OMG! This just appeared in my newsfeed, and I'm totally dying.
Ladies and Germie men, I present to you ... The ladies of TSA
Miss January
Miss February
Miss March
Miss April
Miss May
Miss June
Miss July
Miss August
Miss September
Miss October
Miss November
Miss December
MMMMMMM That December is gonna keep me nice and toasty ..... MMMM I love it when you arch your spine like that.
Thanks for the post, Denise!
okay so yesterday wikileaks dropped it's latest info bomb. some of it was classified some of it wasnt. and wikileaks didnt really drop it the news agencies did. wikileaks gave stuff to five outlets -- the new york times (u.s.), the guardian (uk), der spiegel (germany), el pais (spain) and le monde (france). there was a team of 120 people i think who went over everything and removed names of people and vetted everything and tried to find out what was relevant. we are in the age of information overload and we need people to sift through information to get the real knowledge. we also need people to sift through the knowledge to get the real wisdom, but that takes longer. anyway the papers released stuff yesterday. the internet got hot. news junkies got excited. there's already a lot happening what with korea and the european financial crap and everything else. so it was a fast news day. i was dealing with it in real time it was nuts. there is a lot of stuff in the wikileaks documents involving the behavior of the u.s. state department and what we are talking about with other countries. stories will develop involving why people will say we should attack iran. the saudis are really pushing for this apparently. also we spy on everyone in the u.n. and did some crazy hacking in china. maybe google was in on it lol. but i'm not really looking to write about that. that stuff will all come out in the papers. i recommend the guradian and der spiegel. check the foreign press to get perspective people, even so called liberal papers like the new york times and the washington post are very often part of the u.s. state-corporate propaganda machine.
anyway though that's not what i want to write about. the tntml angle involves the social media aspect and the internet and stuff. for me this mainly involved two things, twitter and ustream. when the stories started breaking i was on twitter and at ustream. on twitter i follow a lot of news junkies and political people. @digby56, @emptywheel, @timothys, @ggreenwald and @barryeisler are all great. tim and barry are my favorite they are both hip and know about the cia and stuff. i also follow some news feeds. so the links were flowing and there was good commentary. those guys are not big mainstream people but they are fairly conventional. i consider them respectable. so i was keeping track of what they were doing. they were tweeting a lot and shit was happening fast. twitter was really a-twitter for me lol. i bet i'm the first person ever to say that in the history of the internet. anyway it was happening in real time like i say. meanwhile newspapers wouldnt be out for another day and the t.v. stations were taking their sweetass time because they're a bunch of freaking dinosaurs. so twitter was feedin me. i was getting perspective from these smart people and trying to skim through articles there. this already wouldve kept me busy enough
but i had other things going on over at ustream. ustream is really fun. sometimes i go there when @jenfriel broadcasts though i dont chat or anything. anyway you have a person streaming on video while there is also a chatroom going. very fun. forget t.v. man this is so much more democratic and interactive. you're not just sitting there watching someone you'll never talk to in your life you are interacting with the people broadcasting and the other people watching. this makes it such a more interesting medium. the ustream show i was at was called deadtv. it's usually music but there are news and interviews too. it's hosted by anton newcombe of the brian jonestown massacre, one of my favorite bands of all time, and it's his friends and fans hanging out there. anton is a madman. he plays lots of really cool music, he is a total audiophile, but he's also a news junkie. very well informed and interesting. i dont agree with some of the stuff he says, he is a little too far into the shadows of fringe conspiracy stuff but he's well informed too. a little paranoid lol. i mean he's very crazy in general. but it was really fun experiencing the news with him. we were listening to music with people and chatting about stuff and the mod of the chat is a news junkie so we were talking about wikileaks and like when is the story gonna drop. for me this was sunday. lol fuck church and football and all that i wanted me some world theater drama and some information age revolution dig it. we are in an actual age of revolution in a lot of ways. i have talked about that with @jenfriel a bit. she sees how much stuff is changing. this sunday was a great example.
so while t.v. was dragging it's dinosaur ass and probably talking about lindsay lohans tits in rehab or whatever i was in a chatroom with one of my favorite rocknroll musicians who stopped music to surf news stuff on his show and talk about it while we chatted. me and the mod of the chat were getting links and telling the other people tons of stuff. i was kind of new but i can be very loquacious in a chat so i just talked a lot and since i knew a lot and can do web stuff fast in real time it was all good and i wasnt seen as spamming or flooding the chat or anything which was good. so i'm getting links from my feed and astrodaise the mod is getting links and we are breaking it down for people in the chatbox as anton is talking about it and stuff. anton lives in germany and is very critical of the u.s. he's an angry expatriot which i enjoy. i think my conservative friends back in jersey think i am a freedom hating evil doer but i love freedom and rock n roll so i consider myself a real american lol. in a democracy dissent and critical thought are way more important than jingoism and blind loyalty because we the people are supposed to govern ourselves. in order to do this we need to know what is going on that's why media transparency and free information are important, and we need to talk about it all to decide as a group what's right and that's why free expression, open dialogue and new media are important.
