight, however I have a head cold and didn’t want you to get sick.” Without hesitation or pause for thought she fires back, “I’ve had my shots!” We kiss! That’s movie timing folks. This girl is the bee’s knees. Crazy how I was not looking for a girl, deciding to totally sign off on the search for someone and life just lets one in. I’m not complaining either. This girl actually has her life together. She isn’t crazy, at least not in the way I am used to girls being crazy. I have actually been having a hard time just accepting the happiness that has come with this. I’m used to so much drama, to me fighting so hard to prove myself as a worthy contender for a girls heart. That when this girl accepted mine it left me in stark disbelief. Almost waiting for the hammer to drop. Something in the back of my mind saying, “Nope it’s too good to be true something horrible is about to happen.” Time to silence both my mind and any of the disbelief and just be content that maybe, just maybe I have lucked out in finding a remarkable woman whom I shall not be taking for granted.  I can’t wait to see where this coupling leads me. If happiness is the byproduct of a few weeks then a joy filled life might just be the result of further time spent with her.

#nerdsunite

click here to follow Jordan on the twittah!

#NerdsUnite: Caught Up In Kissing

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Jordan. He was one of the first writers here on TNTML and he's a really rad mofo. I forget how we first started talking - but he lives allllllll the way over in Kansas and wants to talk to you about life from his side of the monitor in the keyword of nerd. I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT JORDAN!! </editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @SaintPepsi

It should come as no shock that a kiss can change your entire perspective of a person. That single moment when you lock lips and emotions flow through you. It can be as equally powerful, as it can be tragic. The not knowing and the first step towards something new or the end of something hoped for. We are all aware of the power of a kiss. It signifies a desire to communicate passion and love without words ever being uttered. It’s the willing embrace of your deepest desires. So what happens when the person you have become so fond of is a bad kisser. Goddamn it all! It ruins everything. Kisses are important. The reality is that no one is a bad kisser. Your likes and dislikes in this area determine how you perceive a kiss to be. Needless to say we all have our personal perceptions of what a good kiss should be. Some people are all for the face hugging alien assault type. That’s just not my thing. Now I was a virgin until I was 26. I know, I can hear the shock in your minds. So to maintain a good physical relationship there were two things I had to be good at. Kissing and other things involving my tongue. I also got really good at touch. So I applied the same sensitivity I did with the art of touch to kissing. Start soft and compassionate. If the mood intensifies so can the kisses. Just don’t go crazy. For me if your mouth overlaps all of mine it’s a little off putting for sure. If you lick my face also slightly odd. Let’s just say, its like that scene in a movie when something jumps out at you that shouldn’t belong and you are immediately taken out of the experience.

So I have never told someone they are a bad kisser. If I felt like they were and believe me I have met a few. I was a full blown make out whore for a while. Like I said, to each their own and I’m sure there are people out there that will find your brand of tongue sucking just right for them. I find the best way to kiss is to follow the lead of the person you are kissing. Start small and work your way into your more affectionate forms of lip locking. Treat it like someone takes you out to eat on their dime. Wait to see what they order so you know an appropriate price range. You don’t want to jump right for the KC Strip if they are only getting a salad. It throws everything off kilter. So as the passion plays out you investigate what turns them on most in this most intimate exchange. As I said start soft with light kisses on the lips. Slow methodically and innocent. If she purses her lips, it will mean things probably won’t go much further on this date. If her mouth slowly starts to open, it’s inviting you to enter the next zone.

Where your bodies close in on each other. You will most likely turn your head slightly as noses are a bitch and get in the way. This is your classic movie kiss. At this point you are golden. Obviously, she likes you and has responded to your invocation with her own invitation. You can then graduate to a mixture of two things. Personally, I like to lightly bite the bottom lip. It’s not so much a bold move, as it is a powerful determiner of her desire. It responds to the way she may bite her own lip when her raw want exceeds her will to contain it. The bottom lip bite is generally a sign she wants you; so if you lightly bite her bottom lip it only intensifies her own passion. This should be done in heavy moderation. You aren’t a fucking vampire and if you draw blood or bruise her you can rest assured she won’t forget that. That is unless she’s into that sort of thing, which in that case you have a world full of hurt and bruises coming your way. She will assume you are a biter as well and you will no doubt end up with teeth marks spread across you like some kinda hybrid cheetah.

