Happy happy birthday pretty ladyface!
Wish I could be there for your party!
And I sure hope you get your kitty choked, if you know what I'm saying. Get it? Kitty? Choked? Kitty?
HAPPY BIRTHDAY FRIEND!
We all love your stinkin guts.
Send her a lovenote of your own! Twitter.com/JenFriel or Facebook.com/JenFriel
While popular myth says that giraffes have a ton of vertebrae, they have only have seven cervical vertebrae - exactly the same amount that we have. Their long ass neck certainly poses dangers for them, like bending down to drink, but it is also their biggest defense. They stay standing for everything, including sleep and birth. They are thought to only sleep less than an hour a day, in little tiny naps throughout the night. They rest from time to time, but for full blown sleeping, they rest their neck on their hindquarter and do it as little as possible.
Every giraffe has a unique set of spots, and they can be identified through them, just like fingerprints. You can also tell their age from their spots - they get darker as they get older. Hmmm...what else? Oh yeah, they have horns! And they're born with them, unlike most mammals. And these horms are legit horms, not antlers or keratin, they are bone and extend from the skull. Wanna know my favorite part about giraffes? Their tongues are black. Totally rad.
So, about their giant bodies...they are around 16 feet tall and their tongue is over 2 feet long. They are crazy strong, but super peaceful. And they can kill an adult lion with a single kick. The bull giraffes often neck fight by smacking their necks into each other to establish dominance. It is generally harmless, but pretty terrifying to watch. They are one of the few "silent" mammals, which just means they don't communicate audibly often, but are capable of it. They are frickin awesome, and now you know why.
I would love to hear your thoughts! @JenSquard
@JenSquard | tagged animal facts, animal nerd, giraffe, giraffe facts, jen squard, jen swedhin, knowledge bomb, talking nerdy | 
#nowplaying: Greatest Love of All - Whitney Houston
Man, as I was typing that line, the #TalkNerdyToMeLover's part, it really hit me that I am a part of this community. It feels so great, too! I have always had a lot of friends and been an active participant in school and stuff, but I would never really consider myself part of many communities. I've always tended to distance myself a bit, mostly because my dad told me that everything I did and said was stupid. So even when I had great friends and people thought I was really funny, I was still terrified of saying something stupid. I was constantly humiliated at home, and I just didn't want that to happen in front of my peers. I remember hanging out with the popular senior guys when I was a freshman and just not saying anything, even though I knew every song reference they were making, and got every joke. They must have thought I was retarded, or just hot enough to get away with it.
It feels nice to finally own my awesomeness. I am awesome in so many ways. I don't need validation from anyone anymore, and I am finally allowing myself to be part of communities. I share my thoughts and ideas with fellow photographers, and other moms even ask me for advice. ME. I never thought the day would come that people would ask for my advice because they think I'm awesome, and not because I'm their manager or something.
I try hard at everything I do - I don't think you should do anything if you aren't going to do it right, so I put everything I can give into everything I do. So it feels so great to finally be recognized as having something to offer. I'm so proud to be a lifecaster on this site, and thank you all for you input and support. I really do appreciate it more than I can express, and I feel that it's making me a better person in all aspects of my life. I'm sure my children thank you as well.
Okay, off to homeschool some crazy pre-schoolers. And buh-bye.
I love to chat! So hit me up on Twitter or Facebook - it'll make my day!
For most men sex is a sensory adventure - physical, visual, auditory, the whole thing. Whatever it is that turns a man on (boobs, butt, nakedness in general) will always turn them on. Something naughty whispered in their ear or sent over text = ready to go.
Women, not so much. For us sex is mental. Show me your wiener all day long, and it's just not going to prime the pump. I need some brain action first. That is what foreplay is all about for the ladies (I am speaking in general, of course). Don't grab my boobs, move south, then expect me to be ready. Instead, start earlier in the day. A couple of calls or texts to say you are thinking about your lady. A token to show you actually are thinking about her, like a drink from her favorite coffee shop. Stimulating conversation is always a good one - talk about what turns you on, a secret fantasy, something from your sexual bucket list. Compliments may get you some play with some girls, but in general "you're so sexy" doesn't mean much. And unless it is in the major heat of the moment, something like "I'm so hard" is likely to be a buzzkill. Instead try, "You make me feel so alive".