so in this chatroom at ustream there were people from america and europe mostly. one guy from mexico i think. some folks from germany and britain. some new york city people. i like having non americans in the mix for a more mixed perspective. and not only is this going on but anton newcombe is actually participating in the discussion a bunch, which was totally far out. this guy is one of my faves! ever! his music changed my life. and we were talking about the news as it comes in. people there are all like anarchists on acid though lol so a lot of them think julian assange is working for the mossad and the cia because he wouldnt still be alive otherwise. i'm not inclined to believe that. it doesnt add up based on what i've read. i think he really is an information cowboy on the new frontier. a lot of people think he should be dead because he puts lives in danger. i can understand that but i disagree. it's complex however and i enjoy talking to smart people who disagree with me about it as long as they arent jerks. as it developed though it was interesting. because we were interpreting it all in real time during the information overload. all this news is coming out and we have different people doing research and giving bits of commentary while others watch and learn. what's cool is that i am pretty good at research and can be fast in a chatroom so i made a good first impression on this new crowd and made friends with the mod of the chat who was doing a lot of great fast research too. so we're posting links and speedreading articles and cutting and pasting relevant text and all that. it was so freaking nerdy but so cool at the same time. it was new media nerdiness and real rocknroll. it damn near broke the needle on the nerdometer in my brain and blew a tube in the amp of my of my rocknroll heart. it was one of those days where i am hanging out on the internet and realize that we are witnessing the dawning of a new light and lo it is totally groovy yea verily brothers and sisters. and none of it was really planned or anything.
it helped having my twitter feed tailored to get me smart commentary and great links. twitter is the kind of thing where it can be a bunch of trivial b.s. but in terms of current events twitter is supercool because it becomes this giant virtual newsroom where regular people get to mix it up with reporters and interact and see how other people are talking and what links and opinions are going around. and because i'd gotten in the habit of doing this i came in really handy in the chat and made some cool new rock n roll friends. it was great. well i guess i better shut up because i am running on. but before i go i'll say this -- when guys like the pope and president obama speak out against the new technologies and say that people are getting too distracted, which both of those guys have said, just remember, they are not who it's for. all of this stuff is for us. we can let it make us into an attention deficit nation, we already have to some extent, but we can also let it facilitate a massive change in consciousness and politics. there are tons of options. and it can be real fun. most of the t.v. news comes from rich corporations whose interests are not the same as those of the general public and who pursue certain goals that are pretty damn shady. but right now there is a lot of interesting information out there and there are a lot of really interesting people talking about it. for nerds like me it does not get any better than days like this. well, except for the part about finding out what scumbags politicians and diplomats are. not that i didnt know that already but you know what i mean. rock on borhters and sisters. over and out.
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SOOO ... I posted this blessed little post not that long ago ... and there is an update ... the lawyer and I are totally not going anywhere. At least not together in any fashion ... *sad face*
Few things.
1. I live life with no expectations. It keeps me sane ... so you have to understand, this post is more for your benefit. I really don't dig that happily ever after bullshit. Sorry, but really true. I am my own happily ever after. Through and through.
2. I am grateful to even have experienced those kind of feelings for anyone again. See, last year I had my heart broken. (See post here) It was bad.
Like crazy bad. Like so crazy bad I started this website from it. It's kosher though, you have no idea the joy I receive now after dating someone who was definitely a quasi celeb, but thought I was a little out of my head when it came to my beliefs in social media and where all of it was going. If we were still dating I wouldn't have this site, so I would have just been doing this for him. Now who's laughing ... suckkkkaaaaaaaaa!!! My twitter account got verified before yours did!! Nah ne nah ne poopy!!
Anywho, back to the gratitude. I am just grateful that I ALLOWED myself emotionally to get to that level with anyone again. Which is huge!