So all good things to those that wait I suppose. Return to your kissing as she pushes into you or you into her. Make sure you are braced on something or she is. This will allow you to maintain your composure as well as accept her demands. For me personally, I like to be the one braced, so I can slide down a bit. With my height (I’m 6’6”) it allows me a better ability to meet at her level, instead of forcing her to move up and strain her neck. Next step is a light flick of the tongue to her top lip. This will generally be met with an immediate tongue response if she is so inclined. You have opened the field of play in the French zone and this area is where things get fantastic. Now you are free to explore, you get to wage a feral war of the tongues. Once again don’t get crazy or sloppy. Saliva dripping anywhere means things have gone a little too far. There you have it. After that it’s a game of roaming while fully clothed this mostly consists of kisses to the ears... you would be surprised at just how sensitive ears can be. The neck is always a sweet spot and leaves a lady wanting you to explore more.

So like I said everyone has their own brand of what they like to give and receive. Experiment with a lover and find out just what all you like and don’t like. Be open and honest and most importantly if you are committed, communicate. Communicate all things sexual. Not telling someone something is off, will only leave you dissatisfied if you are already in a relationship. Most importantly especially with guys if you fake it trust me when i say guys will do it again. Guys are generally robotic in their learning curve, while girls are more fluid. To us if something works once it will most likely work again. Not always the case with girls. Variety is the spice of life, some things will always be favorites but that doesn’t mean you have to grow stale in your love life. Other than that have fun and know each other’s boundaries. Luckily, most recently the girl I kissed was wonderful in my view. We shall see just how we play out to each other’s desires and if we mesh well... well things should be more desirable. Just remember not everyone out there will have the same likes and dislikes as you. Know yourself first and through your knowledge others can know you better.

#nerdsunite

click here to follow Jordan on the twittah!

#NerdsUnite: Hashing it out "Define Creepy" (saintpepsi vs. Ables)

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Jordan. He was one of the first writers here on TNTML and he's a really rad mofo. I forget how we first started talking - but he lives allllllll the way over in Kansas and wants to talk to you about life from his side of the monitor in the keyword of nerd. I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT JORDAN!! </editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @SaintPepsi

Welcome to a new collaboration.

Meet Andrew Ables.

We are in many senses very different and yet he has been a part of my life and basically my family since he became friends with my brother Stephen. We hold no animosity for each other yet we can find ourselves in disagreements here and there.

He’s a Player by trade with a smile and body used to percolate a girls senses, he is both abrasive and forth right. Still beyond his well chiseled exterior, is a mind that he has given equal attention to, making him a powerful tool for mischief. Now myself not being um... chiseled from stone; have on occasion pushed him into my general category of dumb jocks. Which I know he isn’t, a man whore kinda. Dumb jock not at all. 

With that being said recently he and I exchanged a talk on Facebook chat after he introduced himself to a friend of mine via third person, which I contend is just bad form. While it was a line from HIMYM it is the job of the wingman to speak this line not the intended. So I called him creepy. This lead to a few lines about the definition of creepy. Something I have written about in the past on this site. Don’t be that dude, “The Creeper.” See he thinks it’s creepier to be a creep in the background with someone never knowing you are doing it, as opposed to being creepy in the open. I am of the other view. Be it in real life on the net I think it’s far more creepy to make it known.  So we have decided to hash it out OPEN BLOG STYLE!!!! So Ables, make your assessment on creepers in the shadows.

Ables:

Here goes, whores get paid, I have not ever been paid for sexual activity, therefore, am not a whore. With that being straightened out, we can now move forward to discuss the art of being creepy, and what makes a “creeper” a creepy dude (or lady). Now, if you get on Facebook, and don’t plan on there being some creepy elements, you’re gonna have a bad time (name that meme). Facebook is completely designed around being creepy, if Facebook were not creepy, there is a good chance no one would be using it right now. Hence the new verb usage “I’m going to go creep on their profile”. This is all a bit misdirected, but it has purpose for my argument, which is simply: Creepy = Unknowning. After all there is nothing to fear but fear itself right? (name that guy). Jordan thinks I am creepy because his friend sang this song (which I watched all the way through mind you), and I commented “Hey, have you met Jordan’s friend Andrew?” Haha funny right? I know, I wrote it. Jordan tells me to stop being creepy...HOW is that creepy? To me, watching you sing your song, and reading your conversation with our mutual friend without you knowing is more creepy than making you aware of my appearance. Well, perhaps my opening (which admittedly sounds like I am hitting on her...but for me, it’s kind of like saying hello..so..yeah) Could I have practiced more couth and been like “oh Jordan, your friend’s song is super cool”, yeah I could have, but you know who says stuff like that? Everyone else in the freaking world. Guess what? I am memorable, people rarely forget who I am. And I am getting off topic again. So, Creepy is directly correlated with how much of the situation you are aware of. Complete understanding of any situation = not creepy. The less you know, the more you fear (which is a dramatic form of creeped), and therefore everyone should get educated and rise up against politicians. Damn, I suck at this staying on task thing.

