#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @JenSquard
I've been bombarded by all of these expectations in my life, and quite a fair amount lately (and by fair I mean way too many). Even though I don't generally care what people think of me, and consider my opinion the most important in my life, expectations have always been a tough one for me. Maybe it's because I had an abusive dad that had these crazy high standards, but at the same time told me I would never amount to anything. Literally, when I was 14 he told me that having an intership was stupid, that I would never go to college, and I would most likely end up a pregnant drop out. Seriously. And it was so unfounded - even though I was a wild child, I was a great student, active in school, and incredibly driven. That was so obviously not the path I was on, like ever. So expectations have always been something I have tried to live up to, since disappointment tends to be my kryptonite.
Anywhoozle, I stopped trying to live up to people's expectations years ago, but it still hurts my inards to know that someone somewhere considers me to be not enough. It's terrible, because I am enough. I don't need anyone's validation or approval, so what the hell? I am mostly tired of the negative expectations because of the way I look or my day to day life. Here are a few:
The expectation to be a good housekeeper because I'm a "stay-at-home-mom". Um, no. If you want my house to be clean, you can try keeping it picked up with 3 cats, 3 dogs, 3 kids and a husband. Good luck.
The expectation to be a bad mom because I have a faux hawk. And a lip ring. People are constantly acting shocked when I talk to my kids with respect, and when they behave themselves in public. Believe it or not, alternative people, which I don't even consider myself, are generally the best parents because they aren't trying to keep up with people, they are honestly just living.
The expectation to take a picture of everything because I am a photographer. I do it as a living, and as art. I don't just take pictures of dumbass stuff, like a weird piece of gum stuck to the road. Thanks, though.
The expectation to blog about everything. Just because I lifecast doesn't mean I am going to talk about your secrets. If you do something crazy, it might get mentioned. But I am lifecasting, not friendlifecasting. I'm not going to secretly video anyone and post it. This is about my life and experiences, and those just don't include selling people out or talking about every.single.thing. that I see in a day.
I am liberating myself of these expectations and the judgements that come along with it. There are several things you can expect from me. You can expect me to always do my best, be giving to my friends and family, have a sense of humor, and love with 100% of my soul.
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Thursday, December 16, 2010 at 8:17AM