I have massive intimacy issues. Hilarious considering I lead my life like an open book. But that just comes down to more of having nothing to lose. I do what I do because I am marketing something I believe in. It's more of a greater good thing than anything else ... but all kidding aside, I have massive intimacy issues. I just read people too well. If I can figure you out, I lose interest. I am also not a cuddler. I don't like being touched by someone unless I am crushing on them. Again, hilarious to have these issues yet have no problems with nudity or nearly getting it on multiple times in the Grotto at the Playboy Mansion. Go suck on that Freud.
Either way, Yay OkCupid for being so dead on with those personality profiles. Our dogs even had the same name - and it wasn't just the name Rocky ... we both called him "Rocky Balboa." Very weird. He's an awesome awesome awesome dude, I'm just not feeling the same vibe from him anymore. There was nothing cataclysmic that happened, it's just not there anymore. Sucks, but it happens.
I am reminded almost daily by people who's advice is unsolicited that the package that I have is much more appealing if I am single. I'd have to agree, but you have to understand that I am a lifecaster. I really don't give a flying fuck what you think. This is my art. I tell stories in real time across social media, and then post about it later.
I can't lie about my experience in any capacity or it defeats the ENTIRE purpose of the social experiment as a whole. I use a lot of "I" statements, and preface a lot of things with IMHO ... but this is my thing. It's pretty cool, and I do it well ... so sod off mate.
I honestly though knew I shouldn't have posted on him that early on into meeting him, as I knew it would be bad news ... but I didn't really care. I felt what I felt when I felt it. I won't apologize for it, and if it messed things up with him in any anything, then it wasn't meant to be to begin with. I'm only getting started. I don't plan on stopping any time soon ... so if a guy comes into my life how can I NOT post about it!?!? BAHHHHH!!! But again, I'm learning ... I'm learning ... I'm confident I'll figure it out.
I just get SOOO frustrated that I can get along with literally SOO many personalities, for reals - I am like a freak of nature in being able to relate to people ... but its not very often that I actually like someone. Happened twice in the last year. That's it. I've traveled the entire country, and talked to THOUSANDSSSSS of people ... went out on WHO KNOOWWSSSS how many dates .... and two. That's it. Just two.
Again though, 2011 is going to be hands down the BEST year of my life. Nerd is the new rockstar - I stay very busy. I can say that as humbly and just whatever as possible ... the first quarter alone is going to be insane. Are you kidding me? The Hollywood god wants the pilot in front of the network by spring time - that ALONNEEE is enough to make someone's life. *waves* Hello, dream come true! YES PLEASE!! Dude, there is so much going on with this site right now it makes my head spin. The world is awesome right now in abundance of wanting all things nerd. SUPER SUPER SUPPERR GRATEFUL!!!
So yeah ... there you go. Dude, totally didn't mean to make him a big deal. You guys are hilarious! Everytime I hung out with someone IRL it was "so where's this guy ... read the post, when can I meet him ... " It is weird though, I was looking to be of service, and I got what I was looking for by helping him in the hospital.
Life, you're a funny one. Yes ... yes you! You're awwffulllyyyy funny!!
Remember nerds, not everything in life is meant to last a lifetime. Just be. Experience the joy with someone in the present moment magic, then let it go. No anger, no hate, no nothing ... free love baby! Keeps you sane. I promise. Now, back to hustling ...
PS. W2G for the best sex I've ever had. No joke, that was like ... wait, I don't even know what that was. But it was awesome. And the best. And there you go ... feel free to refer to this post to new mates. I will def give you 2 thumbs way up! YUM YUM THX for making me cum! =)
I was chatting with this super cutie patootie pants on OKC last night ... and he flat out asked me why I was on OKC. I know ... I always hate that ... but you're so cute or you're so blah blah blah - why do you need to resort to online dating. It's like are you for REALS? Resort to it!?! I ADDOORREEE online dating!!! For me, it is based on a more logical way to find a partner. Life isn't a Disney movie - and finding a guy at a bar is just a headache, and phenomenally inefficient. I was born a nerd, I will die a nerd ... I am sure when I do meet my future ex husband, the first thing he will see is a screen name and avatar.
Per Spring.org.uk: Somewhere between one-third and three-quarters of single people with internet access have used it to try and meet someone new. But, over the years, we've heard conflicting stories about how successful it is.
Believe the internet dating companies and it's all sweetness and light, with wedding bells ringing in the distance; believe the media scare stories and it's all lying, cheating, perverted social misfits. The truth is somewhere in between, but where?
Fortunately, now there's enough research to suggest what's really going on. So, here are my 10 favourite psychological insights on internet dating.
Contrary to the stereotype, there's little evidence that internet dating is the last resort of social misfits or weirdos.