Jordan:

I will attest to Andrew being very memorable. Still to me the not knowing is far less creepy. He asked me in chat, “Let’s put it into a real life scenario; watching you in the bathroom with you not knowing or watching you in the bathroom after I knocked and came through the door?” I personally would say the person that walked through the door. You won’t ever be creeped out by the unknown. So while the small statement Andrew made as an opening line wasn’t that creepy at all really. I mean he could have said something way worse. Knowing him personally, I know that was a very real probability. Still, he isn’t fully unashamed and so I may have been overzealous in my approach to his sentence. See, I have only ever been creeped out by people I know are fully creeping on me. When someone goes through your whole feed liking everything you have said or done. Going back years sometimes. That will full on freak me out. If they just go through it all and not like or comment on things, especially things going years back. I don’t have to feel freaked out. It’s the knowing that makes you freak out. Finding out that someone has pictures of you lining a room in their basement, will make you second guess your relationship with them. Still if I don’t know I don’t have to be bothered to care about it. In general obviously, girls deal with this way more. I know though of several girls that will haunt the pages of their Ex’s or find a boy they obsess over and follow everything he does. Don’t tell me you don’t start to wonder about the person that somehow always likes everything you do and comments about things you post the second after you post them every time. At first it’s flattering and then you just start to over analyze it. So yes I think the creeper you know, is far creepier than the one you don’t.

Ables:

But everyone does it, you should EXPECT people to creep on you. Also, you are more than likely just as guilty yourself of doing it. How can you scrutinize someone else for doing something you’re just as guilty of? (Minus the “liking” everything..that’s just weird”. Also, in reference to the bathroom thing, if I were in the bathroom with you, any amount of money says your behavior changes. When you feel as though no one is watching you, you’re incredibly vulnerable, anyone who has ever been snuck up on, or caught red handed doing something they don’t do around people, knows this feeling. One time in the dorms, I was looking out the window (like 7 floors up), and I was watching people (because face it, we’re all people watchers..it’s natural), then I got to thinking, how often am I being watched when I can’t tell if someone is watching me? To me, that is creepy. Being on stage = not creepy. Stalker, that stalks you, without you knowing? Creepy. Stalker that you met at a bar one night and won’t leave you alone? Annoying as hell. With all that being said, “creepy” is also directly correlated with how attractive the “creeper” is...creepy and romantic are really not so different.

Jordan:

So true there the line between creepy and romantic is so thin it’s almost microscopic. That’s probably why Facebook is the worst thing ever for getting over a relationship you were fully invested in. So while my actions may change if you are in the bathroom watching me pee. I guess I’ve never really felt vulnerable thinking people could be watching me or catch me unaware. I think recently especially. The amount of cameras and devices constantly monitoring us is crazy. Our cell phones have the ability to track where we are going all the time, people can hack our computers and remote access our webcams and watch us while we sleep. Face it! Anymore the world is watching. I have just grown accustomed to it. I guess that is why the known creep is more distracting than the shadow creep.

So in closing we have all been creepy at some time. Be it from the shadows or openly. The reality is we need to find that happy medium and once we have established a good report with someone then they can see the rest of our creepy aspects and we can see theirs. Let’s face it we all have our obsessions. Our friends and loved ones are just the ones that accept ours and deal with our weirdness.

#nerdsunite

click here to follow Jordan on the twittah!

#NerdsUnite: The Relationship (The One That Wasn't- Part 3)

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Jordan. He was one of the first writers here on TNTML and he's a really rad mofo. I forget how we first started talking - but he lives allllllll the way over in Kansas and wants to talk to you about life from his side of the monitor in the keyword of nerd. I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT JORDAN!! </editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @SaintPepsi

It was a few more days before she actually talked to me again and was excited to see me.  She's always excited to see me. I hoped it was because she had figured out just what to do with whatever we had become.

Much to my surprise it was to tell me, that over the weekend she had found, “The ONE!” The perfect guy for her and that must have been why her heart wouldn't let her fall for me. I was really stunned at this point. I just gritted my teeth and tried to smile for her new found happiness, screaming on the inside. She saw it written all over my face. Told me it was probably a bad time to have told me that. Ya think? I told her it wasn't, in a bit of a bitter tone, that in doing so it sealed the deal on my heart ache. Which it did, it cauterized it with fire. Because of that I was able to instantly cut her heart strings from mine. She explained that it was because he was so much like her. That with me I had this barrier of happiness flowing around me. That is stopped any bad from entering into me.