Seriously, every woman is obviously different, but it is going to start upstairs. Make my mind race and the body will follow. Having said that, I am in NO WAY excusing you from physical foreplay. Nice try, sucka. Take it slow, but don't draw things out. Some ladies like to kiss for hours. I get bored with that after about 4 minutes. And keep in mind that if play to the point of exhaustion, you will likely be finishing solo. What I'm trying to say, is foreplay is essential, but don't forget that it is leading to something. Hopefully.
Have some tips of your own? Or questions? I'm here to help! @JenSquard
For me, life is all about opportunities. Either opportunities taken or missed. I try hard not to miss opportunities, big or small. I have missed a couple, and those stick with you - I had the opportunity to go to Broadway with a class in 8th grade, and France in high school. My dad said no way - opportunity missed, and it still breaks my heart. I will never again be in 8th grade, and when I do make it to see a Broadway show I will view it totally differently. If I do make it to France, the experience will be entirely different as an adult with kids than as a high schooler with a heart too big for her body.
So when I had the opportunity to fall in love, I took it. It was fast and hard (that’s what she said - oh!), and it was beautiful. It wasn’t always perfect, and I had to fight for it (more on that later), but it was passionate and fulfilling. I never thought of my relationship with Brian as anything unusual - we love each other like crazy, would do anything for one another, and are a perfect fit. That stupid “you complete me” saying actually makes sense for us. He made me a more sane, level headed and even tempered person, and I taught him that it’s okay to be who he is, let him come out of his shell, and gave him the chance to be a strong, independent man.
Our first few months together were wild - and I would have married him that first summer, he just didn’t ask. Once we settled into our life together things just worked. We lived together in a tiny 500 square foot house with our two nutty cats. He both went to college a few blocks away, and took as many classes together as we could. When his appendix burst I worked 60 hours a week on top of school to get us through. He cooked and cleaned and brought me dinner every day. Things were stressful, but we got through it well together. 
After about a year we started looking at rings. I wasn’t one of those girls that always dreamt of my perfect wedding and all that junk, I honestly never wanted to get married. I was wild as hell in high school, and a hubby and kids just wasn’t part of my plans. When we started looking at rings it just felt...right. Not like the next step, but like something that would round out our relationship. We picked something we liked, and we left it at that. A few months later Brian asked me to marry him (in a frickin awesome way, but more on that later, too) and I said yes yes yes yes yes. 
We got married the fall of 2006. Our marriage has been just about as close to perfect as you can get. We have bought a house together, had three kids, started a successful business and career, and strengthened our bond. This marriage wasn’t about what we were supposed to do. I didn’t marry him because I was 22 and needed the validation. Even though I was young, I have never felt like I am missing out on anything. I did it for the right reason - because I have loved him from the first week I knew him, and thought it would be a fun adventure for us to go on together. The opportunity to unite myself with my perfect match presented itself, and who was I to pass that up? And contrary to popular belief, the pressure to get married and start procreating when you are 25 don’t exist anymore. Most people told us we were too young, to wait, and that marriage is no different than living together. We were supposed to date for five years, travel while we were young, and make sure we actually loved each other before we got married. Bullshit. Time is not going to make me love him any more or any less. And I would love to travel, but I don’t know many 22-year-old college kids that can afford to travel any more than we already had. 
Do I ever miss the days when I could do whatever I wanted and sleep with whomever? Not so much. I miss the easiness of being single, the freedom of not having kids or a husband, but that is because that all happened when life was a breeze - money was all mine, no one to answer to...but I wouldn’t trade the support or companionship for anything. Has it been easy? Hell no. It’s been hard, it always is when you live with someone else, especially when money gets tight. Sometimes I wish our life was a little more exciting, but then I look around - it doesn’t get much more exciting than watching three kids that you made with your best friend grow and learn. Our friendship develops more every day. He appreciates me as much as I appreciate him.
So before you assume that anyone married under thirty did it for the wrong reasons, consider that maybe they did it because it was a good opportunity to broaden parts of their lives that you haven’t discovered yet. If you want to be single, party it up, or sleep with a new person every night, do it. But don’t judge me for choosing to spend my nights next to my favorite people. Don’t feel bad for me being married with kids - I feel lucky, and might even feel a little bit bad for you.
What's your story? Tell me! @JenSquard
@JenSquard | tagged jen squard, jen swedhin, life casting, lifecaster, marriage, marriage opportunities, married young | 