In fact, quite the reverse. Internet daters are more likely to be sociable, have high self-esteem and be low in dating anxiety (Kim et al., 2009; Valkenburg, 2007). These studies found no evidence that people use online dating because they can't hack it face-to-face. It's just one more way to meet new people.
People's motivations to start online dating are many and various, typically involving a triggering event like a break-up, but overall Barraket and Henry-Waring (2008) have found that people's motivations are less individual and more social. People aren't using online dating because they are shy but because they have moved to a new city, are working long hours or don't have time to meet anyone new.
Although 94% deny their internet dating profiles contain any fibs (Gibbs et al., 2006), psychologists are a suspicious lot. Toma et al. (2008) measured the heights and weights of 80 internet daters, as well as checking their driving licences for their real age.
When this data was compared with their profiles, it showed that nine out of ten had lied on at least one of the attributes measured, but the lies were only small ones. The most frequent offender was weight, with daters either adding or shaving off an average of 5%. Daters were more truthful about their age (1.5% deviation) and height (1.1% deviation). As expected women tended to shave off the pounds, while men gave themselves a boost in height.
These lies make little difference in the real world because the vast majority of fibbing would have been difficult to detect in person. Most people want to meet up eventually so they know big lies are going to be caught.
The saying 'the camera never lies' is bunk. Even without Photoshop to iron out the wrinkles, camera angles and lighting can easily change perceived attractiveness.
People instinctively understand this when choosing their profile photo so Toma and Hancock (2010) took photographs of internet daters, then judges compared these to the real profile photos.
Although less physically attractive people were the most likely to choose a self-enhancing photo, overall the differences were tiny. The lab photos were only a little less attractive than those chosen for online dating profiles (about 5% for women and 4% for men). Once again, internet daters weren't lying much...
Clues to which types of profile photos work come from one online dating site which has analysed 7,000 photographs in its database (oktrends, 2010):
They then looked at which photos were associated with the longest online conversations. These were where it showed the dater:
The photos associated with shorter than average conversations were (in increasing order of conversational deterrent):
(Remember, these are all associations so we can't be sure about causality.)
Even amongst a diverse population of online daters, people still prefer someone who is similar to themselves.
When Fiore and Donath (2005) examined data from 65,000 online daters, they found that people were choosing based on similarity to themselves.
In this respect online dating is no different from offline dating. On average people are looking for someone about the same as themselves. Indeed there are now many dating sites aimed at narrower demographics such as sports fans, Jewish people or those with particular medical conditions.
To examine internet dating diversity, Dutton et al. (2009) surveyed 2,670 married couples in the UK, Australia and Spain. In this sample internet daters were more likely to have a greater disparity in age and educational background compared with those who had met in more traditional ways.
Although opposites don't tend to attract, by its nature internet dating does encourage diverse matches. The authors argue that it is changing the face of marriage by bring together types of people who previously never would have met.
Getting a response online can be a hit-and-miss affair. An online dating site has gauged the response rate by analysing more than 500,000 initial contacts sent by their members (oktrends, 2009). Recipients answered only 30% of men's messages to women and 45% of women's messages to men. The percentage that lead to conversations is even lower (around 20% and 30% respectively).
The one-third response rate, which is backed up by academic research (Rosen et al., 2008), is partly because many internet dating accounts are dead.
oktrends also found that longer messages only yield a small improvement in response rate for men and nothing for women. So, don't waste your time writing an essay. Say hi and let them check out your profile.
In a study of online dating, Rosen et al., (2008) found evidence that more intense emotionality, e.g. using words like 'excited' and 'wonderful', made a better impression on both men and women.
This study also looked at the impact of self-disclosure. While the results were more variable, overall people preferred relatively low-levels of self-disclosure.
For many, but not all internet daters, the aim is to meet someone new in the flesh. In a survey of 759 internet daters, Rosen et al. (2008) found that 51% of people had made a face-to-face date within one week and one month of receiving replies to their online overtures.
This first meeting is often treated by internet daters as the final part of the screening process (Whitty & Carr, 2006). Is this person really who they say they are? And, if so, is there any chemistry? It's only after this stage is complete that people can get to know each other.
Despite all the positive things the research has to say about internet dating, there's no doubt that it can be unsatisfying and aversive. 132 online daters surveyed by Frost et al. (2008) reported that they spent 7 times as long screening other people's profiles and sending emails than they did interacting face-to-face on real dates.
Part of the problem is that people are encouraged by online dating to think in consumerist terms (Heino et al., 2010). Users are 'relationshopping': looking at other people's features, weighing them up, then choosing potential partners, as though from a catalogue; it's human relationships reduced to check-boxes.