I had never really thought about it that way. She contended that because of that barrier, I had never really had to give up the girls I had dated. That I bounced back so fast, I never allowed myself to truly feel pain. So since each of those girls still had active parts of my heart, I couldn't have ever really given her my whole heart. I told her I had given her my whole heart, I had given her my all. She said she needed it all, not just what was left. In that moment my barrier shattered. The barrier I just found out was there, came crashing down and the heartache of 12 years came streaming into me all at once. I felt sick. Really sick. I ran into my room and put on, “As the world falls down” by Girl in a Coma. Yeah I felt like a teenage girl. Just lying there in my bed trying to breathe, trying not to cry. She came in and jumped on me and the bed and told me I wasn't allowed to feel pain. I was cursed with happiness and that’s not such a bad curse. She brought me back up. She helped me piece together my barrier then and it’s still not as powerful as it once was. She held me that night as the darkest parts of my past fought to get inside me. Truly, one of my darkest days.

She promised I would always have her love, even if that didn't mean having her heart. She wasn't going anywhere. I knew better though. The whole dynamic was about to change. She had found someone else to be with. She was moving on and to her it wasn't drastic. She didn't have to change anything really when it came to us, because she had only ever seen me as a friend. I guess... I still felt she had seen me as more, but that’s beside the point now.  For me it was a fight with reality. I had to change my stars. I had to readjust the whole of the way I saw her. I had to stop loving and longing for her. It was a very hard week.
 
We had been scheduled to go see a Dropkick Murphey’s show after my birthday that following weekend. A birthday she gracefully dipped out on. Probably for the best in that regard I’m pretty sure most of my friends were out for her blood at this point. They can be very protective. One even had a gun... not even kidding. Of course that girl always carries a gun. The concert grew near and she was still very hard to get a hold of. Still, when I did talk to her she was confident she was going. Not until the day of the show did I see her again and she gave me the same big hug as always. In that instant she felt that everything had changed. She questioned me, called me a liar when I said I was fine, and tried to read my silence. We had a third wheel with us though and I didn't want to talk about it in front of him. I could barely look at her the whole way there.

When we got there, I stole some time with her and told her how everything had changed. How I couldn't be with her the way I had been. She understood, but I told her it would take some time. I knew this was the beginning of the end for what we had created. I knew she would always be there for me if I needed her. Just not the way I had hoped. Luckily, spending 3 hours in a punk rock mosh pit slamming into each other took away the bitter taste I had in my mouth for her sudden absence in my life. We both got out a lot of our frustrations that night. It was an amazing show, we came home and crashed out again in my bed. Still I was done mentally; I hadn't tears to spare for her anymore, nor sentiment to give her from my heart. Those paths had all been taken and I wasn't falling again. Who knows what the future holds for us both? I know we love each other, of that she has told me many times. It’s not quite the type of love I was looking for. I want it all. I want the girl to be mine fully. I still need to seek the one for me. I’m sure she’s out there. I have just grown so tired of the games I have to play to get there. Seems everyone is looking to build a relationship with a stranger, to find someone to love that they have never met. What I want to do is build a foundation with someone. So that when we do get into the relationship part, what we build is a solid on a foundation centered on trust. We had that, she was missing the spark though. That’s why the fall hurt so much. I had that spark for her. We had spent so long on our foundation that it was sad not to be able to build on that, to craft a future together. What we build there will be a structure of friendship. Not a house for love. So I guess I’m back to looking for a new girl to let me craft a foundation with.

You see I like to court a girl. I like the old fashioned approach to love where you get to know a person and then decide if you want to spend the rest of your life with them. That’s the building blocks of a solid relationship, one that will stand the test of time, where you truly do become the best of friends, and life just comes together perfectly through trial and error. I haven’t found it yet and I don’t know if I’ll survive the next fall if it turns out not to be the one. This one was too close for comfort. Still I will persevere. I will fight because deep down I am and always will be a hopeless romantic. I may always go after the impossible, but that’s because I dream big. I know what I can get and I shoot for the moon. The stars will keep me company and the night sky will be the highway to our lives. The love I find will be that of legend and tales will be told for ages to come.

Let me tell you this dear readers, when love finally works out for me that girl will be my Goddess. I will worship the ground she walks on.  She will be my everything and my heart will forever be hers. Until that time I will continue to wander delighting in any adventure along the way. Adding story after story to my chest of memories. Until I find the girl who looks at me with wide eyes, eager to hear another story, to be part of them, to be my eternal fire. Lord willing this will happen soon. I don’t do well alone. I feel I was made for companionship. So here's to my future companion. May the wind blow you ever closer to me with each passing day, may the gods you worship grant you the sight to see me, and may your troubles be not so great as to obscure our coupling.

#nerdsunite

click here to follow Jordan on the twittah!