This is more of a criticism of the technology currently available than it is of the general idea of internet dating. Frost et al. (2008) argue that this will change as online dating services move towards more experiential methods, such as virtual dates (see: why internet dating is aversive).
There's only limited data about how well internet dating works and most of this research examined heterosexual daters. Still, Rosen et al. (2008) found that 29% of their sample had found serious relationships through internet dating. Dutton et al. (2009) found that about 6% of married couples had met online in the UK, 5% in Spain and 9% in Australia. Looking at just younger people the percentages were much higher:
If a long-term relationship is what you're after, we can certainly say that it's working for some people.
Many are no doubt put off internet dating by the scare stories, especially because these stick in the mind. Some will find the box-ticking, relationshopping aspects off-putting, or get caught out by the tensions between representing their actual and idealised selves online. Still others will find that low levels of response kills their enthusiasm.
The research, however, suggests that most internet daters are relatively honest and, for some at least, it can be successful.
Just came across this article online, and dude totally agree!!! I have a whole handful of my guy friends that I know this happens to. I am of the firm belief it has something to do with a sexual trauma in their past, and not much to do with the chica or chico. Here read on!
Per Fox Health: Women aren't the only ones who feign pleasure in bed, according to a new study. Men fake orgasm, too.
In a study of more than 200 college students, 25 percent of men and half of the women reported that they'd acted out an orgasm during sexual activity. The biggest motivation to fake it? Wanting sex to end without the awkwardness of hurting their partner's feelings.
The research is published in the November issue of the Journal of Sex Research.
Acting out orgasms
Studies have consistently shown that between half and two-thirds of women have faked orgasm at some point. But because it's tougher for men to fake ejaculation than it is for women to fake a few moans, few researchers had looked at men's rates of artificial orgasm.
The new study, carried out by psychologists at the University of Kansas, asked 180 college-age men and 101 college-age women questions about their sexual histories. Each participant was asked whether they had ever pretended to have an orgasm. To catch those who might be ashamed to admit their deceit, the participants were also asked whether they'd "done something similar" to pretending to orgasm.
Almost 100 percent of those surveyed had experienced some sort of partnered sexual stimulation, whether manual or oral. Just under 70 percent of the women and 85 percent of the men reported penile-vaginal intercourse.
Intercourse turned out to be a major predictor of whether someone had faked it. About 10 percent of men and 19 percent of women who'd had sexual encounters but not intercourse had faked orgasms, compared with 28 percent of men and 67 percent of women who'd had penile-vaginal intercourse. Pretenders tended to be more sexually experienced, and were more likely to have had an orgasm at some point, either through masturbation or intercourse.
Penile-vaginal intercourse was also the most likely type of sex to trigger orgasmic acting. Of those who specified the type of sex during which they faked an orgasm, 86 percent of men and 82 percent of women reported intercourse.
The reason may be that people expect orgasm during intercourse, the authors wrote. Several men in the study reported faking an orgasm because they had no other way to end a sexual encounter without awkwardness.
Why fake?
For men, the most common reasons for faking it were that orgasm was unlikely or taking too long and that they wanted sex to end. Four-fifths of women reported they faked it to avoid negative consequences, like hurting their partner's feelings. Half of men reported the same motivation.
The participants who faked shared a common sexual "script," the authors wrote, in which both genders feel pressure to orgasm during intercourse, with the woman orgasming first. In some cases, people are so wedded to this script they pass up the chance to orgasm for real in order to fake orgasm at the "right" time. The study found that 20 percent of the women pretended to orgasm because their partner seemed about to.
"Some of the women wrote that they actually could have orgasmed, but they chose a pretend orgasm in the right sequence — before or during the man's orgasm — rather than an actual orgasm in the wrong sequence," the authors wrote.
These sexual scripts put undue pressure on both genders, said Carol Ellison, the author of "Women's Sexualities: Generations of Women Share Intimate Secrets of Sexual Self-Acceptance" (New Harbinger, 2000).
"When sex is a performance, and when sex has performance goals — erection, intercourse, orgasms — it's problematic," Ellison, who was not involved in the research, told LiveScience. Ellison argues that sexual success should be redefined as anything that makes you feel good about yourself, good about your partner and as something that enhances your relationship.
"If you change the goal of sex to creating mutual pleasure and finding all the different ways to create pleasure... you'll learn a lot more about sexual responsiveness," she said. "Sex will be a whole different experience."
Friday, December 3, 2010 at 4:28PM